The War God's Own

Uthmar and Sons, and husband to Haynathshirkan're'harknar, who happens to be the senior alderwoman of Tunnel's End… and an excellent cook. Uthmar, this is Bahzell Bahnakson, Prince of Hurgrum, and the newest champion of Tomanak , and these are our companions, Brandark Brandarkson of Navahk, and Sir Vaijon of Almerhas.'

'You!' Uthmar was pointing at Bahzell with a huge grin. 'You! You're the one in the song, aren't you?'

'I-' Bahzell began, but the dwarf was already humming, and the Horse Stealer heard choking sounds from Vaijon and Kaeritha. The two humans glanced hurriedly away, looking anywhere but at the Horse Stealer, but Brandark only cocked his head, ears pitched forward in innocent attentiveness, as he listened to the melody of The Lay of Bahzell Bloody Hand. The glare Bahzell shot him should have reduced him to cinders on the spot, but he returned it with the bland smile of a man in whose mouth butter would refuse to melt.

'It is you, isn't it?' Uthmar demanded happily at last, and Bahzell gritted his teeth. But then he made himself smile and nodded.

'Aye, in a manner of speaking. Not but what you'd not want to be believing all you hear.' He shot another glance at Brandark. 'Like as not the sot who wrote it all down was drunk as a lord,' he added.

'Oh, I don't care about that,' Uthmar assured him, waving one hand airily. 'Heavens, it's actually a pretty silly song, don't you think?' He sniffed. 'The lines of the third stanza don't scan at all well, and that forced rhyme in the fifth-!'

He rolled his eyes, and Bahzell's ears flicked straight upright. His lips twitched for an instant, and then he laughed out loud.

'Oh, aye, a very silly song,' he agreed enthusiastically, grinning wickedly at a Brandark whose studied innocence had just become a thing of the past.

'Yes, well, but the point was,' Uthmar said, 'that Silver Cavern sent word you'd likely be coming this way, and Clan Harkanath specifically said you've a line of credit.'

'Did they now?' Bahzell watched the dwarf cautiously. He was only slightly surprised to hear Kilthan had sent word up the tunnel that he and Brandark were on the way, for Master Kresco had promised to pass that information on to the Silver Cavern dwarves via the relays. But he was a little surprised Kilthan had mentioned anything about lines of credit.

'Oh, they didn't tell just anyone,' Uthmar assured him, 'but my sanitharlahnahk-' He paused and frowned. 'Um, that would be my wife's sister-in-law's second cousin on her father's side the way you'd say it, I think. Is that right, Kerry?' He looked questioningly at Kaeritha, and she shrugged.

'Uthmar, you know no one but a dwarf can possibly keep your clan and family relationships straight. If you say it's your wife's sister-in-law's second cousin, then that's what it is.'

'Oh dear.' Uthmar frowned for another moment, then shrugged. 'At any rate, my sanitharlahnahk is married to Kilthandahknarthas' sanhanikmah.' He looked at Bahzell as if that should mean something to him. The Horse Stealer glanced at Kaeritha, who shrugged again-helplessly-and then looked back down at Uthmar.

'And?' he said encouragingly.

'Why, that makes us almost brothers!' Uthmar exclaimed, waving both hands in the air. 'That's why he asked me to take special care of you-and your friends, of course-if you should happen to stop off in Tunnel's End.'

'Take care of us, is it? And just what were you having in mind in that regard?' Bahzell asked politely.

'Well, it's plain enough you're not in need of armor. Not-' Uthmar sniffed '-that I couldn't have fixed you up with some much superior to old Kara- But that's neither here nor there! You've adequate armor, and I'll assume you have weapons as well?' He looked expectantly up at the towering hradani, who nodded in confirmation. 'I thought so. I thought so! But I'll wager there's one thing you don't have, Milord Champion, and that's a first-rate watch!'

'A watch?' Bahzell blinked. 'And what in Tomanak's name would such as I be needing with a watch?'

'Everyone needs a good watch, Milord!' Uthmar asserted. 'If you've never had one, you can't begin to imagine how much more efficiently it lets you organize your day! Anyone who works to a schedule needs one, and especially mariners!'

'Mariners?' Brandark's ears cocked sharply. 'Why do mariners need watches?'

'For navigation, Milord-for navigation!' Uthmar shook his head. 'A seaman must know precisely the right time to take his position sightings. That requires the finest chronometer he can get, and with all due modesty, there's not a finer timepiece in all Norfressa than the ones in this shop.'

He waved an arm to indicate his ticking wares, and Brandark followed the gesture with intent eyes.

'Really?' he murmured.

'Assuredly, Milord. Most assuredly. And, of course, he'll need a good sextant, as well, and it just happens that Uthmar and Sons markets the finest Crystal Water Cavern optical instruments and sextants.'

'I see.'

Bahzell could almost feel his companion's palms beginning to itch, and he gave the Bloody Sword a stern glance, then looked back to Uthmar.

'It's honored I am that you should be thinking of us, but I'm thinking we'll do well enough without such, and it wouldn't do for us to be spending Duke Jashan's credit for aught we don't need, so-'

'Oh, but it isn't Duke Jashan's credit,' Uthmar broke in. 'It's Kilthan's.'

'I beg your pardon?'

'I said it's Kilthan's. He set up a credit line for you himself.'

'Did he, now?' Bahzell murmured, and his eyes began to twinkle.

'My, my. Wasn't that kind of old Kilthan,' Brandark said.

'Now, now, lad. Let's not go coming all over grasping. I'm thinking Kilthan had more in mind than to be turning two greedy little boys loose in a candy store.'

'Then he should have said so,' Brandark argued. 'I mean, he does know us, Bahzell. Do you think for one minute he doesn't know how telling us that would affect any self-respecting hradani?'

'Aye, like as not he does-or should. But that's not so much the point as-'

'Oh, come now, Bahzell,' Kaeritha interrupted. 'Brandark's completely correct. Anyone who's ever met the two of you-well, him, at least!-must have known what he'd be letting himself in for.'

'Anyone who met me?' Brandark demanded in injured tones, and she laughed.

'Unless all those books we're lugging around belong to someone else named Brandark Brandarkson!' she shot back, and Brandark made a fencing master's gesture to indicate a touch.

'Now just the both of you be holding on-' Bahzell began, only to be interrupted yet again, this time by Uthmar.

'I really could make you a very nice price on one of my finest watches, Milord Champion. And perhaps one for your illustrious father? And a clock for your mother?'

Bahzell paused, mouth open, then closed it with a click. As Brandark had said, he was a hradani, and the hradani habit of returning home from uninvited visits with odds and ends which had somehow gotten into their pockets was a strong one. Of course, it went against all tradition to actually pay anyone for those odds and ends, but under the circumstances…

His eyes strayed back to the beautifully illuminated faces of the gold- and silver-cased watches, and he felt that centuries old acquisitiveness tingling in his bones.

'You were saying as how old Kilthan set up a credit line?' Uthmar nodded. 'And what sort of limit was he after putting on it?'

'He didn't,' Uthmar said with a wicked little smile of his own. 'I can't imagine how he came to be so forgetful. But, there-he is getting on a bit in years, you know. Still, he's also a kinsman. Don't you think I owe it to him to teach him not to be guilty of such oversights in the future?'

'No doubt you do, no doubt you do,' Bahzell murmured. He looked back up at Kaeritha, then glanced across at Brandark and grinned. 'Now, then, Uthmar,' he said, 'just exactly how much were you saying these watches of yours were costing?'