I screamed, “La-la-la-la-la!”
She continued, “I mean, it’s not like I’d actually feel anything for him. It wouldn’t be like it would have been with Stagger.”
I stopped la-la-ing and lowered my fingers.
Infidel swallowed hard. “If Stagger were still around, I would have head-butted him when he kissed me.”
“Stagger?” Aurora looked confused. “Why would you head-butt him?”
“No! Tower!”
Aurora’s brow knotted with bewilderment.
Infidel looked up toward the tree village, then said in a hushed voice, “Tower kissed me.”
“You’re joking.”
Infidel raised her hand and resumed biting her nails.
“You’re not joking.”
Infidel shook her head.
Aurora crossed her arms, tapping her beefy fingers on her biceps.
“So,” she asked, casually. “Was he any good?”
Infidel rolled her eyes. “It… it was… I really have nothing to judge by. I’ve never been kissed before.”
“You’ve never kissed? For a battle hardened mercenary who wears necklaces of human teeth, you’ve lived kind of a sheltered life.”
Infidel threw up her hands. “What’s the point of me kissing anyone? I mean, what’s it going to lead to? Look, I’ve made it this far without any kind of intimacy. I’ve been perfectly content without it. I mean it. Who needs it?”
Aurora smirked. “In my experience, when people say, ‘I mean it,’ they don’t mean it.”
Infidel folded her arms across her chest. “Fine. Maybe, just maybe… maybe I’m curious. Maybe this is one of those choices made by fifteen-year-old Innocent that I’m not so sure about any more. I mean… this is going to sound stupid… but… I… well, there was this thing he did, when he, um, sucked, uh, my finger and…”
Aurora’s eyebrows shot up.
“And… I dunno. I could feel his tongue. It was, like, soft. Warm. I thought it would be slimy, but it felt clean. It was… I don’t know. It wasn’t nice. I mean, I didn’t want it to happen. But… it wasn’t unpleasant, either. I felt… this is stupid.”
“What?”
“There was like… like a spark. Like, a voice in my head going, ‘He’s sucking your finger! What a pervert!’ and… I… I guess I’m just… curious. About perversions.”
Aurora laughed.
“It’s not funny,” said Infidel.
Aurora shook her head, and wiped a tear from her cheek. “No,” she said, gasping for air. “I know. It’s not. I haven’t seen another female of my species for twenty years. I’m not going to judge anyone for feeling sexually frustrated. The dreams I’ve had…”
“You mean male,” said Infidel.
“Hmm?”
“You said you hadn’t seen another female. But it wouldn’t do you any good if you had.”
“Ah,” said Aurora. She pressed her lips together. “This is awkward. You see, uh, the priesthood, it’s all female, and, um, sexual release is a big part of fertility ceremonies, so, we spend a lot of time engaged in-”
“I don’t think I need to hear more,” said Infidel, holding up her hands.
I sort of hoped Aurora would at least finish her sentence. I was to be disappointed. She changed the subject back to the issue at hand.
“So, you’ve got a sex-crazed ex-boyfriend in charge of the dragon hunt. What about the Truthspeaker?”
“He hasn’t seen through the disguise. Relic said he’s distracting the priest. Don’t ask me to explain, I still haven’t figured out all of that weirdo’s powers. But, anyway, if the priest finds me out, apparently he has orders to capture me instead of killing me outright.”
“That’s good, I guess.”
“Not really. If the Truthspeaker gives me grief, I’ll probably just twist his head off. I’m not sure that Tower’s going to be quite as forgiving after that. And, if I twist Tower’s head off, I’m suddenly short on candidates to father my daughter.”
“Do you want a child?” asked Aurora.
“Until the Black Swan mentioned it, I hadn’t wasted any time thinking about motherhood,” said Infidel. “Now… I mean, if it’s, you know, fate… then maybe I wouldn’t be terrible at it.”
Aurora looked skeptical.
“I know,” said Infidel, shaking her head. “I mean, it’s hard to imagine making the jump from bounty-hunter and tomb-looter to breast-feeder and diaper-changer. The person I’ve been would be a lousy mother. But, the whole purpose of this dragon hunt, for me, is to make a new life. And there are… there are nurturing instincts I have that I’ve never really explored. I just… maybe I should keep an open mind.”
Aurora nodded, but didn’t ask any follow-up questions. Instead she said, “Speaking of the dragon hunt, it’s worth noting that of twelve would-be dragon slayers, the three we’ve lost have all been put out of action by other team members.”
“Technically, Blade was killed by a pygmy deadfall.”
“Blade was killed by the damn Truthspeaker,” grumbled Aurora.
Infidel nodded. “What’s your point?”
“My point is that our dragon hunt is going to be over before it even begins if we kill each other before Greatshadow gets a shot.”
“We won’t all kill each other,” said Infidel. “I’ve got your back. You’ve got mine. And I think we can count on the Goons to side with us.”
“Don’t fool yourself,” said Aurora. “Menagerie’s willing to mess around with stuff that’s not spelled out in his contract, like keeping your secret, but if it comes down to a fight between us and the Truthspeaker, he’s being paid to protect the priest.”
Infidel nodded. “At least you and I are a team,” she said.
“Sure,” said Aurora. “As long as you don’t try to protect the future father of your child if he does have the sacred harpoon.”
Infidel nodded, but she was no longer looking directly at the ogress. Her gaze was once more unfocused; I could practically hear her thoughts churning. As Aurora turned away, Infidel stared off into the distance.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
I’d heard all I could stomach about finger-sucking and motherhood, so I decided to get back to the job and watch Lord Tower. I floated up to his tree house. While I hesitate to say that anything about being dead is fun, freedom from gravity is not without advantages. I drifted through his floor and found him flat on his back, eyes wide open, staring at the leaves above him. He looked as if he was unlikely to get any sleep, and not just because Father Ver was snoring. Tower didn’t look all that happy for a man who had just kissed the woman he’d obsessed about for fifteen years.
“Forgive me,” he whispered, as tears welled in his eyes. “Forgive me.”
He swallowed down his emotions with a loud, snotty snort, then turned onto his side, hugging the thin blanket draped over him.
I sighed. I hated the guy, but I understood what he was going through. What if I’d thrown myself at Infidel years ago and confessed everything I felt for her? She’d said a lot of nice things about me since my death, but
