The Last of the Red-Hot Vampires

vapid looks. I brushed a speck of non-existent lint off his shoulder, and cocked an eyebrow at her.

She left with a polite murmur.

Very subtle, sweetling.

I strive for excellence.

'I've heard of the Akashic Record,' Sarah said slowly, spreading jam on a scone. She looked deep in thought. 'Isn't it supposed to be some sort of record that God keeps about everything that everyone does?'

I plopped my two pieces of toast onto the mound of food before Theo, swapping our plates. 'Evidently that's the mortal definition, which has been skewed over the centuries.'

'The Akashic Record is simply a listing of all beings in the Court of Divine Blood, the Akashic Plain, and Abaddon, respectively,' Theo said, leaning toward me. 'That bacon smells good.'

'Want a bite?' I asked, offering him a forkful of egg and bacon.

He looked at it with such avidity that it reminded me of what he'd lost. His Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed, silently shaking his head. 'I'd better not.'

Would it make you sick?

I don't know. Christian just said it would likely take my body a while to adjust to the blood diet, and I shouldn't confuse things by trying to eat as well. I dearly love bacon, though.

My heart contracted at the regret in his voice.

'Dark Ones can't eat at all?' Sarah asked, her gaze likewise sympathetic.

'They can, but not for sustenance, and I gather it's only done in situations where it can't be avoided,' Theo answered, his eyes following the path of a piece of bacon as I popped it in my mouth.

What if you just try a little bit? A couple of bites? Just to see how it does?

I don't relish spending the day vomiting, or cramping, or however it is my body would react to solid food.

I felt so guilty that the food turned to dirt in my mouth.

I'm not hungry, sweetling. You satisfied all my hungers earlier this morning, he said, his mind warm and reassuring in mine. It's just that I miss the taste of certain foods.

I swallowed the bacon still in my mouth, wiped my fingers on a napkin, and grabbed his head with both hands, pulling him into a kiss. His tongue danced around my mouth, tasting me, teasing me, his moan of pleasure swallowed with my own.

'I'm delighted you've both found each other, happier than you can know, and I'm the last person I think anyone would call a prude, but I am trying to eat here, and it's a bit disconcerting to have people making out on top of my breakfast.'

Theo slowly pulled his head from mine, giving my lower lip a couple of quick nibbles before our mouths separated.

Better?

Much. Although walking is going to be uncomfortable for a bit.

My gaze dropped to his lap. He was clearly aroused. I hope that is due to me, and not the bacon.

Sweetling, I have yet to be aroused by pork products, he answered. His eyes grew even blacker. Unless I'm eating them off of you.

Sarah gave an exaggerated sigh. 'Can we get back to the matter at hand?'

It was difficult to dismiss the images Theo sent to me, but I managed, by dint of concentrating on my eggs, to keep from flinging myself on him. 'Sure. I take it other than the objection about us sneaking into the Court, you have no other comments?'

'Oh, I have many comments, but I respect you both too much to make them,' she said, waving her fork at the paper. 'Where are the Akashic Records?'

'In the library, the same building where the mare have their offices,' I answered, pouring more coffee and holding it out to Theo. A blissful look stole over his face as, his eyes closed, he breathed deeply of its scent.

'In their offices? Well, now I know you're crazy! Just exactly how do you expect to get to the Records without being seen? Won't anyone who sees you know who you are? Won't the mare do something terrible if they find you there?'

'Theo thought of that,' I said with a proud smile at him, sipping my coffee.

'Disguise?' she asked.

'No, the only disguises we could don that would effectively mislead a mare would need to be created by a demon, and we will not go down that path,' Theo answered, taking the lid off the jam pot to smell it.

'Then what—'

'Shall I show you?' I asked, waggling my eyebrows.

Sarah looked confused. 'Show me what?'

'We tried this last night, in my room. It's pretty slick, really.' I closed the door to the pub area, striking a dramatic pose in the middle of the room.

'You're not going to make it rain again, are you?' Sarah asked, looking worriedly at her raw silk blouse.

'Nope. This is even better than my own personal rain cloud.' I closed my eyes, imagining the humidity creeping up until it was a hundred percent, followed by the temperature dropping below the dew point. Moisture from the surface of the earth was drawn forth and began to evaporate, condensing, moving upward to cool.

'Oh my god,' Sarah said, her voice rife with awe.

I opened my eyes and smiled. 'I'm a fog machine!'

'This is incredible,' she said, batting at the billows of fog that filled the small room. 'I can't believe you can control this!'

'It's an art,' I said modestly, admiring the dense fog that began to obscure the objects in the room.

'And you're going to fill the Court with fog in order to sneak in? Oh, this I have to see!'

I opened a window and began to dissipate the fog.

'Erm…Sarah…I don't think the Court would be the best place for you,' Theo said, looking uncomfortable.

'Why?' she demanded.

'Well, for one, mortals aren't allowed in it except by special dispensation.'

She frowned. 'Portia's mortal.'

Theo glanced at me. 'Yes, but she's a virtue. That means she's on the road to immortality, and can conceivably have legitimate business in the Court.'

'That's splitting hairs, and you know it,' she said, waving away his objections. 'I think I should go with you. No one will see me if it's all foggy, so no one will know I was there.'

'She has a point,' I said, watching Theo. 'We're not supposed to be there either, so what's the difference in her sneaking in along with us? Is there any reason she shouldn't come?'

'Well…'

'Excellent! I'll go get my things,' she said, cramming in the last of her toast before dashing from the room, scattering promises to be back before we knew it.

'If she gets caught—' Theo started to say.

I interrupted him. 'If we get caught, we're going to be in a whole lot more trouble than she will ever be in. So let's go with the thought that we're not going to get caught, and instead focus on the end goal.'

Theo smiled, took my hand, and began nibbling on my fingertips. Little zings of electricity skittered through me at his touch. 'You are so delightfully single-minded. Very well, we will hope for the best.'

There was a faint echo of unease in the back of his mind, but it was too vague for me to pinpoint. Regardless, I was a bit worried as we drove down the coast to the castle in which the entrance to the Court of Divine Blood was located. What if I couldn't perform when the time came? What would happen if Theo and I were caught? Would Sarah be in any trouble if she was seen? What if the Akashic Record didn't help us?

'Too many ifs,' I said to myself.

'What is too manieeee!'

Sarah's screech filled the car, causing me to lurch forward, my hands over my ears, and startling Theo to such extent that the car jerked off the road, bounded over a small hill that ran between the road and the marshy