side. I wanted to make myself indispensable. I didn’t want to be dependent on anybody again.’
She turned her attention to the window, evading him.
‘I’ll not bore you with the details, Darian. Let’s just say I learned what it takes for a woman to survive among cut-throats.’
The omissions spoke more than any description ever could. Frey didn’t need to be told about the rapes and the beatings. Physically weak, she’d have needed to use her sexuality to play men off against each other, to ensnare a strong companion for protection. A rich girl who’d never known hardship, she’d been forced into whoredom to survive.
But all that time, she’d been strengthening herself, becoming the woman he saw before him. She could have gone home at any point, back to the safety of her family. They’d have taken her back, of that he was sure. But she never did. She cut out every soft part of herself, so she could live among the scum.
He didn’t pity her. He couldn’t. He only mourned the loss of the young woman he’d known ten years ago. This mockery of his lover was his own doing. He had fashioned her, and she damned him by her existence.
‘By the time I got to the Delirium Trigger, I’d made my way in the underworld. I had a reputation, and they respected me. I knew the crew was troubled and I knew the captain was a syphilitic drunk. It took me a year, building trust, winning them round. I knew he was planning an assault on an outpost near Anduss, I knew it would be a disaster, and I waited. Afterwards, I led the survivors against him. We threw him overboard from two kloms up.’
She gazed across at him. Her black eyes seemed darker in the faint light of the electric lamps.
‘And then you turned yourself into a ghoul,’ he finished.
‘You know how men are,’ she said. ‘They don’t like to mix desire and respect. They see a beautiful woman in command and they belittle her. It makes them feel better about themselves.’ She looked away, her face falling into shadow. ‘Besides, being pretty never brought me anything but pain.’
‘It kept you alive,’ he pointed out.
‘That wasn’t living,’ she returned.
He had no answer to that.
‘So that’s the story,’ she said. ‘That’s what it takes to be a captain. Patience. Ruthlessness. Sacrifice. You’re too selfish to make that crew respect you, Darian. You surprised me once, but it won’t happen again.’
There was a knock at the door. A spasm of irritation crossed her face. ‘I gave orders that I wasn’t to be disturbed!’ she snapped.
‘It’s urgent, Cap’n!’ came a voice from the other side. ‘The Ketty Jay has gone!’
‘What?’ she cried, surging to her feet. She tore open the door to the cabin. A crewman was outside, obscured from Frey’s view by the door.
‘She were following us with her lights on,’ came the breathless report. ‘All of a sudden, the lights go out. By the time we got a spotlight over there, she were nowhere to be seen. She could’ve gone anywhere in the dark. She’s disappeared, Cap’n. Nobody knows where.’
Trinica’s head swivelled and she fixed Frey with a glare of utter malice.
Frey grinned. ‘Surprise!’
Thirty-Three
Jez, in the pilot’s seat of the Ketty Jay, flew on into the night. The craft was dark, inside and out. The light of the moon edged her
