'Will we touch like this?'
'Perhaps yes, perhaps even that.'
Carnelian did not believe him. He knew the Wise would be always there. 'I can't bear it,' he said. Osidian silenced him by pulling his face into his chest. He could feel Carnelian's mouth, his tears. Carnelian pulled himself away. 'How much time do we have?'
Osidian said nothing, but stared up into the shadowy ceiling.
'How much?' Carnelian demanded. There's no more time.'
Carnelian felt his heart become a stone. He felt it spreading numbness up into his head, down to his groin. 'No.' He shook his head. 'No.'
Osidian jabbed a tear from his eye. 'We have to face it.'
'My father said that there're four days, maybe five until they do it.'
'Yes, but the rituals, the preparations… they're endless, inescapable…'
'But you've to go down to the Labyrinth?' Osidian looking at him, nodded. 'Couldn't we go there another way?' 'What other way?' Through the Yden.'
Osidian stared. Carnelian watched Osidian's eyes lose their focus as he calculated the possibilities. 'No,' he said at last. 'I couldn't do it.'
Carnelian fixed him with his eyes. 'Even one more day like this. Just one!' He could see the cracks appearing in Osidian's resistance. 'So we'd cause consternation. What of it? You'll have your whole reign to appease the Wise.'
Osidian was crumbling. Carnelian could see the boyish hope peeking through. 'We'd have to let them know… tell them something…'
'We could leave my father a letter. In all this world he at least should understand.'
Osidian nodded slowly. 'He won't quickly forgive us for forcing him to stand alone against the Wise.'
'He bore thirteen years of exile for your father's sake. He's stood against your mother and won. He speaks for the Great. Are the Wise so terrible?'
Osidian looked at him with round eyes, as much as to say, you have no idea. 'As you say, we'd have all my reign to make it up to him.' Then you'll come?'
Osidian smiled a crooked smile. 'How could I not?'
Carnelian gave a whoop and threw himself on him. They wrestled violendy until they fell onto the floor and rolled apart.
Osidian sat up panting, grinning. When Carnelian began to move towards him, he put up his hand. 'I submit. I submit.'
Carnelian embraced him. They leaned their heads together.
'Will you write the letter?' Osidian asked.
Their ears rubbed together as Carnelian gave a nod.
'I'll still have to return to my household, give them instructions.' He disentangled Carnelian's arms gently, stood up. They placed him back into his robe. 'Meet me before sunrise at the usual place.' They grinned at each other, they kissed and Osidian left.
Carnelian. slumped onto the bed. He gathered up the sheets and wrapped himself in them. Doubt surged in his stomach. He frowned, wondering if he was making a mistake.
Carnelian sat cross-legged, with the parchment on the low table in front of him a narrow rectangle in the lamplight. He drew the glyphs carefully with the pen as his father had taught him. Several times he stopped, angling the pen so that it would not drip ink onto the parchment, then looking off into the darkness. His lips moved as if he were speaking but he made no sound. He was trying to explain to his father how he felt. How could his father not understand? But if he did not, no matter. Carnelian knew with a deadly certainty that he would withstand his father's fury a hundred times if that was the payment demanded for this last day of freedom with Osidian.
Carnelian let Tain in when he scratched at the door. His brother stared at the nest of sheets, the table in the middle of the floor, and at Carnelian's white flaming weary happiness, his haunted look, the way he danced a little when he walked, the way he looked at him but saw another.
'Did I do right to let the Master in?'
Carnelian grabbed him, hugged him, kissed him. 'Never have you done so right.'
Tain smiled uncertainly. 'He gave you joy?'
'Joy, yes, and…' Carnelian stopped, his limbs seeming suddenly cast from lead,'… despair.'
Tain could not understand it at all. It seemed a kind of madness.
'Yes, it is a kind of madness,' Carnelian said, smiling sadly. 'Such consuming fire…'
Tain brought him food, and cleaned him when he stood still long enough. He tried to chat and sometimes Carnelian seemed to listen, but then he would narrow his eyes and look away. Tain made a bed for himself upon the floor. When he turned off the lamp, he could almost feel Carnelian staring into the darkness.
Tain could not wake Carnelian. He shook him, a wail beginning to escape through his gape. Suddenly, Carnelian came alive, gulping as if Tain had just drawn him up drowning from the depths of a well. His arms locked around the boy, squeezing.
'Carnie! Carnie!' Tain cried as he struggled to free himself.
Carnelian kissed his neck with passion. Terrible, terrible, terrible,' he muttered.
Tain was scared. 'Carnie, Master, please let go.'
Carnelian opened his eyes impossibly wide. His arms lost all their strength and Tain fell out of them. Carnelian put his hands to his face. 'Sorry, I didn't… it was…' He sighed, shaking his head, backing away up the bed. 'A dream…' His mouth gaped, his eyebrows twitched.
Tain stared for moments, then, Today… we must get ready to leave today.'
Today,' echoed Carnelian. He remembered the letter. He stumbled off the bed and found it where he had left it. He stared at it, knowing he must tear it up. His mind saw his hands tearing it but instead they gave it to Tain. Carnelian turned to focus on Tain standing gripping the letter. It was already out of reach. He felt suddenly free, as if he had escaped from a court robe of stone.
He smiled at Tain. 'I'll not be coming with you.'
Tain frowned, looked nervously down at the letter in his hands and back up at Carnelian.
'I've been a little distraught, Tain. Don't worry about it. I'm going away but will join you in a day or two. Please, give that to the Master this evening. Don't give it to him earlier. If he asks tell him that I commanded you. Once he reads it, he'll understand.'
'But Carnie… where are you going?'
That doesn't matter. You'll do as I say?'
Tain looked miserable, but he gave a hard nod.
That's good. Now let's get me cleaned up a bit.'
As Carnelian said his farewells to Tain, he assured him that he would see him in the Labyrinth the next day, the day after at the latest. Then he left the chamber.
The corridor was a flurry of packing. Guardsmen dropped what they were doing to escort him but he sent them back to their work.
The Ichorians at the mouth of the tunnel into the Sun in Splendour were more difficult to persuade, but eventually they too gave way and opened the portcullises.
The air in the Sun in Splendour was rosy-hued. He crossed to the trapdoor and opened it. He lit his lantern and hesitated for a moment looking down into the darkness, then went quickly down. After the commotion above, the silence was eerie. Doubts came crowding in with the blackness. He stopped and could just hear faint sounds coming down the stair. He lifted the lantern to push back the gloom and reveal more steps below him. He imagined Osidian waiting for him at the moon-eyed door. The thought of him quickened his heart. He laughed at the darkness. Osidian was a bright beacon.
He walked through the midnight halls. Unusual brightness swelled ahead. His steps faltered. He shuttered the lantern. Soon it was bright enough for him to see his way without it. He listened for voices. He drew closer and looked into the great round chamber. Lamps had been hung all round its wall. The door to the library was gaping open. Arranged before it, like sarcophagi washed out by a flood, were rows and rows of chests. Hearing nothing, Carnelian crept into the light. He looked at one of the chests. It was long and narrow and had five rows of paired golden nipples on its top. Its side was studded with silver spirals. Nearer the floor, a long carrying pole passed
