14
Bobby Rayburn said: “Whenever I get headache pain, I just knock it out of the park with extra-strength Moprin.”
“Fantastic, Bobby,” came a voice from the other side of the bright lights, “DeNiro couldn’t have done it any better. And I worked with him when he was in his prime. Personally. So on this one let’s just try holding the product up the weensiest bit higher. Right about thereabouts. Absolument perfecto. Ready, everybody?”
“Rolling.”
“Speed.”
“Take nine.”
“Anytime you want, Bobby.”
Bobby said: “Whenever I get headache pain, I just knock it out of the park with new extra-strength Moprin.”
“Oscar time, folks. That’s a keeper if I ever… new? He said new? So? Where the hell doesn’t it say new? Stronger that way if you want my hum-”
Whispers.
“All right, everybody. Bobby. The account folks here say we’ve got to lose the new for some reason, FDA blah blah blah, although personally I like it better and think they should be grateful for your creativity, end of bracket, so this time let’s try it sans new, and with the product up nice and high where the art director likes it.”
“Sans new?” said Bobby.
“They don’t want you to say new,” said Wald, also invisible behind the lights.
“I said new?”
“Thank you so much, Mr. Wald. I’ll handle this. Everything’s okay, Bobby. Better than okay. I loved it. We all loved it. But this time let’s just stick to what’s on that tedious old screen.”
“Can he see it from there?”
“Can you see the screen, Bobby?”
“Yes.”
“What a question, with his eyesight. In hindsight. All right, now. In fact, it’s a gas. Ready, everybody?”
“Rolling.”
“Speed.”
“Take ten.”
Bobby said: “Whenever I get headache pain, I just knock it out of the tarp with extra-strength Moprin.”
Silence.
“Tarp?”
“They do that shit for a living?” said Bobby when it was over, and he and Wald were on the plane.
“A good living,” said Wald.
“I hate it,” Bobby said. He hated the way they treated him like an idiot, hated New York, hated planes. He liked only that it was an off-day. Still learning: today he had learned that off-days were good when you were batting. 147 at the beginning of June.
“How do you feel about the four hundred grand?” asked Wald.
“Is that what I’m getting?”
“Less my percentage.”
Bobby shrugged. “Easiest money I ever made.”
“Is it?” said Wald.
The flight attendant appeared. “More champagne, Mr. Wald?”
Wald had more champagne. Bobby had a Coke: no booze until he shook the slump.
“What did you mean by that?” said Bobby.
“By what?”
“When you said, ‘is it?’ ”
“Just making conversation, Bobby.”
The plane landed. They hadn’t even reached the end of the covered ramp before Wald’s phone buzzed. He took it out of his pocket, said, “Yes,” listened, said, “I’ll get back to you,” clicked off.
“Interesting,” he said.
Bobby looked beyond the gate for Val. She was supposed to meet him.
“That was Jewel Stern,” Wald said.
“Who?”
“Radio reporter. You met her down in spring training.”
Bobby tried to remember.
“In her forties. Attractive. She wants to do a piece on you for the New York Times Magazine. ”
Bobby spotted Val, hurrying in with a ponytailed man. “You’re telling her to forget it, right?”
“Might not hurt to meet her,” Wald said.
“Why, for Christ’s sake?”
“The Sunday magazine. A lot of important people read it.”
“So what?”
Val was coming forward, a big smile on her face.
Wald shrugged. “Baseball’s not forever, Bobby.”
“What does that mean?”
Val threw her arms around him. “I’m so glad you’re back, Bobby.” He’d only been gone for the day. “I want you to meet Philip.” The ponytailed man stepped forward. “Philip’s got the most exciting ideas.”
“About what?” Bobby said, shaking hands.
Philip opened his mouth to explain, but Val beat him to it: “The kitchen, Bobby.”
“What kitchen?”
“Our new kitchen, of course. Philip has a whole new approach. He’s an architect, Bobby. Famous.”
“What’s wrong with it the way it is?” Not that Bobby liked the kitchen, particularly, but he knew the fault must be his. How could it be otherwise with its terra-cotta floor, granite countertops, stained-glass windows from a church in some town he’d vaguely heard of?
A kid moved toward them, pencil and paper in hand. “Why don’t we talk about it over dinner?” Val said.
“That sounds perfect,” said Philip. “How about Fellini’s?”
“Have you ever been hypnotized?” the sports psychologist asked Bobby.
“No.”
“It can be very useful in imaging therapy.”
“Therapy?” said Bobby.
“Imaging training,” said the sports psychologist. “A kind of workout. No abracadabra, no Bela Lugosi business. Nothing but science, applied to the mind.”
“What do I do?”
“I just want you to relax, deeply. Deeply, deeply, deeply.” The sports psychologist’s voice deepened and softened with each repetition of the word. “Release the tension from the core of every muscle, from the marrow of every bone, from the nucleus of every brain cell.” Long pause. “If you feel inclined, turn your gaze to the painting on the wall.”
“With the cows?”
“And the farmhouse. Perhaps you’d like to watch the glow of the hearth fire, just visible through that window beside the deep-crimson shutter.”
Pause, perhaps long, perhaps not.
“Bobby?”
“Yes.”
“Can you hear me?”
“Yes.”
