shaken her. Truly, demons haunted the wilderness; that was why folk kept to their towns and didn't wander. Anji offered her a swig from a finely tooled leather bottle. The slap of rice wine, gone a little vinegary, burned her mouth and soared straight to her head.
'Hu!' She giggled. 'That makes me even more thirsty.'
'Thirst is a powerful goad,' he agreed, smiling. He had a particular way of looking sideways at her that made her shiver with anticipatory pleasure, but when she shivered like that she always, the next instant, thought of Cornflower's blank expression. Hump hump hump.
Enough of that! Cornflower was gone. Yet the image wouldn't flee and refused to be chased away.
'What are you thinking?' he asked abruptly. He'd never asked such a question before. Husbands didn't care what their wives thought. They didn't need to, so her mother and the aunts often told her.
She was taken aback, caught off guard. Lie, or be truthful?
She shook her head, impatient with herself. She had often held her tongue, but she'd never outright lied to anyone. 'I'm thinking of Cornflower. I-' After all, she could not go on. It was too intimate; it was too humiliating. He might misunderstand, or he might understand, which could be worse. Her cheeks were hot. She gritted her teeth, trying to untangle her thoughts and her tongue.
Sand pattered on the ground as the wind eddied, then died. It was a clear day, without haze, and the sky was as blue as Cornflower's eyes and as empty of joy.
'Her death, or her life?' he asked. 'Aren't they the same? She must have run out into the storm seeking her freedom. That would be her death. Her life…'
'You think she did not live well in your father's household?'
'How could anyone do so?' she asked bitterly. 'Used like that?'
'Was she beaten?'
'Not after Uncle, the one whose name we don't say, not since he died. The aunts wouldn't touch her. That was the strange thing. They wanted to be rid of her but they didn't hate her even though she had bewitched all the men.' None of the women had hated Cornflower. It was peculiar, when you thought of it. You expected women to be jealous in such a situation, but instead they had all pitied her while just as strongly wanting her gone. Their silence was their shame. 'They didn't hate her even though the men couldn't leave her alone. But she didn't bewitch you.' She wasn't sure how he would respond. It was a risky comment.
Anji wasn't a man who frowned much. He did so now, causing lines to crease his brow. 'No. She didn't bewitch me. I've seen demons face-to-face before. I know what they're capable of. Mai…'
He looked away from her, studying the red-brown horizon to the south, as if seeking storms. He wasn't shy, just considering his next words. He rubbed at his lower lip with a dirty thumb. Like all of them, he was astoundingly filthy, hands and face coated with grime, officer's tunic gone to a color that could not be described. She rubbed at her own hands as she waited, but the stuff was caked on. She could feel sand in every most intimate crevice, and every time she blinked, her eyes stung from the residue.
'No,' he said firmly, to himself. And to her: 'It was nothing.'
'It was something.' She stared at her hands and then, with as much courage as she could muster, she looked at him, and stumbled on heedlessly. 'I saw her face when that man was on her. She just lay there. She looked like she was dead, all limp. There was nothing in her eyes or her expression. Nothing! Nothing! Nothing!' She burst into tears.
His mouth had become an 'o' of surprise. He rocked back on his heels as if struck. For ten gulped sobs-her sobs-he stared at her. It took him that long to collect himself, and maybe it was his surprise that soothed her crying, because she could suddenly swallow the rest of her tears and dry her eyes. Her cheeks were slimy with dirt and moisture.
'I need a bath,' she finished, and hiccoughed once.
He handed her the leather bottle, and she drained its contents in one slug and braced herself for the jolt as the alcohol hit.
'Mai.' The captain took one of her hands and looked at her closely. 'I am not those men. I never wanted Cornflower more than I wanted you. Never never never.' He had Ti's diction down perfectly.
She laughed, and hiccoughed again, and he released her hand and strode away toward Chief Tuvi. She wondered if it was better that he misunderstood her after all. She wondered what it was like to take a bath with a naked man, and if a man and woman might wash each other in all their secret places and be pleased to do so, for of course she and Ti had peeked at a certain book kept in one of the drawers of Father Mei's desk that had contained all kinds of drawings depicting what a man and a woman might do with each other. The uncles had looked at that book a lot, and then afterward padded down the hall to the slave barracks.
She wondered why Cornflower had vanished during that terrible storm. Could demons die? And if so, what awaited them beyond Spirit Gate?
'Mistress?' Priya returned, O'eki limping beside her.
'I hope you are not hurt?' Panic flared.
'Just sore, Mistress.' The big man slipped a hand inside one sleeve and drew out three small items, which he offered to her.
She took them without thinking and studied them with confusion: three tiny beaded nets, the kind of gaudy cheap ornament women used to tie off the ends of braids. 'What are these? They're very colorful.'
'Cornflower wore them,' said Priya. 'She always wore her hair in a trident braid. These were hers, the only thing she possessed.'
Mai shivered, wondering if ghosts could reach out through the material goods they had left behind to throttle those they had hated during their lifetime. Yet if that were so, all of Uncle Girish's little treasures would long since have poisoned the Mei clan, which still prospered. She looked up at O'eki. He had a broad face and dark eyes, no different from anyone else; it was only his unusual stature that set him apart. He'd come from the southwest, from an area conquered by the Mariha princes when he was a boy. He'd spent most of his life as a slave to the Mei clan, bought by Grandfather because of his size and placidity. But he wasn't stupid.
'How do you have these?'
'I found them. At dawn, just before we left that cursed place.'
'Where?' She glanced toward Captain Anji, but he was exploring the ravine, involved in an intense conversation with Chief Tuvi and the scouts. Tuvi was gesturing with expansive circles; Anji had his arms crossed, a skeptical frown on his face.
'Right up by the big rock where we were camping when the storm hit, Mistress. Just lying there, like she'd torn them off. Or they'd been torn off her.'
She closed her hand around them. The mystery of Cornflower's disappearance troubled her, and the evidence she held in her hand suggested that the story might be more complicated than it had at first seemed.
'What will you do with them, Mistress?' asked O'eki. 'I can sell them, if you please, at the next market.'
'No. I'll return them to Shai. What she had belongs to him.' She slid them into the pocket sewn into her sleeves. The expensive blue silk gown she had worn so proudly at leave-taking was soiled beyond repair. She had left her other silks closed in the chest in the hope they would survive the journey without being ruined. Unlike linen and wool, silk fought sand better. It might become dirty, wet, and stained, but sand could be shaken out because it couldn't get as much purchase in the smooth, tight weave.
The men had walked close enough that she could overhear them.
'It's too risky to ride this path at night!' Tuvi exclaimed, voice rising as his hands dropped to his side.
'If you're afraid, don't do it,' said Anji. 'But if you do it, don't be afraid. I'm more concerned about water and the heat than the road. We have lamps, and moonlight for part of the night. We'll depart a hand's span before sunset. I won't sit and wait for events to overtake me. There might be another storm. Best to move on. It always is.'
'So you would say!' said Tuvi with a laugh, but he made no more protests.
In late afternoon they made ready to leave. About a hand's span before sunset, they headed up the twisting path, riding swiftly until the light faded. Then, with the moon already in the sky, they dismounted and walked along the trail, such as it was, with Chief Tuvi and the scouts in the lead bearing lanterns.
'You can ride,' Anji said to Mai. 'I'll lead your horse.'
'No. I'll walk with the others.'
'Very well.' It was difficult to see his expression, whether he was pleased or irritated, and she didn't know
