'Just happened to be passing them, sir, ' Sharpe said, 'when they caught fire.'
Torrance gazed at Sharpe, plainly not believing a word. He shook his head sadly.
'You look very old to be an ensign, Sharpe?'
'I was a sergeant two months ago, sir.'
Torrance adopted a look of pretended horror.
'Oh, good God, ' he said archly, 'good God alive. May all the spavined saints preserve us. You're not telling me you've been made up from the ranks?'
'Yes, sir.'
'Sweet suffering Jesus, ' Torrance said. He lay his head back on the hammock's pillow and blew a perfect smoke ring that he watched wobble its way up towards the ceiling.
'Having confidential information as to the identity of the thief, I took steps to apprehend him. You will notice, Sharpe, that I am giving you no credit in this report?'
'No, sir?'
'Indeed I am not. This report will go to Colonel Butters, an appallingly bombastic creature who will, I suspect, attempt to take some of the credit for himself before passing the papers on to Arthur Wellesley who, as you may know, is our commander. A very stern man, our Arthur. He likes things done properly. He plainly had a very stern governess in his nursery.'
'I know the General, sir.'
'You do?' Torrance turned his head to look at Sharpe.
'Socially, perhaps? You and he dine together, do you? Pass the time of day, do you? Hunt together, maybe? Drink port? Talk about old times? Whore together, perhaps?' Torrance was mocking, but there was just an edge of interest in his voice in case Sharpe really did know Sir Arthur.
'I mean I've met him, sir.'
Torrance shook his head as though Sharpe had been wasting his time.
'Do stop calling me «sir». It may be your natural subservience, Sharpe, or more likely it is the natural air of superiority that emanates from my person, but it ill becomes an officer, even one dredged up from the ranks. A search of his tents, Dilip, secured the missing items. I then, in accordance with general orders, hanged the thief as an example. I have the honour to be, et cetera, et cetera.'
'Two thousand muskets are still missing, sir, ' Sharpe said.
'Sorry, sir. Didn't mean to call you 'sir'.'
'If it pleases you to grovel, Sharpe, then do so. Two thousand muskets still missing, eh? I suspect the bugger sold them on, don't you?'
'I'm more interested in how he got them in the first place, ' Sharpe said.
'How very tedious of you, ' Torrance said lightly.
'I'd suggest talking to Sergeant Hakeswill when he gets back, ' Sharpe said.
'I won't hear a word spoken against Obadiah, ' Torrance said.
'Obadiah is a most amusing fellow.'
'He's a lying, thieving bastard, ' Sharpe said vehemently.
'Sharpe! Please! ' Torrance's voice was pained.
'How can you say such wicked things? You don't even know the fellow.'
'Oh, I know him, sir. I served under him in the Havercakes.'
'You did?' Torrance smiled.
'I see we are in for interesting times.
Perhaps I should keep the two of you apart. Or perhaps not. Brick!»
The last word was shouted towards a door that led to the back of the commandeered house.
The door opened and the black-haired woman slipped past the muslin.
'Captain?' she asked. She blushed when she saw Torrance was naked, and Torrance, Sharpe saw, enjoyed her embarrassment.
'Brick, my dear, ' Torrance said, 'my hookah has extinguished itself.
Will you attend to it? Dilip is busy, or I would have asked him. Sharpe?
May I have the honour of naming you to Brick? Brick? This is Ensign Sharpe. Ensign Sharpe? This is Brick.'
'Pleased to meet you, sir, ' the woman said, dropping a brief curtsey before she stooped to the hookah. She had clearly not told Torrance that she had met Sharpe earlier.
'Ma'am, ' Sharpe said.
'Ma'am! ' Torrance said with a laugh.
'She's called Brick, Sharpe.'
'Brick, sir?' Sharpe asked sourly. The name was utterly unsuited to the delicate-featured woman who now deftly disassembled the hookah.
'Her real name is Mrs. Wall, ' Torrance explained, 'and she is my laundress, seamstress and conscience. Is that not right, little Brick?'
'If you say so, sir.'
'I cannot abide dirty clothes, ' Torrance said.
'They are an abomination unto the Lord. Cleanliness, we are constantly told by tedious folk, is next to godliness, but I suspect it is a superior virtue. Any peasant can be godly, but it is a rare person who is clean. Brick, however, keeps me clean. If you pay her a trifle, Sharpe, she will doubtless wash and mend those rags you are pleased to call a uniform.'
'They're all I've got, sir.'
'So? Walk naked until Brick has serviced you, or does the idea embarrass you?'
'I wash my own clothes, sir.'
'I wish you would, ' Torrance said tartly.
'Remind me why you came here, Sharpe?'
'Orders, sir.'
'Very well, ' Torrance said.
'At dawn you will go to Colonel Butters's quarters and find an aide who can tell you what is required of us. You then tell Dilip. Dilip then arranges everything. After that you may take your rest. I trust you will not find these duties onerous?'
Sharpe wondered why Torrance had asked for a deputy if the clerk did all the work, then supposed that the Captain was so lazy that he could not be bothered to get up early in the morning to fetch his orders.
'I get tomorrow's orders at dawn, sir, ' Sharpe said, 'from an aide of Colonel Butters.'
«There!» Torrance said with mock amazement.
'You have mastered your duties, Ensign. I congratulate you.'
'We already have tomorrow's orders, sahib, ' Dilip said from the table where he was copying a list of the recovered stores into Torrance's report.
'We are to move everything to Deogaum. The pioneers' stores are to be moved first, sahib. The Colonel's orders are on the table, sahib, with the chitties Pioneers' stores first, then everything else.'
'Well, I never! ' Torrance said.
'See? Your first day's work is done, Sharpe.' He drew on the hookah which the woman had relit.
'Excellent,
my dear, ' he said, then held out a hand to stop her from leaving. She crouched beside the hammock, averting her eyes from Torrance's naked body. Sharpe sensed her unhappiness, and Torrance sensed Sharpe's interest in her.
'Brick is a widow, Sharpe, ' he said, 'and presumably looking for a husband, though I doubt she's ever dared to dream of marrying as high as an ensign. But why not? The social ladder is there to be climbed and, low a rung as you might be, Sharpe, you still represent a considerable advancement for Brick. Before she joined my service she was a mop-squeezer. From mop-squeezer to an officer's wife! There's progress for you. I think the two of you would suit each other vastly well. I shall play Cupid, or rather Dilip will. Take a letter to the chaplain of the 94th, Dilip. He's rarely sober, but I'm sure he can waddle through the marriage ceremony without falling over.'
'I can't marry, sir! ' Sharpe protested.
