onyx, one hand undoing his belt. 'Intrigued, yes. Impassioned, definitely. Aroused…' He glanced down at himself. 'I don't believe that is in question. But wrapped around your little finger? I am not so easily manipulated.'

'How about in love?' I asked, suddenly breathless as he knelt on the bed and started crawling up my legs.

He stopped, his face impassive, but inside him a great well of pain existed. 'I have loved women before, Portia. I don't think I could have lasted as long as I have without occasionally being in love, caring for someone, and receiving love in return.'

A knife twisted in my heart. It was unreasonable for me to expect that Theo could live the thousand plus years he had lived without falling in love, but my heart refused to recognize reason.

'What I feel for you is…different.'

Different could be good. Different could be…oh, who was I fooling? Different was horrible. I didn't want to be different—I wanted Theo to love me just as much as he loved the other women in his life. I wanted the same place in his affections, to mean something to him other than a means to an end. I wanted him to love me as much as I was coming to love him!

'I see.' My throat ached with unshed tears of self-pity. 'These women you loved…were they immortal?'

'No. I knew when I began with them that the relationship was finite. I knew they would grow old, and there would come a time when they would die, and I would be left alone again.' He sat back on his heels and unbuttoned his shirt, tossing it onto a nearby chair. With a look in his eye that warmed me despite the pain, he continued up the length of my body. 'You, as I said, are different. Whether by Joining as my Beloved, or by acceptance into the Court, you will be immortal.'

'Which means that when you grow tired of me, you won't be able to count on attrition to get rid of me.'

His breath feathered against my mouth as he settled onto my body. 'I have never grown tired of any of the women whom I loved. I mourned their passings, and felt myself diminished for a time.'

'And then you got over it and fell in love again.' The pain hurt so deeply in me that I wondered if there would ever be an end to it.

'Yes. But now there is you, and you, as I said, are different.'

His lips brushed mine as he spoke. I wanted so badly to kiss him, to taste him, to merge myself with him that my body shook. But the pain at his confession was too much, too much for me to live with. I couldn't do it.

'I need you, Portia.'

Hot tears leaked out of my eyes as I closed them tightly, turning my head to the side to avoid the torturous lure of his mouth. Oh, yes, he needed me. He needed me for sustenance. He needed me to help him achieve his greatest wish—salvation. He needed me not in the way a man needs a woman, but as a partner, someone sharing an adventure, bonded by circumstances into a symbiotic relationship.

You, my love, will be with me forever. You will be mine to love, mine to share the joys of life, mine to explore all the possibilities that lie before us.

I looked at him through eyes made blurry with tears. I wanted so much to believe him, but the pain was too deep to be erased with a few easily spoken words.

You complete me, Portia, don't you feel that? His eyes were filled with fire, but it wasn't just the head of passion that burned within him. It is true I have loved in the past, but I know now that I was only biding my time until you would come into my life. You are life to me, my love. I could not exist without you.

I burst into uncharacteristic tears at such beautiful words. I didn't need to look into Theo's face to know that he meant them—his emotions surrounded me, merging with my own until it was impossible to tell which were his and which mine.

His kiss burned more than just my lips; it scorched my soul with its intensity. I gave myself up to him, relinquished every last bit of me, but I wasn't in the least bit diminished. My heart sang as I drank in the sweetness of his mouth, filling me with such joy that I seriously thought for a moment that I would burst with happiness. I wanted to tell him how I felt, what he meant to me, how the warm kernel of love was growing into a feeling that lit up the corners of my soul, but the words would not come. Instead, I poured into him every emotion I possessed.

You don't have to say it, sweetling. Just as you know what I feel for you, so I can read your emotions.

Good, because it's a bit embarrassing falling in love so quickly with a man who I wanted to see in jail just a few days ago.

Theo chuckled in my mind as his tongue continued a lazy exploration of my mouth. Kismet, perhaps? We were meant to be together.

Do we have time for this? I asked as his mouth moved to my neck, kissing a hot trail down to my collarbone. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for it, but if someone is bringing us food, and you said you thought there was a person whom we could talk to about the murders before the hearing, will we have time for…er…

Wild, unbridled lovemaking?

Exactly.

He froze for a moment, his head lifted and slightly tipped to the side, as if he was listening.

'We will in a moment,' he said, sighing a little as he climbed off me.

Someone knocked on the door. I leaped off the bed and straightened my shirt, hoping I didn't look like we were about to do what we were about to do.

'Your meal,' an elderly woman said, giving Theo a tray of covered plates. He thanked her as she left, setting down the tray on the table and lifting the lids off the plates. The scent of roasted meat and garlic filled the room.

He sighed again. 'Roast beef. One of my favorites. I miss it already.'

'You can't eat any normal food anymore?'

'I can, but Christian cautioned against it until I became more comfortable with the vampirism. Evidently it takes some doing to digest food, and is not recommended for new…erm…inductees.'

Guilt pinged sharply. 'I'm sorry—'

'Don't,' he interrupted, and pulled me into an embrace. His eyes were shining with a warmth that heated me to my toenails. 'I insist that you stop feeling guilty about it.'

'Well, the least you can do is let me feed you,' I said, tipping my head so my neck was presented to him. 'Soup's on!'

'No, you eat first.' He pulled away and waved me to a chair in front of the table.

'You're hungry. We'll take care of you, then I'll eat.'

'You're hungry as well. You first.'

The stubborn look on his face made me smile. I waggled my eyebrows at him, and summoned up my best leer. 'Ah, but I'm hungry for more than just roast beef.'

A speculative glint dawned in his eyes. He looked down at the tray of food. I looked as well. The tray bore two plates of roast beef, potatoes, and assorted steamed vegetables. There was also bread, and something blobby that I remembered from a previous dinner at the pub was Yorkshire pudding. To the side sat a plate with two pieces of cake, lavishly frosted.

'You wouldn't be one of those people who eats her dessert first?' Theo asked as I smiled and picked up the plate of cake.

'Not normally, but I'm willing to break the rules now and again.' I carried the cake to the nightstand, dipping my finger in the frosting before popping it in my mouth and licking it off with exaggerated laps of my tongue. 'Mmm. Cream cheese frosting, my favorite.' I raised my eyebrows, and waited to see if Theo wanted to play.

He looked at the bed, looked at the cake, then at me. Before you could say 'frosted nephilim,' he was naked, lying on the bed, his arms open for me.

'You're sure we have time?' I asked, glancing at the clock.

'For this? Oh, yes. And if we don't, we'll make time.'

I laughed as I started removing my clothing, my heart swelling with love. How could life be so topsy-turvy, such a mess of confusion, and yet so wonderful?

Go with the flow, my brain reminded me. Just go with the flow.

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