up. “Is there any hope?”
Doolittle opened his mouth and closed it without saying anything.
I turned and marched down the hallway. The Lighthouse Keepers had to have a base. Someone had to have owned or rented that van. Someone supplied them with explosive bolts. The only time I’d ever seen them used was when Andrea put two of them into a blood golem controlled by my aunt. She had to have them special- ordered.
I would find the Keepers. I would find them and murder every single one of them.
Curran caught up with me. “Where are you going?”
“I have things to do.”
He barred my way. “You look like shit. You need a medic. Let Doolittle fix you.”
“I don’t have time for this.”
He leaned to me, his voice quiet. “This isn’t open to negotiation.”
I unclenched my teeth. “If I don’t hurt something, I’ll lose it.”
“Either you let him mend you now or you’ll run out of gas in the middle of a fight when it counts. You know your body, you know you’re at your limit. Don’t make me carry you.”
“Just try it.”
He bared the edge of his teeth at me. “Is that a challenge, baby?”
I glared at him. “Would you like it to be, darling?”
A hulking figure loomed in the hallway. Mahon.
Thick and barrel-chested, the alpha of Clan Heavy looked like he could step in front of a moving train and force it to screech to a halt. His black hair and beard were salted with gray. He didn’t like me much, but we respected each other and since Mahon was the closest thing Curran had to a father, both Mahon and I went out of our way to remain civil.
Mahon finished maneuvering his massive frame near us. “My liege. Consort.”
“Yes?” Curran asked, his voice rumbling with the beginnings of a growl.
Mahon fixed us with his heavy stare. “Unlike your quarters, this hallway isn’t soundproof. Your voices carry. These are trying times. Our people look to you for guidance and example.”
Doolittle held open a door to a side room.
Mahon inclined his head in a slow half bow. “Please, Consort.”
Fine. Half an hour wouldn’t make a difference anyway.
CHAPTER 18
I AWOKE ON OUR COUCH. MY WHOLE BODY ACHED, deep down, all the way to my bones. Pain was good. Pain meant I was still alive and healing.
Curran leaned on the windowsill, silhouetted against the window, where the dusk or dawn bled crimson onto the sky. The sun was in the east. Morning then. I’d slept for several hours.
Muscles tensed across Curran’s wide back. He knew I was awake.
No matter where I was or how much trouble I was in, he would come to get me. He would demolish the city to find me. I didn’t have to go at it alone.
Several floors below, Julie was sleeping while her body worked to betray her. My Julie. My poor kiddo. Some people awoke to escape their nightmares. I awoke into one.
“Any change?”
“She is still asleep,” Curran said.
“Doolittle sedated me, that old bastard.”
He turned around. “No. He was chanting your wounds closed, and you fell asleep. I brought you up here. Does it hurt less now?”
I shrugged. “How do you know it hurt in the first place?”
“You held your breath when you walked.”
“Maybe I was just pissed off.”
“No.” He came toward me. “I know when you’re pissed off. It’s the way you stand. I know the look.”
He noticed the way I stood. What was I supposed to do with that? “Grendel?”
“He’s in Doolittle’s infirmary. Nothing serious. A few bruises and a sliver of wood stuck in his paw. Andrea returned to the Keep. She says they were eating and he took off on her with no warning. Went through the restaurant’s window.”
Silly poodle. How had he even known we were in trouble?
Muscles played along Curran’s jaw. “We should’ve found Leslie. We’d tracked her all over the city. Her scent was less than three hours old in Palmetto. If we had found her, none of this would’ve happened. You can’t save everyone. I’ve made my peace with that. We should’ve saved Julie . . .”
“I love you,” I told him.
Curran stopped in midword and strode to me. I kissed him, sliding into his arms. “I don’t want to talk,” I whispered. My cheeks were wet and I knew I was crying. My voice didn’t tremble, but the tears kept coming and coming. I’d lost my mother, my stepfather, and now in two days, my kid as well. It was time to pay the piper.
Curran kissed me, his lips sealing on mine. His tongue slid into my mouth, his taste so familiar, so welcome. I clenched his shoulders, pulling him closer, pulling his shirt off. He moved the sheets aside and broke apart from me for the tiniest second to peel my tank top off. I kissed his mouth, my fingers in his short hair, asking for his strength. His hands slid over my breasts, the rough skin of his palms scratching at my nipples. He lifted me to my knees and licked my left breast, the heat of his mouth piercing through all of the pain swirling inside me. I let go of it all and lost myself in him, kissing, licking, stroking, wanting to be one.
He rose above me, I wrapped my legs around him, and when he thrust inside me, the world took a step back. There was only me and him. We built to a smooth hard rhythm, faster and faster, each thrust lifting me higher, until finally heat blossomed inside me, drowning me in a cascade of pleasure. He shuddered and emptied himself. We stayed like that for a long moment, then he moved to the side, gathering me up to him. We lay, curled up together, as the day uncurled outside the window.
I refused to let Julie go. There had to be a way around it. There had to be something I could do. She wasn’t a loup yet, damn it. There had to be a way.
“We’ll kill them,” Curran said, his voice laced with so much violence I almost shivered. “We’ll stamp them out.”
Yes. “A year from now nobody will remember they existed.” There would be no more Lighthouse Keepers after we were done. It wouldn’t help my kid. But it might keep other Julies from being hurt.
A knock resonated through the door.
“What?” Curran growled.
“Jim is here, my lord,” Barabas said.
I pushed off the pillow.
“Tell him to wait,” Curran said. He turned to me. Gray eyes looked into mine. “I love you, too.”
Maybe he truly did. “Promise me that if we leave, nobody will touch Julie until we return.”
Gold rolled over Curran’s eyes and vanished. “Not if they want to live.”
“Not even an alpha of a clan.” I didn’t know how dark the inside of Jennifer’s head was.
“Not even an alpha. Julie is sedated and restrained in her bunk. The access to her room is restricted, and Derek is staying with her. He’s gotten it into his head that if he and Ascanio hadn’t gotten into it, the bouda kid would’ve put up more of a fight. Jennifer doesn’t have a prayer of getting past him, nor would she try. That’s not who she is.”
He swiped his sweatpants off the floor.
I put my clothes on. “It wouldn’t have mattered about Ascanio. She was a trained render. You could’ve killed her. B. Mahon. Jezebel, maybe. Jim . . .”
“Kate,” Curran said. “And now the entire Keep knows it.”
I stopped with a boot in my hand. He was actually proud of me. I heard it in his voice. Oh hell.
