from him now. Yet if he did not go, he might not see her again for days or even weeks. Elizabeth had finally caused him to make up his mind.
'Have you seen your neighbors across from us?' she had asked. 'I am so happy to see that they have made new acquaintances. They felt like strangers and outsiders when they first arrived, I think.'
'Yes, I noticed them earlier,' Mainwaring had replied, 'and was about to pay my respects, in fact.'
'Oh, William,' she had said, laying a hand lightly on his arm, 'perhaps you should wait until Lady Emily returns to the box. Only that horrid little girl is there at present.'
He had smiled. 'Lady Helen is really not such a horror once one gets to know her,' he had said.
'If you ask me,' Robert had added, grinning, 'allowing you to go, William, is like allowing a Christian into the lions' den. We shall watch from here and come to pick up your remains if it seems necessary.'
So he had gone and had found himself almost totally tongue-tied. He could not have said afterward what they had talked about. He did know that he had felt an unreasonable jealousy of Mr. Timony Simms, with whom she had seemed to be conversing quite happily before his arrival. He had noticed when they stood that they were almost of a height, and they had both looked youthful and shy. Perhaps he was too old for her, too dull, to different in every way.
He had not meant to trick Nell. When Harding had returned with his companions, he had prepared to leave, but he had had a last-minute panicked feeling that if he left then he would never have the chance to talk to her again. So he had turned to her, in the hearing of them all, and asked her to drive with him this afternoon. Of course, it had been a wicked thing to do. He had asked civilly, and she had almost no choice but to agree or make an unpleasant scene. But he had not meant to do it; he had not planned it beforehand.
He was on his way to call for her. He did not know what his reception would be. Perhaps she would have found some excuse for not going out with him. She would almost certainly be angry or sullen. And he did not know what he would talk about, how he would broach the subject that he wished to discuss with her. He wanted to explain to her why he had left her without a word in the summer, and he wanted to explain that he had decided to offer for her even before he knew her identity. But would she give him the chance? And would he find the right words even if she did?
One of his questions was answered as soon as he entered the house on Charles Street. The butler showed him immediately to the drawing room, where the countess and her two elder daughters were entertaining Lord Harding and Mr. Simms. Helen entered the room almost before he had a chance to greet everyone, wearing a russet velvet pelisse and brown bonnet trimmed with orange ribbons. Her cheeks were flushed, her eyes bright.
Lord Harding and Mr. Simms got to their feet. The latter made her an elegant bow. 'Lady Helen,' he said, 'I hoped to see you this afternoon. Will you be at Lady Kirsten's musical evening tomorrow? I hope to see you there-and your sisters, of course.'
'I have been looking forward to it, sir,' she replied. 'Lady Kirsten always succeeds in engaging artists of superior talent, I have heard.'
Helen turned determinedly to Mainwaring. 'Good afternoon, sir,' she said brightly. 'I am ready for our drive, as you see.'
He bowed and stood aside for her to precede him from the room.
It was every bit as dreadful as he had expected. She was not angry and she was not sullen. But she was so determinedly bright that he soon despaired of ever breaking through her mask. She smiled constantly and sat bolt upright on the seat beside him.
'You look very pretty, Nell,' he said. 'Just like the autumn.'
'Thank you, sir,' she replied. 'I considered that the outfit would be suitable for the season.'
'Are you warm enough?' he asked. 'There is a blanket that I can spread across your lap if you need it.'
'Gracious no,' she said with a bright little laugh. 'It is a glorious day, sir, quite warm for the time of year. Look, there is not a cloud in the sky, and the sun is still quite high.'
'Do you enjoy driving in London?' he asked. 'It is not any match for the open countryside, is it?'
'Oh, but very much more interesting,' she said. 'One has only to look around to see all kinds and classes of humanity. And driving in the park is a most exhilarating experience. One can see in one afternoon almost everyone who is anyone, and one can learn a great deal about the latest fashions. The countryside has nothing to compare with such excitement, sir.'
Mainwaring was silent for a while. Indeed, turning into the park without colliding with any other vehicle took his whole concentration. It was the fashionable hour, and the day was unusually suited to an outing.
'How are you enjoying London, Nell?' he asked when he could relax his attention again. He turned and looked at her flushed face beneath the brim of her bonnet. 'Do you enjoy all the social activities and the •xtra company?'
'It must be every girl's dream, sir, to spend some months in London,' she said, 'and to participate in the social whirl. How else are we to find eligible husbands and to remain in touch with the important events in life?'
'But I am not asking every girl, Nell,' he said quietly. 'I am asking you.'
She looked across at him haughtily. 'And what makes you think that I am any different from the others?' she asked.
'Nell,' he said, 'not so long ago we could talk to each other, you and I. We could share thoughts and feelings. You were not a brittle little city girl then. Can you not talk to me now?'
'I am a different person entirely from the girl I was then,' she said, looking away from him out over the grass and the trees beyond the traffic of carriages, horses, and pedestrians. 'I have grown up, sir, and I find it boring in the extreme to be reminded of that time.'
'I am sorry,' he said. 'I liked the other Nell.'
And after that exchange, he found, they really had nothing to say to each other. There was so much he wanted to say. He did not for a moment believe that she had really changed so much in such a short time. But he was not adept with words. He was not accomplished at communicating with people. If only he had been Robert Denning at that moment, he thought. Robert would have known exactly how to keep his good humor and how to get her talking. There would not be this almost unbearable tension. What would Robert do right now? What would he say to break down the barriers between them? He tried desperately to answer his own questions. But it was as it always had been with him. The more he tried to think of what to say, the more he found himself tongue- tied.
It was quite a relief to see the Hetheringtons approaching in an open phaeton. He had not been expecting such a reprieve. He had heard Elizabeth say that driving in the park was too funny to be borne. People went there, she claimed, only to show off their new clothes and hairdos and to gather enough gossip to give themselves food for conversation during the coming evening.
She was smiling broadly when the two vehicles drew abreast. 'Good afternoon, Lady Helen, William,' she called gaily. 'Robert and I have decided to join the squeeze this afternoon, too, as you see. It is really far too nice a day to remain indoors, and where else does one go in London if one wants an outing?'
'To tell the real truth,' Hetherington added, smiling mischievously at his wife, 'Elizabeth has a new bonnet and she had to come here to be quite sure that it is far more bang up to the minute than any other lady's.'
'Robert!' she scolded. 'You will put me to the blush. There is really not a word of truth in what he says, Lady Helen. Do you not agree with me that it would be so much more pleasant today to be in the country galloping a horse across a wide field?'
'No,' Helen said, staring expressionless at the smiling marchioness. 'I am much happier just where I am.'
'You look very fetching, I must say,' Hetherington said, filling the little gap of awkwardness that Helen's reply had caused. 'Just like an autumn leaf.'
'Mr. Mainwaring said the same thing to me earlier,' Helen said. 'I suppose it must be true.'
Her tone sounded utterly bored. Mainwaring was acutely embarrassed. 'I believe we are holding up traffic,' he said. 'I shall see you tomorrow morning, Robert?'
'Yes, indeed,' his friend replied. 'The park is much more to my liking in the morning, when it is less crowded. Good day to you, Lady Helen.'
Helen nodded stiffly to the pair of them while Mainwaring took a warmer farewell. They drove on in a
