and you made a mistake thinking you could.'
'I wanted what she could give me,' Ivy said, curled up into herself. 'Just that much would have been enough. Never again,' she said. 'Never, never, Jenks. She's safe. You're right. I destroy everything I touch.'
I struggled to keep from passing out. She wasn't a monster. 'Ivy?'
Her head jerked up. Her face was white and tracked with tears. 'I thought you were unconscious,' she said, scrambling to her feet and wiping her face.
Blinking, I wavered where I sat. Guilt lay thick on me, and Jenks sat cross-legged by the open door in a patch of sun, a faint, sad smile on him.
She stood in a frozen quandary. 'Are you okay?' she asked, clearly wanting to rush over but afraid to. Between the blood loss and the absurdity of the question, I almost laughed.
'Uh-huh,' I said, giving up on trying to have this make sense. 'Can I have some water?' I whispered, then tipped over.
My neck sent a stab of pain to shock me and I couldn't breathe; my face was buried in the covers. I tried to cry out but was helpless. Damn it, even my arms wouldn't work.
'Oh God,' Ivy said, her hands cold as she pulled me up. I took a grateful breath, trying to focus through the hurt. Jenks was at my feet, and he tugged them down until I was flat on my back and looking up at them with wide eyes, teetering on unconsciousness again now that the adrenaline had played itself out. The asinine relief that I had shaved my legs lifted through me and was gone.
'Here, Dad,' Jax offered, that red straw in his two-fisted grip.
Jenks grabbed that absurdly small cup of water, never sloshing it as he retrieved it from the nightstand. 'She's bleeding again,' he said, his voice and face grim. 'Dust her.'
'Don't give her the water yet.' Ivy was a confusing blur as I tried to focus. 'I've got something to put in it.'
Struggling to keep from passing out, I watched her snatch up her purse and rummage through it. My stomach clenched when she brought out a small vial. 'Brimstone?' I whimpered, waiting for Jenks's protest.
But all I heard was his soft, 'Not so much this time.'
Ivy's oval face scrunched in anger as she unscrewed the top. 'I know what I'm doing.'
Jenks glared at her. 'She's too weak for what you usually give her. She can't eat enough to support that high a metabolism with all the blood you took out of her.'
'And you know all about that, don't you, pixy?' she said sarcastically.
So much for playing nice. Tired, I let my eyes shut while they argued, hoping I didn't die in the interim and make the problem moot. I wasn't ever going to get my water. Ever.
'Rachel?'
It was close and direct. Startled, I opened my eyes. Jenks was kneeling beside the bed with that cup and straw in his hand. Ivy was behind him, her arms crossed over her chest, cheeks spotted with red. Anger and worry warred in her expression. I'd missed something. 'No Brimstone,' I slurred, my hands rising to push it away. My throat tightened as my emotions swung from one extreme to the next. They were so worried about me.
Jenks furrowed his brow, looking too severe for someone so young. 'Don't be stupid, Rache,' he said, catching my arms and easily forcing them down. 'You either take it with Brimstone or you'll be flat on your ass for four weeks.'
He was swearing. I knew I must be doing better. I could smell the water. I couldn't move my arms under his soft restraint, and I felt sick. Why were they making me do this?
I looked at the straw, and taking that as a yes, Jenks slipped it between my lips. Breath held, I sucked it down, thinking the rusty water tasted better than the last cold beer I'd had. Tears started leaking out, my emotions thoroughly out of control. I thought of Ivy doing the same to me, bleeding me dry with that same metallic taste of me in her mouth.
I started to cry, choking on the water. Damn it, what in hell was wrong with me?
'That's enough,' Ivy said softly. Through my watering eyes, I saw her reach out in concern, her hand touching Jenks's shoulder. He jumped, and Ivy pulled away, her face full of an inner pain.
She thought she was a monster. She thought she couldn't touch anyone without ruining them, and I had proved her right.
The enormity of her life's misery fell on me, and I started to shake.
'She's going into shock,' Ivy said, oblivious to the real reason. I'd hurt her. I thought I had been strong enough to survive her, and by failing, I'd hurt her.
Jenks set the cup aside and rose. 'I'll get a blanket.'
'I've got it,' she said, already gone.
My hands fluttered, and I realized I was getting sticky blood all over the bed. They were trying to help, but I didn't deserve it. I wished it had never happened. I had made a mistake, and they were both being so nice about it.
Another tremor shook me. I tried to scrunch up into myself for warmth. His green eyes pinched, Jenks pulled me upright, slipping in behind me. Curving his arms around me, he kept me from shaking apart.
Ivy wasn't pleased. 'What are you doing?' she asked from across the room, her lips pressed tight as she shook out a brown motel blanket.
'I'm keeping her warm.'
Jenks smelled like green things. His arms wrapped around me, and his front pressed into my back. My head was spinning and my neck was a hurting ache. I knew I shouldn't be sitting up like that, but I couldn't remember how to say 'Down.' I think I was still crying, since my face was wet and those noises in the background sort of sounded like me.
Ivy sighed, then came forward. 'She's going to pass out if you keep her head up like that,' she muttered as she draped the blanket over us.
'Pixy dust will hold her together for only so long,' Jenks said softly. 'And I don't want Jax to be fighting the gravity blood flow when he stitches her up.'
My eyes flashed open. Stitches? Crap, not again. I'd just gotten rid of my scars. 'Wait,' I said, panic bringing me stiff at the thought of what it was going to feel like now that the vampire saliva was dormant. 'No stitches. I want my pain amulet.'
They didn't seem to understand me. Ivy bent close, looking at my eyes, not me. 'We could take her to Emergency.'
From behind me, Jenks shook his head. 'The Weres would track us from there. I'm surprised they haven't found us already. I can't believe you bit her. We have four Were packs scenting for our blood, and you think now is a good time to change your relationship?'
'Shut the hell up, Jenks.'
My stomach turned. I wanted my pain amulet. I wasn't a brave person. I'd seen the movie where they stitched up the guy with no anesthetic and bailing wire. It hurt. 'Where's my amulet?' I pleaded, heart pounding. 'Where's Keasley? I want Keasley.'
Ivy pulled away. 'She's going incoherent.' Her brow furrowed, wrinkling her usually placid face. 'Rachel?' she said loudly and with exaggerated slowness. 'Listen to me. You should be stitched. Just four tiny stitches. I didn't rip you. It will be okay.'
'No!' I exclaimed, my vision darkening. 'I don't have my pain amulet!'
Ivy gripped my shoulder through the blanket. Her eyes were full of compassion. 'Don't worry. With your head up like this, you're going to pass out in about three seconds.'
She was right.
Twenty-four
'Jenks, stop picking everything up before you break something,' I said, then drew my hand back from one of the ceramic knickknacks neatly arranged on the store shelves. It was a pumpkin with a little cat beside it, and it reminded me of Rex.
