'Well met, Kalen,' Fayne whispered. She smiled. 'Coins bright?'
TWENTY-NINE
'You're here,' Kalen said, and he stretched. Though he didn't expect a duel, he didn't turn his back on her and checked the dirk at his belt. He made no hasty moves, and didn't let his eyes linger on her curves under the blanket. 'Cellica let you in?'
'Yes.' Fayne bit her lip, her smile chased away by his cold voice. 'And no. She doesn't remember I'm here. I warded us'-she nodded to the door-'against sound.'
'You-' Kalen winced at the zzar ache in his head and rubbed his stubbled chin. 'Are you wearing anything under that blanket?'
Slowly, Fayne lowered the blanket to reveal a thin white ribbon around her throat, from which hung a black jewel. Then she raised the sheer back to her chin.
'Ah.' Kalen coughed and kept his gaze purposefully averted. Fayne rolled her eyes. She sar up and lowered the blanket to bunch around her. 'This is stupid, I know, and I'm a fool to come here, but I just have to say something, Kalen. You don't ever, ever have to see me again afterward, I just have to say it.'
Kalen walked near the bed but remained standing. 'Then say it.' Silence reigned berween them for a moment. They looked at one another.
Kalen had seen Fayne nearly naked at the temple, but that had been different. A battle, when his blood was up. Now, her skin seemed smooth and soft. She was so very vulnerable, deprived of clothing. She seemed younger and lighter-fragile.
Like Myrin.
As though she could read his thoughts and wanted-needed- to turn his mind to her, Fayne opened her mouth and the words gushed forth.
'I… oh, Kalen, I've made a terrible mistake,' she said. 'A woman is dead because of me-because of my pranks. And… and I wanted ro teil you that I'm sorry.'
Kalen broke the gaze and looked toward the window. 'Don't,' he said.
Fayne's eyes welled. 'Kalen, please. Please just let me say this.'
She sat upright and edged closer to him. When he stepped away, she stayed on the bed, peering up at him.
'You were… you were right about me,' she said with a sniffle. 'I am just a silly girl who doesn't think about the hurt I cause. My entire life, all I've done is lie and ruin. I have a talent for it, and the powers to match, and that was how I made coin. All I've ever done is scandalize folk-some honest, most dishonest-for gold.' She wiped her nose.
'Sometimes I did nobles and fops, sometimes people of real importance-merchants, politicians, traders, foreign dignitaries. Whatever they believed or fought for, I didn't care. I know-I was a horrible wretch, but I didn't care.'
She sniffed and straightened up, looking at him levelly.
'I… I was doing the same thing with Lorien and Ilira and 1 didn't mean anyone to get hurt.' She cast her eyes down. 'You believe me, right? I didn't mean-'
Kalen kept his silence but closed his hand on the hilt of the dirk he wore at his belt. The dirk was a cheap, brute object without the elegance of Vindicator, but it could kill just the same. He'd spent the day searching for Fayne, but he hadn't realized that it had been equally a matter of anger as concern.
He didn't know how he felt.
'Explain why I should believe you.'
'Why would I lie about this?' Fayne asked.
'I do not know-but you are lying.' Kalen fished in his satchel and pulled out the folded Minstrel. He pulled it open and set it on the table. Then he drew his dirk and slammed it through her false name, pinning the broadsheet down. 'Explain that,' he said.
She bunched the blanket around herself, rose, and padded toward him on bare feet. 'Oh, Kalen!' She flinched away from the broadsheet as though from a searing pan on a fire. 'That… that creature killed my mother. I–I just wanted to cause her pain, rhat's all. But I never meant anyone to die-that was Rath's doing.' ^ 'How do I know you didn't hire him?'
'I'm telling you the truth!' Fayne cried. 'You saw him try to kill me. He would have done so, if you hadn't come!' She sobbed. 'I didn't want anyone to die.'
'I don't believe you.' He put his hand on the dirk-simultaneously gesturing to the broadsheet and offering a quier threat. 'Why write that? You know who killed Lorien.'
'I… I was upset, Kalen!' Her eyes grew wet. 'You don't understand! I was there when she killed my… I saw it happen! I hate that woman, Kalen-I hate her!'
She ripped the Minstrel off the table, tearing it against his blade, balled it up, and hurled it to the floor. Her scream that followed nearly shook the room.
Kalen flinched and looked to the door, but Fayne had spoken true. Had it not been warded against sound, Cellica would have burst in.
'So why not kill her? 'Kalen asked. 'Why Lorien, and not Ilira?' He stepped closer to her, so he could seize her throat if he wanred.
'I don'r-I don't like people, aye,' Fayne said. 'I hate them. I hate everyone, especially her-bur I don't hate enough to murder. That isn't me, and… and I have to make you see that.'
'Why do I matter so much?'
Fayne wiped her eyes and nose. 'Because I can't-not with you. I can't lie to you or trick you. You always know-you always know.' She sobbed again. 'Ir was so, so frustrating at first, but-there's something between us, Kalen. And it's something I can't understand.'. Kalen looked into her eyes. How rich they seemed-bright, wet pools of gray cloud in her half-elf face. How earnest and true.
'I have to know, Kalen.' She made a visible effort to compose herself, grasping her hands tightly in front of her waist. 'Is… is what we have real? Can that really happen between two people who meet only for a moment? I've never loved any…' She trailed off and stared at the floor. She stomped angrily-frustrated. 'I don't understand! It's not-it's not fair!'
'Fayne,' Kalen said.
'You!' she cried. 'The one man I can't have-the one man I should flee-but I can't leave you. Even now, as I stand here naked before you-you, who chastised me, who rejected me, who threatened to arrest me, and I can't leave-I can't just forget you.'
Tears slid down her cheeks, and he couldn't have spoken if he tried.
'I need to know if I love you, and if you love me,' she said. 'I need… I need something real in my life of shadows and lies. Does that make any sense? Can't you understand?'
Kalen looked away when she met his eyes. He weighed her words and body language, probing for a lie, but found nothing. This was the truth, as far as he could tell.
Hers was a life of shadows and lies, he thought. Like his own life.
'Oh, Kalen,' Fayne said. 'Say something… say anything, just please.'
Kalen turned toward her. 'It isn't true.'
Fayne's body went rigid, as though his gaze had turned her to stone. 'What isn't true?'
'That a woman died because of you,' Kalen said. 'You didn't send Rath to kill her.'
Fayne inhaled sharply.
'I believe you,' Kalen said. 'Your game was thoughtless and wicked and took Lorien off her guard, but it is not your fault-'
Fayne threw an arm around his neck and kissed him hard. It caught Kalen off guard and he staggered back a step. He could feel the pressure and could taste her lips on his, even with the numbness. The blood thundered in his veins, and he could feel his heart beating in his head.
'No.' Fayne pulled away. 'No. I'm sorry. I just… I had to. I'm sorry.'
