25.
I’ve got A key to get in, but we don’t want the detectives to know that, so I buzz Callie’s penthouse and she clicks the lobby lock open. I take the elevator to the top floor and knock on her door. When she opens it, I see two plainclothes detectives looking very disgusted by my presence on the scene. They look so much alike, they could be brothers. One has a brown suit on, the other’s wearing navy. Both are wearing ties. Callie leads us into the living room. I study Gwen’s face for any sign that might indicate she asked Carmine to kill me. But her expression offers nothing. I catch myself thinking she’d make a great agent for me, if I could trust her a little more. Or at all.
“Don’t worry boys,” I say to the detectives. “You’re going to love the way I work.”
“Oh yeah?” brown suit says. “Why’s that?”
“Because I’m going to let my clients answer all your questions.”
“You’re what?”
“That’s right. They’ve got nothing to hide.”
“If that’s the case,” navy suit says, “you don’t need to be here at all.”
“True. Except that my presence will keep you on your best behavior.”
“I’ve never seen you, never heard of you,” brown suit says. “You got proof of representation?”
“My proof is my client called me and asked me to come. When I got here, she let me in.”
“I’m-”
I wave him off. “Look, I don’t care what your names are. You’re brown suit, he’s navy suit. I’m Carlos Cohen.”
“Carlos?”
“Yeah, that’s right.”
Brown suit starts to say something, thinks better of it. Turns to Gwen and says, “You don’t seem very upset about your husband’s death.”
“I’m not.”
The detectives look at me, stunned. Not only have I allowed Gwen to incriminate herself, I motion them to continue.
They look at each other.
Blue suit shrugs and says, “Your husband was murdered in cold blood and you’re not upset? Why?”
They look at me again. When I continue to say nothing, brown suit says, “Are you sure you’re a lawyer?”
“I knew you’d love working with me. Just wait till you hear her confession!”
“Her what?”
To Gwen I say, “You may answer the detective’s question.”
“I didn’t love my husband,” Gwen says. “He lied to me, and cheated on me.”
Brown suit is so befuddled, he has to regroup.
Blue suit says, “Mrs. Peters, do you own a handgun?”
“Nope.”
He turns to Callie and says, “Do you?”
“Do I look like the kind of woman who needs a handgun?”
Both suits look at me.
“Please answer the question, Miss Carpenter.”
“No. I don’t own a handgun.”
“May we verify that fact by conducting a quick search?”
“Define ‘quick,’” I say.
“A cursory search. Ten minutes, max.”
“That’s all you need?”
“That’s all we need.”
I look at Callie. She nods. “I’ll allow it, subject to ground rules. You stay together, we go where you go. No questions during the search. You’ve got ten minutes, starting now.”
Ten minutes later blue suit says, “We can wrap this up in five minutes.”
“You’re done,” I say. “My clients have been completely cooperative, and we utilized your time frame.”
“We can come back with a search warrant,” brown suit threatens.
“I wish I could be there when you ask the judge.”
“Why?”
“Because you asked for ten minutes to search the premises. I asked if that was all you needed and you said yes. My clients consented to the search. You did, in fact, search the premises, and found nothing.”
“There’s sufficient cause to conduct a more thorough search.”
“This will be fun to hear. Please enlighten us.”
Brown suit points at Gwen. “Her husband was murdered in her house.” He points at Callie. “And her lover was murdered at the same time.”
“Is that your sufficient cause?”
“Probable cause,” blue suit corrects.
“And did you just now learn that both my clients were connected to the victims?”
“We knew it the night of the murder,” brown suit says.
“Which means you knew it before you asked for ten minutes to conduct your search,” I say. “So you’ve already used up your probable cause search.”
They don’t like what they’re hearing, but they’re veterans. While I may be confusing them, I’m not intimidating them.
Brown suit says, “You may be right. We can let the judge decide.”
“Then let’s,” I say.
We go back into Callie’s living room.
“Miss Carpenter,” brown suit says. “Was Eva LeSage your lover?”
“I’m not going to answer any questions I’ve covered with the police. Gwen and I have cooperated fully, and you know these answers. I’ll give you a quick synopsis, and then you can either ask me something new, that no one has asked during the last four sessions, or you can leave.”
“Let’s hear the synopsis,” blue suit says.
“Eva and I were lovers. Lucky Peters hired Eva for three-way sex on Tuesdays. Sometimes Gwen participated, sometimes she didn’t. Gwen and Eva were friends, which is how Gwen and I met and became lovers. On the Tuesday night they were murdered, Gwen and I were here in my apartment. You’ve spoken to the neighbors. They told you we were here all evening.”
“They told us you were here all evening.”
“That’s because Gwen was already in the house when they saw me come home that afternoon.”
“Can you prove it?”
“My proof is she’s alive.”
“That doesn’t mean anything. She could’ve killed them.”
“Right,” Gwen says. “That’s exactly what happened. I killed the two bodyguards, killed Eva and Lucky, drove to Callie’s condo-wait-I must’ve flown here, because my car was and still is at my house. Anyway, I killed everyone with a gun I don’t possess, flew here on my broomstick and entered Callie’s condo in such a way that none of the neighbors heard or saw me.”
“There’s the confession I promised!” I say. “Now if you boys will go ahead and arrest Mrs. Peters, we can take it straight to the courtroom. And don’t worry about a search warrant. We’ll provide the broomstick now, so you can enter it into evidence.”
Without batting an eye, blue suit says, “Mrs. Peters, do you know Carmine Porrello?”
Gwen looks me dead in the eyes, but I can’t make anything out of her expression.
“Answer truthfully,” I say.
