She blew out an exasperated breath. 'For how low-maintenance Alejandro is, he drives me fucking crazy sometimes.'
I dropped the keys on the counter, mostly to stall. I waited until I could at least feign casualness. 'Does the good outweigh the bad?'
'In the relationship? Yes. I mean, for starters he's gorgeous.'
'He's not that gorgeous.'
'He's better-looking than you' She smiled at my mock indignation. 'Don't pout-that's hardly news. And he's nice enough. Heart of a golden retriever.'
'And the mind of a goldfish.' I relented under her look. 'Okay. At times he's pleasingly good-natured.'
'So he's gorgeous-'
'You'd mentioned that.'
'I'm working to a point here.' She was smiling. 'But no matter how good-looking they are, you stop noticing. After a while you get this
… disdain for their familiarity. Sweat stains on their shirts. Hair-gel blobs on the countertop. Open mouth when they sleep. I never had that with you. No part of you was dirty to me. Was it me? Was it just me?'
My hands were balled, and I was unaccountably cold. I could catch the faintest scent of her perfume-Jo Malone Orange Blossom. 'No,' I said. 'It wasn't just you.'
'But that wasn't enough for you.' Glow from a garden light fell through the back window, catching her face in a pale yellow band. There were so many things I wanted to tell her, but before I could find the shape of them, she continued, 'Despite the problems, Alejandro's always there when I need him. This relationship-it works for me.'
'Does it?' I asked. 'How?'
'With all my money, everyone wanting something, I guess I want to hold some part of myself safe. Where no one can touch it. With him there's never that risk.' Her voice was soft, even vulnerable, but her stare was as level as ever. 'I learned that from you.'
I crossed to her. She bobbed a bit on the cushion when I sat next to her. I said, 'That's the last example I'd want to set.'
'Well, you set it. With me. Over and over.'
I said, 'I'm sorry.'
'I made my own choices. I'm not looking for an apology.'
'That doesn't mean I don't owe you one.'
She bit her lip, waved me off. Her eyes glimmered a bit, or maybe it was just the way the glow caught her face.
I felt a black hole where my stomach was supposed to be. I would've done anything to rewrite the past, but here we were, with her upset and me wanting to say something-anything-that would help. 'I'm sorry your date went badly.'
'I wouldn't call it a date.'
'Oh.' My face grew hot. 'Uh-oh.'
'He took me to Hooters. I mean, Hooters. And you know what his big surprise was? Chicken wings. I'm a vegetarian, for Christ's sake. I don't care that it's not some elegant restaurant-I mean, pack a sandwich and take me to the beach. Something that shows you've been remotely paying attention to who I am.'
I found my cuticle suddenly fascinating. 'I… um-'
'I asked him what the hell he was thinking, but he wouldn't say anything.' She looked over at me, noting my discomfort. 'What. '
'I may be partially at fault here.'
Her gaze hardened. 'Talk.'
I would have done anything to avoid copping to my smart-ass role in their failed date. There was no way to come clean without revealing my feelings for her. But I owed it to her, and to Alejandro.
I cleared my throat self-consciously. 'He asked me for advice on what to do for your anniversary, and I… uh, I told him where to take you. Half joking. I'd like to say that it got lost in translation, but I was also half not-joking, I guess.'
She glowered for a moment, then cracked up.
When she finished laughing, she wiped her eyes and said, 'Why would you do that?'
My face burned. If I could have curled up and disappeared, I would have been long gone. I leaned forward, elbows on my knees, and stared at the blank screen of the TV.
She said, 'Oh, Nick.' Her voice was empathetic and disappointed all at once.
Then she rose and headed up for bed.
Chapter 35
I woke up on Induma's couch, Egyptian cotton sheets twisted around me. Hot. Last night I'd closed and locked the windows overlooking the backyard and the canal beyond.
The cell phone, propped right by my face, showed no messages. I was impatient for Steve to get back to me with information on Baby Everett. Bilton's crew had every reason to go full bore until they found her. If they hadn't found her already.
I showered in the downstairs bathroom, dressed, and swapped out the Band-Aid on my cheek. Sitting on the toilet with the rucksack at my feet, I removed five hundreds from my money clip and slid them imperfectly beneath the purple band of one of the cash bundles, replacing the bills I'd given to Homer. It had been bugging me since yesterday, and I was glad I could make up that money. Whoever's it was, I didn't want to owe them.
I stared at my cell phone for a while. No missed calls. If Bilton's henchmen were after Baby Everett, every passing minute gave them another chance to close in.
I dialed.
When I came out of the bathroom, Induma had old-fashioned bacon and eggs sizzling in one pan, soy sausages in the other. On the counter a bottle of OJ and an intimidating stack of pancakes.
'Are these some of those exotic Bangalore eggs?' I asked.
'Airlifted this morning.'
'And the bacon?'
'Family recipe from the Mahatma himself.'
'I thought he was a vegetarian.'
'Eat your damn breakfast, honky.'
'I think only black people are allowed to say 'honky.''
'What are Indian people allowed to call you?'
'Non-engineer.'
'Clever, for a fugitive.' She slid my plate across the counter.
When we were done eating, I helped Induma clean up, then put on my rucksack. She eyed it, looking worried.
I said, 'I can't wait any longer. I've got to find Baby Everett, get word to her, something.'
'You don't think Steve'll be able to find her?'
'Maybe not in time.' I took a breath. 'That's why I called Caruthers.'
'You called Caruthers?'
'His aide. Alan Lambrose-the bow4ied conduit. Caruthers just flew down from Sacramento, and he can see me in an hour. He offered to help when I met him. If anyone'11 know how to locate a person…'
'We still don't know for sure that Caruthers isn't implicated in some other way. Trying to outbid Bilton for the ultrasound, whatever.'
'This'11 be his test, I guess. If he has his guys grab me, we'll know he's implicated.'
'Nick. You're wanted. Caruthers ought to have his agents arrest you regardless.'
'Alan checked. He said there's no arrest warrant out on me.'
