know what? I slept with her last month.»
«With your former wife?»
«Yup. Do you think that's normal?»
«I don't think it's abnormal,» I said.
«She came here, I couldn't figure out what for. She rings up, wants to drop by. Of course, I say. So we're drinking, the two of us, just like old times, and we end up in bed together. It was great. She told me she still liked me and I told her how I wished we could start all over again. But she didn't say anything to that. She just listened and smiled. I started going on about having a normal life, a regular home, like I was telling you now. And she listened and smiled, but she wasn't really listening. She didn't hear a word of it. It was like talking to a wall. Futile. She was feeling lonely and wanted to be with someone. I happened to be available. Not a nice thing to say about yourself, but it's true. She's a world apart from somebody like you or me. For her, loneliness is something you have others remove for you. And once it's gone, everything's okay. Doesn't go any further. I can't live that way.»
The record finished. He raised the cartridge and stood thinking in silence for a moment.
«What do you think about calling in some girls?» he asked.
«Fine by me. Whatever you want,» I said.
«You never bought a woman?» he asked.
Never, I told him.
«How come?»
«Never occurred to me,» I said, honestly.
Gotanda shrugged his shoulders. «Well tonight, I think you should. Play along with me, okay?» he said. «I'll ask for the girl who came with Kiki. She might know something about her.»
«I leave it up to you,» I said. «But don't tell me you can write it off as expenses.»
He laughed as he refilled his glass. «You won't believe it, but I can. There's a whole system. This place has this front as a party service, so they can make out these very legitimate receipts. Sex as 'business gifts and entertainment.' Amazing, huh?»
«Advanced capitalism,» I said.
While waiting for the girls to arrive, Kiki and her fabulous ears came to mind. I asked Gotanda if he'd ever seen them.
«Her ears?» he said, puzzled. «No, I don't think so. Or if I did, I don't remember. What about her ears?»
Oh, nothing, I told him.
It was past twelve when the girls arrived. One was Gotanda's stunningly beautiful companion to Kiki. And really, she was stunning. The sort of woman who'd linger in your memory even if she never spoke a word to you. Not glitter and glamour, but refinement. Under her coat she wore a green cashmere sweater and an ordinary wool skirt. Simple earrings, no other adornment. Very well-bred university girl.
The other woman wore glasses and a soft-colored dress. She wasn't beautiful like her companion. She was more what you would call appealing and fresh. With long legs and slender arms, and tan as if she'd spent the last week on the beach in Guam. Her hair was short and neatly pinned up. She wore silver bangles that played on her wrists with her brisk movements, her flesh trim and taut, like a sleek carnivore.
Memories of high school came to mind. These two distinct types were to be found in any class. The elegant beauty and the quick-witted mink. It was like being at a reunion. Especially with Gotanda there, so relaxed and effervescent. He seemed to have slept with both of them before, so it was all, «Hey there, how's it going?» Gotanda introduced me as a former schoolmate, now a writer. Both smiled warmly, fine-we're-all-friends-here smiles.
We sat on the floor with brandy-and-sodas, Joe Jackson and the Alan Parsons Project playing in the background. Gotanda put on his dentist act for the girl with the glasses. Then he whispered something to her and she giggled. Then the Beauty was leaning on my shoulder and holding my hand. Her scent was lovely. She was every man's, every boy's dream. The high school girl you'd always wanted, now come back years later. /
«Undress me nice and slow,» she whispered into my ear. So I took off first her sweater, then her skirt, then her blouse and stockings. Out of reflex I almost started to fold her things, but then realized that in this scene there was no need to do that. She in turn undressed me. Armani tie, Levi's, T-shirt.
She stood before me in scanty bra and panties. «Well, what do you think?» she asked with a smile.
«Super,» I said. She had a beautiful body. Full, brimming with life, clean and sexy.
«
«It's like old times. Takes me back to high school.» I was being honest.
She squinted curiously, then smiled. «Unique, I'll say that.»
«Did I say something wrong?»
«Not at all,» she said. Then she came over next to me and did things nobody in my thirty-four years had ever done for me. Delicate, yet daring, things you wouldn't think of so readily. But somebody obviously had. The tension slipped out of my body as I closed my eyes, giving myself over to the flow of sensations. This was utterly different from any sex I'd known before.
«Not bad, huh?» she said, whispering again.
«Not bad,» I agreed.
It put my mind at ease, like the best music, released the pockets of tension from my being, sent my temporal senses into limbo. Instead, there was a quiet intimacy, a blending of time and space, a perfect self-contained form of communication. And to think it was tax deductible! «Not bad,» I said again. What was Dylan going on about now? «A Hard Rain's A-Gonna Fall.» She snuggled into the crook of my arm. What a world, where you can sleep with gorgeous women while listening to Bob Dylan and then write off the whole works! Unthinkable in the sixties.
It's all just images, I found myself thinking. Pull out the plug and it'll all go away. A 3-D sex scene. Complete with eau de cologne, soft touchie-feelies, hot breath.
I followed the expected course, I came, then we took a shower. We returned to the living room, wrapped in oversized towels, to listen to Dire Straits and sip some brandy.
She asked me about my work, what kind of things I wrote. I explained briefly and she said, how uninteresting. Well, it depends, I told her. What I did was shovel cultural snow. To which she responded that her work was to shovel sensual snow. I had to laugh. But wouldn't I like to shovel some more snow, right about now? And so we rolled over on the carpet and made love again, this time very simply, very slowly. And she knew just how to please me. Uncanny.
Later, both lying full-length in Gotanda's luxurious tub, I asked her about Kiki.
«Kiki?» she said. «Now there's a name I haven't heard in a while. You know Kiki?»
She pursed her lips like a child and tried to think. «She's not anywhere now. She just disappeared, all of a sudden. We were pretty close too. Sometimes we'd go out shopping or drinking together. Then, without warning, she was gone. A month, maybe two months ago. But that's not so unusual. You don't need to hand in a formal resignation in this line of work. If you want to quit, you quit. You don't have to tell anyone. I'm sorry she left. We were friends, but that's how it goes. We're not girl scouts, after all,» she said, stroking my thighs and cock with her long graceful fingers. «Have you slept with Kiki?»
«There was a time we lived together. Four years ago.» «Four years ago?» she said with a smile. «That's ancient history. Four years ago, I was still in high school.»
«Hmm.» I let it pass. «You know of any way I could get
to see Kiki?»
«Pretty difficult, I'd say. I honestly don't have any idea where she went. It's like I told you, she just up and left. Practically vanished into a blank wall. Haven't a clue how you'd go about looking for her. So, you still got a
