truth if I did, and I did not want to add to your burdens. I can see, though, that failing to write added to those burdens as well.”
“I can see how happy you are with Mr. Darcy, Lizzy. I recall how unhappy you were before you left for Derbyshire, and I am so glad that you were able to work it out with him.” Despite her smile, her words had an undertone of wistfulness, and Elizabeth realized Jane could be envious of her new intimacy with Darcy.
A playful look came to Elizabeth’s face, and she said, “It was more a matter of accepting the inevitable! But yes, I am very happy. I confess that I had not quite understood how much closer he and I would be once we were married, and I believe that it has been good for both of us. Oh, Jane, I do want you to know him better, since you and he are the dearest people in the world to me!”
Her smile became more genuine at Elizabeth’s words. “I am so glad that he and my dear Bingley are such good friends! But, Lizzy… will you tell me what happened at Pemberley? Were you discovered by someone? I know you had permitted him… some liberties before you left here.”
Elizabeth colored. “Oh, Jane, if I tell you, you will be so ashamed of me.”
“Lizzy, I could never be ashamed of you!”
“Well, Jane, if you are certain you wish to know, I will tell you, but you will not like it!” Elizabeth found herself surprisingly overcome with embarrassment faced with this admission.
“If you do not wish to tell me, I shall not be offended,” said Jane hesitantly.
Putting her hands to her hot cheeks, Elizabeth said, “No one found us; I fear that we found ourselves out, and it was in William’s bed.”
“Lizzy!” Jane’s voice exhibited the deepest of shock.
“So there was only one thing to do, and… I told you that you would be ashamed of me!”
“Not ashamed, but, oh, Lizzy, how could you have, that is, did he…” Jane was clearly unable to even bring the words to her lips. “I am not upset, but… a bit shocked, yes. I cannot understand quite how… venturesome you and Mr. Darcy have been.”
Elizabeth smiled with amusement. “Well, dearest Jane, if you wish an explanation, I will do my best to give one to you, but it is rather difficult since I do not know what license you have permitted Mr. Bingley, nor how you have felt about it.”
It was Jane’s turn to blush. “I am not so daring as you, Lizzy! We have been circumspect; he holds my hand when we are alone, and I have allowed him to kiss my cheek.”
“And have you never wanted more? No, do not try to answer; that was an unfair question. If the truth is to be told, I found William’s kisses very… pleasant, and they grew even more so with time. And the more we indulged in that pleasure, the more tempting it became to do more, and one night the temptation became too great for us. Despite everything our mother has told us about the duties of the marriage bed, it truly can bring great joy and happiness as well.”
“That is reassuring, I suppose, after what she has said! But Lizzy, was it not upsetting for you, afterwards?”
Elizabeth could not prevent a smile. “Well, I was quite shocked at myself, I must admit, and disappointed at my weakness. Certainly I would not have chosen to have it happen so. I had so hoped that you and I would share a wedding! But there are ways in which it was not as surprising as it might have been. He and I have always been out of step with the usual procedure—our time here was more like an engagement for us in many ways. I know that Mr. Darcy saw himself as committed to me very early on, which affected his behavior towards me, and while I would not admit to myself what was happening, I knew some time before I accepted him that I would be marrying him.”
“Yet you always denied any interest in him so vehemently!”
With a rueful smile, Elizabeth said, “My very vehemence was probably the best evidence against me! I believe as well that you saw through me on more than one occasion as far as that goes.” She thought back, wondering when in fact she had gained an inkling that it was inevitable, and a memory came back to her of that first day when he had surprised her with his appearance at Longbourn, when she had asked him how long he would be staying in Hertfordshire, and he had replied, ‘As long as necessary.’
Jane squeezed her hand lightly. “Dearest Lizzy, I hope that we shall always be the best of friends, and that marriage shall not separate our hearts, no matter how far apart we may live.”
Elizabeth heartily endorsed this sentiment.
Thirteen
Darcy came down to breakfast late the following morning with a spring in his step. If he had thought himself insatiable before, it was nothing compared to how he responded in the ambience of Netherfield and the memories it roused in him. It had been a long night of passion in which he had made love to Elizabeth again and again, intoxicated by her eagerness and her soft cries of pleasure.
When he entered the breakfast room, Bingley looked up at him from a plate of toast with a characteristic broad smile and said, “Darcy, you look to be in a fine mood this morning!”
Darcy placed his hands on the table and leaned across it toward his friend. “Bingley, I am married to the most astonishing woman in the world, and if her sister is anything like her, you will be a very happy man indeed.”
Bingley’s eyebrows shot up. “Oh, ho, my friend, is that how the land lies?”
Darcy gave a smug smile. “Indeed it is.”
“You lucky dog!” Bingley shook his head philosophically. “You are cruel to flaunt your happiness in front of me when I must wait for weeks yet for my angel! Our wedding has yet to be rescheduled. I wish
Unaccustomed to the art of deception, Darcy experienced a moment of confusion before recalling the public version of their marriage. Recovering himself, he said, “I would not, in fact, recommend our route to the altar, although I admit that the results are very satisfactory indeed.”
“Darcy,” said Bingley suspiciously, “what are you failing to tell me? You are without question the worst liar I know!”
Darcy gave him a quelling stare, but his spirits were too high to hold it for long. He went about helping himself to breakfast with no further attention to Bingley’s comment. Bingley, realizing with glee that he had found one of those rare subjects on which his serious friend could be teased, closed in. “Come now, Darcy, confess. What happened? Did you deliberately put the idea in the bishop’s head?”
“Bingley,” Darcy said calmly, buttering his toast, “if I were to tell you why we married so quickly, you would feel obligated, as Elizabeth’s future brother, to thrash me within an inch of my life, and that hardly seems a good omen for our future.”
“Darcy! You didn’t!” Bingley’s voice contained elements of both shock and awe.
“And you, perhaps, could vouch for your own behavior if you were to accidentally meet Jane alone, wearing nothing more than a rather revealing dressing gown, in the middle of the night?”
“Well, if I could, it would be because of faith in Jane, rather than myself,” Bingley conceded. Could it be that Fitzwilliam Darcy was actually admitting a failing? With a smile on his face? “Well, given the extenuating circumstances, perhaps I will refrain from thrashing you, but only if Lizzy comes downstairs with a smile on
“In that case, I believe I have nothing to worry about,” Darcy said with a self-satisfied air.
“Are you
Darcy just smiled. “Your turn will come, my friend.”
Bingley rode to Longbourn after breakfast, leaving Elizabeth and Darcy to make their way to the Bennet house on their own. Darcy had nostalgically ordered the curricle readied, which produced an amused laugh from Elizabeth. He took her hand in his, giving her a warmly possessive look, as they drove off, those moments from his courtship of her very much alive in both their minds.
