“But you want me to prevent it from happening again, even though innocent people will die. Sounds to me like you have a fatal fl aw. You can’t remain detached from what happened to your sister.”
“Let’s keep this about you,” she said. “You’re a soldier, a man of action. You can’t survive in captivity.”
“By captivity you mean settling down, raising a family?”
“You tried it before, with Janet and Kimberly. Didn’t you learn anything? Your domestication only served to torment the people you love.”
“You think you know me—”
“We both know you. You’re an eagle. Eagles don’t flock. They can’t be domesticated. They do not thrive in captivity.”
“You must be the worst marriage counselor in the world,” I said.
“Quit working for Victor. Get your mind back in the game.”
“My country needs me, eh?”
“Not to make a cliche out of it, but yes, we do.”
“What about Sal?”
“Sal Bonadello?”
“Do you object to my working for him?”
Nadine took some time to weigh the question. She sighed. “I suppose not.” She saw my eyebrows rise in disbelief and added, “Sal’s jobs keep you sharp. In the end, what’s it to society if tomorrow morning we all wake up and find there’s one less bit of scum on the pond?”
“Nadine, you’re an astonishingly bad psychotherapist.”
“That’s entirely possible, but it doesn’t change who you are, or what you were meant to do.”
“Nevertheless,” I said, “I aim to quit the business, marry Kathleen, and help her raise Addie.”
She said nothing.
“You’re disappointed in me,” I said.
“Not true. As for marrying Kathleen, if that’s your motivation for getting strong and healthy, it’s as good as any.”
Chapter 46
I’d been warned that the physical therapy would be agonizing. Instead, it was thrilling. Every stabbing pain made me feel alive, eager for more. Dr. Howard kept trying to back me off the weights and leg machines, but I was relentless, having set a goal to be in Kathleen’s arms within ten days. Nadine was just as relentless in her attempt to keep me out of “captivity,” but what could she do? In a competition for my soul, Kathleen would always win.
One day Nadine walked into my room and turned off the CPM machine that had been flexing and extending my knees.
“Conner,” she said, “there’s someone here to see you.”
My heart raced. “Kathleen?”
She shook her head. “If you choose Kathleen, you’ll have to approach her on your own.”
“So who’s here?”
I heard the electric whir before I saw him.
“Good to…see you…Mr. Payne…you’re…looking…well.”
“Hello, Victor. Where’s Hugo?”
“He’s…in the…corridor…with…someone.”
