Dance Dance Dance

had been a dream, fantasy, illusion. Cuck-koo. But Yumiyoshi existed in the real world. Her warmth and weight and vital­ity were real. I caressed her and held her.

Gotanda's fingers trailing down Kiki's back was also illu­sion. It was acting, light flickering on a screen, a shadow slipping between one world and another. It was not reality. Cuck-koo.

My real fingers were stroking Yumiyoshi's real skin. Yumiyoshi buried her face in my neck. I felt the touch of her nose. I searched out every part of her body. Shoulder, elbow, wrist, palm, the tips of ten fingers. My fingers explored and my lips kissed. Her breasts, her stomach, her sides and back and legs, each form registered and sealed. I needed to be sure. I ran my fingers over her pubis. I moved down and kissed it. Cuck- koo.

We did not speak. We held each other. Her breath was warm and wet. Words that were not words hung in the air. I entered her. I was hard, very hard, and full of desire.

Toward climax, Yumiyoshi bit my arm, enough to draw blood. The pain was real. I held her hips and slowly eased into ejaculation. Ever so slowly, sure not to miss a step.

At seven I woke her. «Yumiyoshi, time to get up,» I said.

She opened her eyes and looked at me. Then slid out of bed like a fish and stood naked in the morning light. She seemed full of new life, alive. I propped myself on my pillow and admired her. The body I'd registered and sealed a few hours before.

Yumiyoshi showered and brushed her hair with my brush and got dressed. I watched her put on each article of cloth­ing, the care she took doing up each button. Her blazer was next, then she checked in the mirror for wrinkles. She was very serious about these things. Her attitude said «morn­ing.» «My makeup is down in my locker,» she announced.

«You're beautiful as you are,» I said.

«Thanks. But makeup is a part of the job. I don't have a choice.»

I gave Yumiyoshi a hug. It was so good to hold her with her glasses and blazer on.

«You still want me, now that it's morning?» she asked.

«I still want you,» I said. «I want you more than I wanted you yesterday.»

«I've never had anyone want me so much before.»

«No one's ever wanted you?»

«Not the way you do,» she said. «It's like being in a nice, warm room. Nice and cozy.»

«Well, stay put. There's no reason ever to leave.»

«Are you going to stay put?»

«Yes, I'm going to stay put.»

Yumiyoshi pulled back a bit. «Can I come stay with you again tonight?»

«Absolutely. But aren't the risks too high? Wouldn't it be better if I went to your place or stayed in another hotel?»

«No,» she said, «I like it here. This is your place, and it's

also my place. I want to make love with you here. That is, if

it's all right with you.»

«I want to make love with you wherever you like.» «Okay, I'll see you this evening. Here.» Then she cracked

the door open and slipped away.

I felt happy. Yes, I felt happy. And then I wondered if, maybe, it was time to give up the shoveling habit. Do some writing for myself for a change. Without the deadlines. Something for myself. Not a novel or anything. But some­thing for myself.

44

Yumiyoshi came back at six-thirty. Still in uniform, al­though her blouse was different. She'd brought a bag with a change of clothes and toiletries and cosmetics.

«I don't know,» I said. «They're going to find out some time.»

«Don't worry, I'm not careless,» she said, then smiled and draped her blazer over the back of a chair.

Then we sat on the sofa and held each other tight.

«I've thought about you all day long,» she said. «You know, wouldn't it be wonderful if I could work during the daytime, then sneak into your room at night? We'd spend the night together, then in the morning I'd go straight to work?»

«A home convenient to your workplace,» I joked. «Unfortunately I couldn't keep footing the tab to this room. And sooner or later, they'll find out about us.»

«Nothing goes smoothly in this world.»

«You can say that again.»

«But it'd be okay for a few more nights, wouldn't it?»

«I imagine that's what's going to happen.»

«Good. I'll be happy with those few days. Let's both stay in this hotel.»

Then she undressed, neatly folding each article of cloth­ing. She removed her watch and her glasses, and placed them

on the table. Then we enjoyed an hour of lovemaking, until we were both exhausted. No better kind of exhaustion.

«Mmm,» was Yumiyoshi's appraisal. Then she snuggled up in my arms for a nap. After a while, I got up, showered, then drank a beer. I sat, admiring Yumiyoshi's sleeping face. She slept so nice.

A little before eight, she awoke, hungry. We ordered a sandwich and pasta au gratin from room service. Mean­while, she stored her things in the closet, and when the bell­hop knocked, she hid in the bathroom. We ate happily.

«I've been thinking about it all afternoon,» I began, pick­ing up from our earlier conversation. «There's nothing for me in Tokyo anymore. I could move up here and look for work.»

«You'd live here?» «That's right, I'd live here,» I said.

«I'll rent an apartment and start a new life here. You can come over whenever you want to. You can spend the night if you feel like it. We can try it out like that for a while. But I've got the feeling it's going to work out. It'll bring me back to reality. It'll give you space to relax. And it'll keep us together.»

Yumiyoshi smiled and gave me a big kiss. «Fantastic!» «What comes later, I don't know. But I've got a good feel­ing about it. Like I said.»

«Nobody knows what's going to happen in the future. I'm not worried about that. Right now, it's just fantastic! Oooh, the best kind of fantastic!»

I called room service for a bucket of ice, making Yumiyoshi hide in the bathroom again. And while she was in there, I took out the bottle of vodka and tomato juice I'd bought in town that afternoon and made us two Bloody Marys. No lemon slices or Lea & Perrins, but bloody good enough. We toasted. To us. I switched on the bedside Muzak and punched the Pops channel. Soon we were treated to the lush strains of Mantovani playing «Strangers in the Night.»

You didn't hear me making snide comments.

«You think of everything,» said Yumiyoshi. «I was just dreaming of a Bloody Mary right about now. How did you know?»

«If you listen carefully, you can hear these things. If you look carefully, you'll see what you're after.»

«Words of wisdom?»

«No, just words. A way of life in words.»

«You ought to specialize in inspirational writing.»

We had three Bloody Marys each. Then we took our clothes off and gently made love again.

At one point, in the middle of our lovemaking, I thought I could hear that old Dolphin Hotel elevator cr-cr-crr-creaking up the shaft. Yes, this place was the knot, the node. Here's where it all tied together and I was a part of it all. Here was reality, I didn't have to go further. I was already there. All I had to