'Probably should make sure it's not cow piss before we celebrate too much.' I told BT.
'Wait, what? Why would a farmer need cow piss?'
'He's messing with you BT,' Nicole said with a smile.
'This is where I'd laugh my ass off if you weren't such a friggen giant.' I smirked at him.
'Just check it,' BT said, and I could tell by the sound of the words he wanted to add an expletive at the end.
I unscrewed the small air tap and was welcomed with the slightly metallic, bitter smell of a full drum of diesel fuel. If it was gas we'd have to take the truck and no one would relish their time in the back no matter how many blankets we could stuff back there.
'Now what?' BT asked.
'Well, first I'm ripping the upholstery out of the drivers' seat in the hummer. I don't care if I'm sitting on bare metal, there's no way I'm sitting back down on the remains of that poor bastard. Then I'm driving that thing over here, filling it up. Maybe see if there is anything worth draining out of the tractor. Then I'm going to need a little help polishing off those beers and then tomorrow we head out.'
'Sounds like a plan,' BT said as he headed out what was apparently the front door of the barn. With only bits of straw to impede his progress, he made good time.
'Hey, don't sweat it. I don't need any help.' I shouted to his back.
'Good thing,' he replied. 'I'm tired and my leg hurts.'
'Always with the leg, how long you gonna milk that?' BT flipped me off and then I lost him in the glare of the snow-shine as he opened the door. 'Real nice, you know that hurts my feelings right?'
Nicole took this moment while we were alone to ask a question. I figured this was going to be the big reveal.
'Dad, can I talk to you?'
'Sure sweetie. What is it?' I asked as I turned away from the drums to look at her.
Two sounds took this most inopportune time to fight simultaneously for my attention, my son's shout of warning and the high-pitched whine of a small vehicle engine. Sounded like a damn mini-bike but I couldn't figure out how someone could possibly be driving one in this snow. BT was no more than two strides from the door when I caught up to him. His gaze led right to the intruder astride a snow mobile.
'Oh, that's what that is.'
'He's got a rifle,' BT said, squinting with his hand shielding the sunlight from his eyes.
'Doesn't necessarily mean trouble. Wouldn't you have one if you had the choice?'
'I hear your words Mike, but they're not making me feel any better.'
'Yeah, me neither. How close would I have to get to use a pitchfork?' I looked back towards the house. Travis was pointing towards the vehicle and now people were lining the windows on the first floor to get a better view. 'I wish they'd be a little more inconspicuous.'
'Yeah me too.' BT agreed, never looking towards the house to see what I was talking about. 'Umm, Mike.'
'Yeah?' Just then the snowmobile revved high and shut off. The ensuing silence was not nearly as peaceful as it had been a moment before his arrival. Expectancy hung in the air.
'Good to see you're doing well, Mike.' A cold calculating voice shouted across the vast white waste.
'Durgan.' BT and I said simultaneously.
'He's like a cockroach,' I bitched. 'Can't kill him.'
'Mike, we need to talk!' Durgan shouted.
'I'm a little busy right now, I've got some muffins in the oven and I really don't want them to burn!' Durgan didn't laugh. I glanced over at BT. 'He really doesn't appreciate my humor.'
'In this, I'm in agreement with him.' BT answered.
'Let the muffins burn Mike!' Durgan shouted angrily.
'That's hilarious, he believed me.' I smiled with satisfaction.
'See, that's your problem,' BT said. 'You have piss poor comedic timing.'
'Au contraire.'
BT turned to face me. 'Oh come on, you throw these huge words around, I bet you don't even know what half of them mean.'
'I do know what half of them mean,' I lied. I had turned to face BT, neither of us looking towards Durgan. The rifle shot changed that quickly.
'I'm fucking talking here!!' Durgan screamed. I could see an arc of spittle fly from his mouth even from this distance. 'I need to talk to you now Talbot, there will be no more warning shots.'
'You're the one with the motorized get up, why don't you come over here?' I replied.
'Not a chance, come here now or I start taking some pot shots through the windows at your brood over there.'
'Asshole,' I muttered
BT and I started the trek across the field.
'Not the colored one!' Durgan shouted.
'Who?' I asked back.
'The Negroid, he is not welcome here.'
'Negroid? Who's a negroid?' I asked.
Red blotches were spreading across Durgan's face.
'I think he's talking about me,' BT answered loudly.
'Holy shit! You're black?!'
'Now see Talbot, that's funny!' BT said to me. Then he turned to Durgan and said words that chilled my spine and warmed my heart. 'Next time I see
I absently ran my hand over my neck, thankful those words weren't directed towards me. With that said, BT went back to his spot by the barn door. Durgan looked like he might have busted a few hundred blood vessels in his face as beacon-red flushed every exposed inch of his skin.
'Into the valley of death they rode.' (I wanted to finish with the pop culture phrase of 'Because I'm the biggest baddest mofo around,' but I was scared shitless.) Until you've been shot, you can't even begin to understand how much you never want to experience that sensation again. Durgan was in complete control. I had my K-Bar on me but I was sure that he wasn't going to let me get that close. I got to within twenty feet. Durgan lowered his rifle to a point directly midway on my chest.
'Stop there,' he said with a sneer. I complied. 'Now kneel.'
'Go fuck yourself, I'm all kneeled out.' Fear and pride raged within me. I watched as Durgan's trigger finger whitened under the strain of holding back. I was playing a dangerous game but I had a hunch. I usually only bet on scratch tickets with a hunch, this was a big jump for me. 'Listen, we both know if you had your choice you would have already pulled that trigger, so stop preaching and do your master's bidding, messenger boy.' He really was an impressive shade of red, especially from this close up. She must have had him on a short leash because he was straining every muscle in his not too shabby bulk to pull that trigger and kill me.
Could I run up there with my knife and kill him? Did he have a fail-safe switch if he were threatened that would let him defend himself. I had NO compunction whatsoever with killing this man even if he could not defend himself,
'Stop.' Eliza's voice said coldly. Durgan's features slackened as Eliza took the reins. 'I will let this useless piece of meat kill you. I hate him for what he is but he is still of use to me, for now. But you are almost less than useless.'
'Coming from you I think I consider that a compliment.'
'You dare to jest with me? Will you still seek humor as I rip the unborn fetus out of your daughter's womb as you watch?'
Her words were so cold she made sure they were laced with the imagery of her act. I dry retched into the
