homemade hat of soft blue yarn was pulled tight to his ears. He took it off as I watched, shifting it and the keys in his grip to his other hand, which held a slick-looking briefcase at odds with his otherwise ragtag attire. His hair was tousled, and he smoothed it with a deft hand while he regained his composure. There was snow on his boots. Unlike his truck.
Keys jingling, he set the briefcase down. He took a breath, then let it slowly out. The guilt in his eyes told me I was right. 'Hi, Ray-ray.'
'Hi, Nick,' I said, hitting the k with an excessive force. 'I guess our date is off.'
Jenks buzzed a greeting, and I hated the apologetic look he gave Nick. Four inches or six-foot-four, they were all in the same club. Nick didn't move to invite me in.
'Was tonight a dump dinner?' I asked abruptly, just wanting to be done with it.
His eyes widened. 'No!' he protested, but his gaze flicked to the briefcase.
'Is it someone else, Nick? 'Cause I'm a big girl. I can take it.'
'No,' he repeated, his voice softer. He shifted, looking frustrated. He reached out, stopping just shy of my shoulder. His hand fell. 'No.'
I wanted to believe him. I really did. 'Then what?' I demanded. Why didn't he invite me in? Why did we have to do this in the freaking hallway?
'Ray-ray,' he whispered, his brow furrowed. 'It's not you.'
My eyes closed as I gathered my strength. How many times had I heard that?
His foot shoved the expensive briefcase into the hall, and my eyes flew open at the scraping sound. I stepped aside as he came out, shutting the door behind him. 'It's not you,' he said, his voice suddenly hard. 'And it wasn't a dump dinner. I don't want to call it quits between us. But something came up, and frankly it's none of your business.'
Surprised, my lips parted. Jenks's words flashed through me. 'You're still afraid of me,' I said, pissed that he didn't trust me to not pull a line through him again.
'I am not,' he offered angrily. Motions stiff, he locked his door from the outside, turning to hold the key up between us. 'Here,' he said belligerently. 'Take my key. I'll be out of town for a while. I was going to give it to you tonight, but since you're here, it will save me the trouble. I've stopped my mail, and the rent is paid up through August.'
'August!' I stammered, suddenly afraid.
He glanced at Jenks. 'Jenks, can Jax come over and watch my plants for me until I get back? He did a good job last time. It might only be a week, but the heat and electricity are on automatic draw in case it's longer.'
'Nick…' I protested, my voice sounding small. How had this turned around so fast?
'Sure,' Jenks said meekly. 'You know, I think I'll go wait downstairs.'
'No, I'm done.' Nick picked up the briefcase. 'I'm going to be busy tonight, but I'll swing by later to pick him up before I leave town.'
'Nick, wait!' I said. My stomach clenched and I felt light-headed. I should've kept my mouth shut. I should've ignored the packed bag and played the stupid girlfriend. I should've gone to dinner and ordered lobster. My first real boyfriend in five years, and finally when things were starting to get back to normal, here I was, scaring him off. Just like all the others.
Jenks made an embarrassed sound. 'Uh, I'll be by the front door,' he said, vanishing down the stairwell to leave a trail of glowing pixy dust all the way to the next landing.
Long face tight in unhappiness, Nick pushed the key into my hand. His fingers were cold. 'I can't—' He took a breath, meeting and holding my eyes. I waited, frightened at what he was going to say. Suddenly, I didn't want to hear it.
'Rachel, I was going to tell you this over dinner, but…I tried. I really did. I just can't do this right now,' he said softly. 'I'm not leaving you,' he rushed to add before I could open my mouth. 'I love you, and I want to be with you. Maybe for the rest of my life. I don't know. But every time you tap a line, I feel it, and it's as if I'm back in that FIB cruiser having an epileptic seizure from the line you pulled through me. I can't breathe. I can't think. I can't do anything. When I'm farther away, it's easier. I need to be away for a while. I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to feel bad.'
Face cold, I could say nothing. He never told me I had made him seize. God help me, I hadn't known. Jenks had been with him. Why hadn't he told me?
'I have to catch my breath,' he whispered, giving my hands a squeeze. 'To go a few days without remembering that.'
'I'll stop,' I said, panicking. 'I won't tap a line again. Nick, you don't have to leave!'
'Yes, I do.' Dropping my hands, he touched my jawline. His smile was pained. 'I want you to pull on a line. I want you to practice. Ley line magic is going to save your life someday, and I want you to become the best damned ley line witch Cincinnati has.' He took a breath. 'But I have to put some distance between us. Just for a while. And I have some business of out of state. It has nothing to do with you. I'll be back.'
But he had said August. 'You're not coming back,' I said, my throat closing. 'You'll come for your books, and then you'll be gone.'
'Rachel—'
'No.' I turned away. The key was cold in my hand, cutting into my palm. Breathe, I reminded myself. 'Just go. I'll bring Jax over tomorrow. Just go.'
I shut my eyes when he put a hand on my shoulder, but I wouldn't turn. They flashed open when he leaned closer and the scent of musty books and new electronics filled me. 'Thank you, Rachel,' he whispered, and there was the lightest touch of lips on mine. 'I'm not leaving you. I'll be back.'
I held my breath and stared at the ugly gray carpet. I wouldn't cry, damn it. I wouldn't.
I heard him hesitate, then the soft thumps of his boots on the stairs. My head started to hurt as the muted rumble of his truck vibrated the window at the end of the hall. I waited until I couldn't hear it anymore before I turned to follow him out, my steps slow and unseeing.
I'd done it again.
Seven
I pulled my car carefully into the tiny garage, turning off the lights and then the engine. Depressed, I stared at the spackled wall two feet in front of the grille. Silence soaked in, broken by the ticking of the engine cooling off. Ivy's bike rested quietly against the side wall, covered in a canvas tarp and stored for the winter. It was going to be dark soon. I knew I should get Jenks inside, but it was hard to find the will to unbuckle my belt and get out of the car.
Jenks dropped to the steering wheel with an attention-getting hum. My hands fell into my lap, shoulders slumping. 'Well, at least you know where you stand now,' he offered.
My frustration flared, then died, overwhelmed by a wave of apathy. 'He said he's coming back,' I said glumly, needing to believe the lie until I hardened myself to the truth.
Jenks wrapped his arms about himself, dragonfly wings still. 'Rache,' he cajoled. 'I like Nick, but you're going to get two calls. One where he says he misses you and is feeling better, and the last when he says he's sorry and asks you to give his key to his landlord for him.'
I looked at the wall. 'Just let me be stupid and believe him for a while, okay?'
The pixy made a sound of wry agreement. He looked positively chilled, his wings almost black as he hunched, shivering. I'd pushed him past his limits by detouring to Nick's. I was definitely going to make cookies tonight. He shouldn't go to sleep cold like that. He might not wake up until spring.
'Ready?' I asked as I opened my bag, and he awkwardly jumped down into it instead of flying. Worried, I debated if I should tuck my bag inside my coat. I settled on putting it in the department store bag and rolling the edges down as far as I could.
Only now did I open the door, being careful not to hit the edge of the garage. Bag in hand, I made my way on the shoveled path to the front door. A sleek black Corvette was parked at the curb, looking out of place and unsafe in the snowy streets. I recognized it as Kisten's, and my face tightened. I'd been seeing too much of him lately for
