jeans, boots, and a ratty jacket. He smelled, oddly, of old cooking grease.
“Well, hey there, son,” Helton greeted. “Ain’t you one’a Cork McKellen’s kids?”
“Yes, sir, Mr. Tuckton,” the boy said with pride. “I’se
Helton squinted. “Well that’s dang nice’a yer Paw to send me a package, but—”
“Oh, no sir, it’s weren’t my daddy sent it. I was just asked to bring it to ya.”
The prospect of a package was, indeed, interesting, especially in this time of low-spirits. But Helton for the life of him couldn’t understand.
“So if’n it ain’t from your daddy,” Micky-Mack posed to the boy, “who’s it from?”
The young lad of 12 or so explained, quite long-windedly, “Well, see, I got me this job in Luntville, working how they call ‘under the table’ at the Wendy’s. What I do, see, is I clean the toilets”—which he pronounced as
”Well, that’s mighty enterprisin’ of ya, Trucker,” Helton complimented, but it was difficult to stay his frustration ’cos he couldn’t see what cleanin’ a grease-pit at a hamburger restaurant had to do with this
The boy continued, seemingly vibrant in some inexplicable nervous excitement. “That’s what I’se fixin’ ta say, sir, ’cos, see, after I finished cleanin’ the pit, my shift is over so’s I go outside to start a-walkin’ home when, when…”
“When
The boy seemed in a dreamy fog, “…when I look up at this great rumblin’ sound, and what it is, see, is the biggest, fanciest white motor-home I ever seed comin’ rollin’ down the road past the Pip Boys Cleaners and the Qwik-Mart and that place with the sign that say Relax At June’s which I heared is what they call a ‘jack shack’ on account men go in there and pay ladies to play with their willies whilst they stuck a finger up their butts I guess ’cos—”
“Son, son,” Helton interrupted. “You shore have a roundabout way’a tellin’ us ’bout this package. Who done give it to ya?”
“Yes, sir, I was gettin’ to that—”
“Well try gettin’ to it a little faster,” Dumar said because he, like the others, was
Trucker McKellen nodded, “Yes, sir, I’se will. But…dang…” The lad scratched his head. “I’se cain’t seem to remember what I were sayin’!”
“A motor-home!” Helton nearly yelled.
“Oh, yeah, yes sir, it were that motor-home I tolt ya about, all shiny white’n
“Dang, boy!” Helton finally barked. “Tell us about the fuckin’ package!”
“Oh, yes, sir, that’s what I’m fixin’ ta do,” the boy laboriously continued. “But see, these fellas, they
“Trucker,” Micky-Mack asked, “was it these citified fellas who done give you this package?”
“Oh, yeah, that’s what I been meanin’ to tell yawl. They waves at me after they get out’a that big white fancy motor-home, then they walk over, and they’re all real nice’n smilin’ and they ask me if I ever heard of Helton Tuckton.”
At this data, Helton’s eyes narrowed. “That so?”
“Yes, sir, they ask me if’n I heard’a ya so’s a’course I say yes sir, and then one’a the city men, he step up and say that he’s a friend’a yours and he got a
Dumar and Helton looked at each other.
“—so I’se say, yes sir, down the old trail off’a Dog Tail Road past the deadfall about a mile, but then I tell ’em that that road ain’t big enough for that big fancy motor-home see, so then this fella, real nice fella, I mean ta say, all of ’em, that is, but this fella ask me since he cain’t drive his fancy motor-home to yer house, could I take this here package to ya directly, so I say yes sir, and you know what he done? He done give me a hunnert dollars for doin’ it!”
Helton went into some deep contemplation. Something just didn’t sound right about this. “Trucker, you say this city fella paid you a hunnert dollars to deliver this package to
“Yes, sir, that’s a fact.”
“And you say that he says he’s a
“Oh, yes, sir, he say you’re a good friend’a his, for shore—oh, oh—and he even tolt me his name. He said his name is
Helton stood stunned. His son and his nephew peered at him.
“Well, I cain’t think of a city fella who’s a friend’a mine,” Helton gave voice to the puzzle. “Ain’t never known no
“Well shit on all’a that, Paw,” Dumar suggested. He was tired of all this talk.
“Could be someone ya forgot, Unc Helton,” Micky-Mack added.
“Let’s just see what it is that this fella Paulie sent ya,” Dumar said. “Then you’ll shorely remember him.”
“Yeah, I guess’n yer right.” He looked to young Trucker McKellen. “I thank ya kindly for walkin’ all that way with this package, son. But you best git on home now, and think ’bout how you’re gonna spend them hunnert dollars.”
“Oh, I will, sir,” the boy said. “I reckon I’ll give it to my daddy on account he work so hard and still ain’t got over my mama up’n leavin’…” Trucker looked at the five $20 bills. “Or, dang, maybe I’ll just give
“Ain’t no reason not to,” Micky-Mack said. “It’s
Now the boy’s brows rose in an anticipation. “Mr. Helton, you think for maybe fifty dollars one’a them ladies at June’s would stick her finger up my butt while’se playin’ with
Helton winced. “Aw, son, now we don’t wanna hear ’bout none’a that—”
“—and sometimes my daddy’d come in and then he’d—”
“That’s enough, Trucker. Just you run on home now,” Helton insisted, and then, after a polite if not crude farewell, the boy was gone.
“Jesus,” Helton muttered.
Dumar’s face was all lit up. “Come on, Paw! Let’s see what’s in the
Helton whipped out his Buck knife and zipped it through the clear packing tape. He opened the box, looked inside, and withdrew…
“Another package,” he muttered.
Sure enough, there was another box inside the first box, but this one had—
“What’s all that writin’ on the box, Unc Helton?” inquired Micky-Mack.
“Yeah,” Dumar said, “I cain’t read for
Helton put on an ancient pair of spectacles and, squinting at the box, slowly recited: “M-a-g-n-a-v-o-x…p-o-r-