‘I did. Once. It was awful. Horrible. It was some time after Magnus’s funeral. I didn’t know if he had told her about us before he died and at the funeral I tried to pretend that nothing had happened. But I noticed immediately that Leonora wouldn’t look at me. Wouldn’t speak to me. Pretended I didn’t exist. I knew then that Magnus had told her.’
‘Did she want to see you or…?’
‘Yes – she called and asked me to come and see her in Grafarvogur. She greeted me very coldly.’
Solveig broke off. Erlendur waited patiently. He sensed her discomfort at reopening these old wounds.
‘Leonora told me that Maria was at school and that she wanted me to know exactly what had happened at the lake. I told her I didn’t need to know anything but she laughed and said I wouldn’t escape so lightly. I didn’t know what she meant.’
‘Magnus told me about the two of you,’ Leonora said. ‘He told me you were going to move in together and that he wanted to leave me.’
‘Leonora,’ Solveig said, ‘I-’
‘Shut up,’ Leonora said, without raising her voice. ‘I’m going to tell you what happened. But there are two things you must understand. You must understand that I had to protect the girl and you must understand that it was your fault as well. Yours and Magnus’s. You brought this on us.’
Solveig did not speak.
‘What were you thinking of?’ Leonora asked.
‘I didn’t mean to hurt you,’ Solveig said.
‘Hurt me? You have no idea what you’ve done.’
‘Magnus was unhappy,’ Solveig said. ‘That’s why he turned to me. He was unhappy.’
‘That’s a lie. He wasn’t unhappy. You stole him from me – you lured him away.’
Solveig was silent.
‘I don’t want to quarrel with you,’ she said at last, quietly.
‘No, what’s done is done,’ Leonora said. ‘No one can change it now. But I don’t want to bear the burden alone. You’re responsible too. And so was Magnus. You both were.’
‘No one’s responsible for an accident like that. He fell overboard. It was an accident.’
Leonora smiled a thin, unreadable smile. She looked to be in a strange state. The house was dark and cold and Leonora didn’t seem herself. Solveig wondered if she had been drinking or was on strong medication.
‘He didn’t fall in,’ Leonora said.
‘What do you mean?’
‘He didn’t fall.’
‘But… I read it in the papers…’
‘Yes, that’s what it said in the papers. But it was a lie.’
‘A lie?’
‘For Maria’s sake.’
‘I don’t understand you.’
‘Why did you have to take him away from me? Why couldn’t you leave us alone?’
‘He came to me, Leonora. What lie did you have to tell for Maria’s sake?’
‘Don’t you understand? We were with Magnus in the boat. Maria was with us.’
‘With you…? But…’
Solveig stared at Leonora.
‘Magnus was alone in the boat,’ she said. ‘It said so in all the news reports.’
‘It was a lie,’ Leonora said. ‘My lie. I was with him and so was Maria.’
‘Why… why did you need to lie…? Why…?’
‘I’m telling you. Magnus didn’t fall off the boat.’
‘What, then?’
‘I pushed him,’ Leonora said. ‘I pushed him and he lost his balance.’
A long time passed before Solveig spoke again. Erlendur listened to her story in silence, sensing her distress at what had happened.
‘It was Leonora who pushed Magnus so he fell in,’ she said. ‘They watched him drown. Magnus had told Leonora about me. They’d quarrelled bitterly that morning. Maria didn’t know and asked them to come out in the boat with her. Magnus was really angry. They started quarrelling again. Then the engine suddenly broke down. They quarrelled even more violently. Then Magnus stood up to check on the engine. Leonora shoved him away from her and it all happened in a flash… he went overboard.’
Leonora regarded Solveig in silence.
‘Couldn’t you have saved him?’ Solveig asked.
‘There was nothing we could do. The boat was rocking uncontrollably and it was all we could do to stop ourselves falling in. The boat drifted away from Magnus and by the time we had got it back under control he had vanished.’
‘Oh my God!’ Solveig gasped.
‘See what you’ve done?’ Leonora said.
‘Me?’
‘The girl is inconsolable. She blames herself for what happened to her father. For the quarrel. All of it. She’s internalised the whole thing. She imagines that she’s somehow responsible for her father’s death. How do you think that makes her feel? How do you think she feels? How do you think I feel?’
‘You must talk to a doctor, a specialist. She needs help.’
‘I’ll look after Maria. And if you take this any further I’ll deny the whole thing.’
‘Why are you telling me, then?’
‘You’re not going to get off scot-free. I want you to know that. You’re as responsible as I am!’
Erlendur stared at Solveig for a long time without speaking after she had finished her story.
‘Why didn’t you go to the police?’ he asked finally. ‘What stopped you?’
‘I felt… I felt as if I bore some of the responsibility myself, as Leonora said. For what happened. She was quick to point it out to me. “It’s your fault,” she hissed at me. “It’s your fault. All of it. You’re to blame.” All her anger was directed at me. I was out of my mind with fear and grief and a strange kind of concern for Leonora. The whole thing was just too much for me, much too much. It was such a shock. I was completely unprepared. And then there was poor little Maria. I couldn’t bring myself to tell the truth about her mother. I couldn’t do it.She…’
‘What?’
‘It was so unreal that I could hardly believe it, could hardly believe it had happened.’
‘You wanted to protect the girl?’ Erlendur said.
‘I hope you understand my position. I didn’t want to punish anyone. It was an accident, however you look at it. It didn’t occur to me to doubt what Leonora said. She told me she never let Maria leave her side except when she was at school.’
‘It can’t have been pleasant living with this knowledge,’ Erlendur said.
‘No, you’re right, it hasn’t been pleasant. So imagine how it must have been for them, especially for Maria. When I heard that she’d committed suicide… somehow it didn’t come as a surprise. I’ve… I’ve blamed myself for letting it happen. For letting Leonora get away with what she did. Get away with not telling anyone about this.’
‘What were they quarrelling about on the boat?’
‘Magnus said he was going to leave her no matter what she said. It was what he’d told me. He’d had enough of the way she rode roughshod over him, couldn’t stand her any longer, said all that remained was for them to agree on custody of Maria. Leonora said she’d see he never got access to the girl. He could forget it. They fought over Maria right in front of her. No wonder she thought it was all her fault.’
‘Did you ever meet Leonora or Maria again after that?’
‘No. Never. Neither of them.’
‘Were there no witnesses?’
‘No. They were completely alone at the lake.’
‘No visitors?’
