There was nothing to identify whom it had been, only the terror of being forced into something I desperately didn't want.
My heart was pounding, and I looked up to find Ivy at the far end of the sanctuary, her eyes black as she felt my fear and it triggered her instincts. 'Sorry,' I whispered, holding my breath to get my pulse to slow. Seeing her like that, I wondered how we were going to do this—live in a church together without pressing each other's buttons. That we had been doing this for over a year didn't help. It made things worse.
Ivy grabbed the leftover cake off her piano. Her motions edging into a vampiric quickness, she breezed past me and went into the hall. 'Don't worry about it.'
I listened to my breathing and counted to ten. Fingers slow, I gathered the bowl of jelly beans from my mom's baby-shower game and followed her. I found Ivy leaning against the sink, her expression mildly peeved. The cake was sitting forgotten on the counter.
'Don't screw this up by thinking too hard, Rachel,' she said softly, her voice like silk against the rain. 'The question isn't if we can do this. It's can we live with ourselves if we don't try.' She looked up, her eyes a steady brown, but there was a hint of hurt in them. 'Don't apologize every time you feel something and accidentally jerk me around. It makes me feel like you've done something wrong. You haven't. You're just being you. Let me take my share of the responsibility. Just give me time to collect myself. Okay? And maybe start wearing your perfume again.'
I blinked, shocked that she was actually talking to me instead of running away. 'Okay. Yeah. Sure. Um, sorry.'
She snorted at that, and clearly wanting to drop it, she found the tinfoil and started wrapping up the leftover cake. It seemed different now, as we silently went about the business of cleaning up the kitchen, both of us not quite walking on eggshells, but peaceful almost, knowing nothing was ever going to happen between us and we could just concentrate on getting along. But when things loosened up into a casual comfort was when I usually had the most trouble with relationships. Sighing, I turned at the sound of pixy wings in the hall.
'Hey, I think Al's here,' Jenks said as he hovered between us, and a spike of fear slid through me and was gone. Ivy took a slow breath, but she was smiling as her softly dilating pupils met mine.
'I can't see him, but the air got about three degrees colder in that ley line,' Jenks added, then hesitated, his expression going wary when he noticed we were a careful eight feet apart. 'Did I interrupt something?' he asked warily.
'No,' I blurted. What is Al doing here? I thought I had tonight off. 'Is it still raining?'
Ever the observant pain-in-the-ass, Jenks flew a circle around Ivy. 'Are you sure?' he persisted, laughing. ''Cause it looks like—'
'No,' I reiterated as I started for the back door, anticipation of the unknown running through me. Who would have thought I'd ever go into the ever-after willingly. 'Ivy and I were discussing how I need to go talk to Ford. See if I can remember anything new.'
Ivy was right behind me with Mr. Fish. I opened the door to find the rain had settled into a fine mist. I glanced at the Betta, then her. 'Uh, Ivy?'
'Take your fish,' she said, eyes low as she shoved it at me. 'Use him like a canary. If he can handle the toxicity of the ever-after, then you can.'
Knowing it would be easier to just accept the fish than argue, I took him. A sneeze ripped through me, and I almost spilled the bowl. 'I'm coming!' I shouted, knowing Al was trying to hurry me up. Like the weather wasn't enough of a goad?
Jenks was tight by my ear as I waved one finger at the empty-seeming garden. I couldn't see Al without bringing up my second sight, but he could probably see me. 'So you want me to make an appointment for you with Ford?' Jenks asked uncertainly.
Oh, yeah. I squinted, considering it. I wanted to know who'd killed Kisten and tried to bind me, but it was as scary as all hell. Reading on the damp night that the pain was still too fresh, Ivy shook her head and spoke. 'Let me see what I can find out my way first. Someone must know something.'
A twinge of fear for her joined the fear for myself. 'No, I can do this,' I said. 'Whoever did it is an undead, and it's a lot safer for me to spend a couple of hours on the couch with Ford than for you to poke around in the affairs of the undead.'
Ivy's perfect face scrunched up in protest, but before she could say anything, I sneezed again. Damn it, I'm coming!
On Ivy's shoulder, Jenks harrumphed. 'Like Ivy has ever had a problem poking around underground? We'll be fine. Kisten didn't have me watching his back.'
Together they made a determined picture, and I sighed. 'Okay,' I said, giving in, then sneezed once more. 'I gotta go.' Impatient bastard. This was as bad as your date sitting in the drive and beeping a horn. I hated that, too.
I adjusted my grip on Mr. Fish and started down the stairs in the rain. The smell of the dying garden was strong, and my ankles went damp. Behind me, I heard Jenks ask something and Ivy mutter a soft, 'I'll tell you later.'
'Sorry about leaving you with a mess, guys!' I shouted over my shoulder. God, I felt like I was going off to camp.
'Don't worry about it.'
Ahead of me was the line, and as I approached, I let my second sight come into play. Sure enough, Al was standing in it, his coattails shifting as he fidgeted impatiently. The rain wasn't touching him, and he made an inquiring face when I stopped just shy of the line and turned for one last look at the church. It wasn't fear that pulled me around, it was satisfaction.
There was a reddish haze over the church from the overlay of the ever-after, but because I wasn't in the line yet, I could still see Ivy and Jenks standing on the back steps, just at the edge of the rain. Ivy had an arm wrapped about her middle, letting it drop when she saw me look at her. She wouldn't wave, but I knew the thought was there and that she and Jenks would worry while I was gone. Jenks was a shifting drop of silver light from this distance, resting on her shoulder and probably telling her a bad joke full of sexual innuendos. They had found strength together, and I would be back.
I gave them a wave, and with a new confidence in my steps, I tucked my hair behind my ear and turned back to Al. The demon was waiting impatiently, and he made a rather rude gesture, as if he was wondering what my problem was. I smiled, thinking the next twenty-four hours were going to be like no other. Sure, I was going off to the ever-after, but I wasn't scared.
I was free of any favor owed to Newt, confident she would let me be until I went looking for her—like that would ever happen. I had made a hellacious deal with a demon, but the reward was just as great; those I loved were safe, as was I. With Jenks's help, I'd stolen something that no one in the history of the ever-after had, and I survived the fallout. I had saved Trent's lousy little elf ass, and with a bit of luck, I might survive that, too. Ceri's baby, and by association the entire elf species, was going to thrive. But that wasn't the best thing. The best thing was what I was leaving behind, knowing I'd be back.
I had my church. I had my friends. I had a mother who loved me, and a dirtbag sort-of-father who was going to make her happy again. So what if my kids, if I had any, would be demons? Maybe my mother was right. Maybe there was someone out there for me who would understand that there was good stuff to balance out the bad. And maybe by the time I found someone like that, I'd be so kick-ass that no one, not even Newt herself, would dare lay a finger on us.
For the first time in a long time, I knew who I was and where I was going. And right now, I was going…this way. Happily into the ever-after.
Acknowledgements
I'd like to thank Mike Spradlin, not just for the idea of the title, but for his longtime support of the Hollows, precious in those first tender years and still greatly appreciated. And as always, my agent, Richard Curtis, and my editor, Diana Gill, whose combined attention and skill in bringing a world to life are prized all the more.
