So he did, and I turned the dial to High. Sure enough, the whole bed began to shake.
Hey,' I said as we started jiggling, 'that's crazy. Now's a good time to have a swig of Galliano.'
'Oh, I forgot to bring it,' he said. 'But I do have this cold A amp;W diet root beer. Isn't that great!'
I just looked at him, and he put an arm around my shoulders.
'The important thing, Mabel,' he said, 'is caring. Don't you agree?'
'Oh sure,' I said, wondering where the hell he was coming from.
'I care for you so much,' he went on. 'You have no idea.
Do you care for me, dear?'
'Would I be here if I didn,t?'
He held me tighter and nuzzled at my neck. 'We must respect each other,' he crooned, 'and love each other. I want to tell you my innermost feelings, and I want you to tell me yours. I want us to be truly intimate, Mabel, to share all our secret thoughts and dreams.'
Meanwhile that insane bed had warmed up, was going faster, and we were bouncing up and down like acrobats on a trampoline.
Herm had trouble hanging onto me.
'Just to cuddle with you is so wonderful,' he said, speaking louder because the bed was beginning to sound like a meat grinder.
'I've wanted a romance like this all my life. I know now that if there can be warm understanding between a man and a woman, that's the most marvelous thing in the world.'
'Herm,' I said, 'how do you turn this goddamned thing off?'
'You and I can create a whole new world of two,' he babbled on, still with that sappy smile. 'I want us to become so loving that nothing, not even death, can ever part us. Oh, Mabel, Mabel, Mabel, I love you so much.
'When?' I yelled. 'When?'
He hugged me tighter to keep me from being bounced off.
'Snuggling like this,' he shouted in my ear, 'is the answer to my dreams. I want to spend the rest of my life being. the best, the truest, the most loving friend you've ever had. I want tall 'Shit!' I screamed, and got off that galloping bed. I staggered a moment, caught my balance, and headed for the door.
As I ran down the corridor, I heard his echoing wail, 'I love youuuuuu!'
EYEWITNESSTESTIMONY made a meet with Teddy O. on Wednesday morning, this is September 2, and I says to him, 'Teddy, I'm sick and tired of futzing around. Let's do it today.'
'Yeah,' he says, 'it's about time. I figure about one o'clock will be best. The Fiddler dame is usually home then.'
'How do we do it?'
He shrugs. 'Nothing fancy. We just bust in and ask her politely to give us the name of her boyfriend, the chemist with the ZAP pill.'
'And if she clams up?'
'Then we unclam her,' he says, grinning. 'Believe me, she'll talk.
Either the easy way or the hard way.'
'Okay,' I says. 'Let's leave here at noon. Maybe we'll grab a burger and some fries first. We'll go in your car. Are you sure you won't need any backup?'
'I'm sure,' he says.
I phoned Mabel Barrow on Wednesday morning, figuring to get her out of the house by tricking her into coming to the Bo-teek to look at a new shipment of lingerie. But she said she had a lunch date and couldn't make it.
So when Jessica and Willie showed up at Hashbeam's in jess's car, I told them what had happened.
'But she said she'll be gone all day,' I added. 'So there's no need to change our plans.'
'Good enough,' Willie said. 'As long as the kid is there by himself.'
'Look,' I said, 'I don't want to sit here all day sucking my thumb.
Give me a call after it goes down and let me know what's happening.'
'I'll phone you,' Jess promised. 'Now give me the keys to your Taurus.
You got enough gas?'
'Full tank,' I assured her. 'Listen, I wish you guys the best of luck.'
'Piece of cake,' Willie said, and I hoped he was right.
I brought all my stuff over to the Barrows' garage on Wednesday morning after Mother left for work. Chet had already brought his things down, so we were all ready to go. But Mrs. Barrow was still in the house, and we talked about how we could run away while she was there.
'We didn't think of that,' Chet said. 'How are we going to call for a cab if my mom is here? She'll want to know what's going on.' , Then we saw my father wave to us, and he left in his car.
'Now we can move all our stuff to my house,' I said, 'and call a cab from there.'
'Gee, I don't know,' Chet said, and I could see he was worried. 'Mom could be looking out the window and see us leave.'
We were still talking about what we should do when Mrs. Barrow shouted from inside the house and said she was going shopping and would be home in time for dinner. So we waited until she drove away, and then we went into the Barrows' kitchen to phone.
I drove Laura's car with Willie the Weasel in the passenger seat.
He wasn't saying much, and I could tell he was going over our scenario in his mind, figuring how to react if something went wrong.
'No rough stuff, Willie,' I warned him.
'Nah, Jessica,' he said. 'It's not my style. I've got a scam all worked out. The kid knows me, see, and thinks I'm a friend of his dad.
So I'm going to tell him his old man was hurt in a lab accident and is asking for him.'
'You think he'll fall for it?'
'Sure he will. Then once he's in the car, I can handle him.'
'I hope you're right.'
'Trust me. And as soon as we get to your place, I'll phone Barrow at Mcwhortle's.'
'It's tricky, Willie.'
'It's a sure thing,' he said.
'The last time someone told me that, I got busted didn't i, had to pay a fine, and was lucky I get tossed in the slammer.' ,you worry too much,' he said.
Tania and I waited in the garage until my mom drove away. Then we went into the kitchen and phoned the cab company. Tania wanted to do the talking, so I let her. She gave the man our address and told him to hurry. She was real bossy.
He said it,ll be about twenty minutes,' she reported. 'So now all we have to do is wait.'
'Maybe we should move all our stuff out to the curb,' I said.
'No,' Tania said. 'Someone might see us and ask where we're going.
We'll have the cab pull in the driveway and we'll load up right here.'
'Listen, Tania, do you think you should call your uncle and tell him we're coming? He might be out.'
'He can't go out,' she said. 'He's in a wheelchair and never goes anyplace. But maybe I'll phone anyway and- tell him we're on our way.'
So she did and talked to her uncle a few minutes. Then she hung up and said, 'He's there, and everything's okay.'
'Are you sure he'll give us the money?'
'I know he will,' she said. 'He promised, and I trust him.'
We were standing outside in the driveway, watching for the cab, when a Ford Taurus pulled up in front of our house. A man and a woman got out and came walking toward us. I recognized the man. He was the guy in the silver Infiniti who said he was an old friend of my dad. , Tania phoned me a few minutes before noon on Wednesday and said she and Chester Barrow were all packed and ready to go, and she had already called for a cab. They would be out at my place within a half hour to pick up the hundred dollars.
