“Sorry, Josephs.”
“Hey, man, that’s okay.” He wiped his lip with a towel.
“Tell me about Natasha.”
“It must have been a year ago. Back then I was all jazzed to arrest an offworlder. I’d only arrested Lagartans up to that point, and I thought it would look good on my record to have a few offworld collars. I got all dressed up, got my clothes ironed and everything. Then I hit some of the nice restaurants near the Town Square, you know, the touristy places. I’d hang out in the bar and wait for an offworlder to proposition a hooker. Didn’t have to wait long.”
Josephs wiped his lip again. This time it came away clean, and he tossed it on the floor. “You ever been in a restaurant called Afrie’s?”
“Yeah.” That’s where I’d met her.
“Your Natasha was there with two other hookers. They didn’t look like hookers though. I thought they were just out partyin’ together. There was also this group of five miners there. The two groups were makin’ eyes at each other, then the miners started sendin’ drinks over. One of the miners went over and sat with Natasha and her friends. You should’ve seen this dude. He had this fish skin-you know, scales and shit. They was all into touchin’ it, seein’ how it felt. He was turnin’ it on and off. One second he’s a fuckin’ fish, and the next, he’s a normal person. Natasha and her friends were oohin’ and ahin’ like schoolgirls. At this point, I wasn’t suspicious at all. I’m thinkin’ it’s just some innocent flirtin’, but then he goes back to his table, and the five of them pool together a bundle of cash. Then the guy goes back over to Natasha’s table and leaves the money with a hotel key. I followed them to the hotel and busted the whole lot. All eight of them.”
“You’re sure we’re talking about the same Natasha?”
“Yeah, I’m sure. When I booked her, she said her name was Yashin. I asked her if she was related to Pavel Yashin, and she said he was her father. I just about shit when I heard that. I asked her why she was hookin’. She’s got all the money she needs. She wouldn’t answer.”
I went for the door-had to get out of there.
Josephs stayed seated. “Sorry to break it to you. You were gonna dump her anyway, weren’t you?”
I stopped, my hand on the doorknob. “Why do you say that?”
“You’re about to arrest her father. Aren’t you gonna sting him? Give him a line like, ‘You’re under arrest, and I’ve been fuckin’ your daughter.’ Shit, that’s cold! That would sting him good, Juno. You could even dress it up a little-”
Paul put his hand on my shoulder and guided me out.
I couldn’t think straight. All this time she’d been with me, she’d been…
Paul yelled over the rattle of rain on the aluminum overhang. “What do you want to do?”
“I don’t know. I have to talk to her.”
“Are you sure that’s a good idea?”
“No.”
“Can you keep that temper under wraps?”
“I don’t know.”
“Do you want me to come with you?”
“What good would that do?”
“I can watch while you talk. The second I see your switch go off, I’ll stop you before you hurt her.”
“You think you can stop me?”
“I just did.”
I called Natasha, told her to come down to my place right away. Paul and I sat together wordlessly waiting. My emotions cycled with alarming speed-anger, hatred, disgust, grief, resentment, hostility…They all burned through me-their combined combustion nearing a flash point. A knock on the door launched me from my seat. Paul went in the bedroom, leaving the door cracked.
I opened the front.
Natasha’s gray dress matched the sheeting downpour. The smile on her face didn’t last long. “What’s wrong?”
I let her in and led her into the living room, into Paul’s view. “I talked to Officer Josephs today.”
Her defenses snapped into place. “So?”
“He told me he arrested you a year ago.”
“So what if he did?”
“You’re a prostitute. That’s what you do when you say you’re going out with your friends.”
She looked away.
“How could you do that to me?”
When she turned back, her eyes had ignited. “How could I do what? Open my legs for money?”
My vision started to blur. “Yes. How could you do that?”
“Because they fucking paid me.”
“I don’t pay you.”
“Yes you do. You’ll pay me when you arrest my father-a onetime fee!”
“Is that all I am to you? A means of getting rid of your father?” I was pacing now.
“Yes. That’s all you are, just a cop that can get me what I want. And I’m getting sick of you stringing me along!”
I could feel my pulse in my temples.
Natasha unleashed. “I came here expecting you to tell me you were going to arrest him today. For months, you’ve been leading me on. A real man wouldn’t be so chickenshit scared of my father!”
My head pounded; my stomach churned. My whole body ached for release.
She kept at me. “I’ll tell you another thing. I didn’t have to fake it with my johns!”
I wanted to lose control. The only thing holding me back was the fact that I knew she was deliberately provoking me. She wanted me to strike her…punish her.
I wouldn’t give her the satisfaction. I just hit her with the truth. “You hurt me, Natasha.”
She was positively fuming. My emotions suddenly shut down, like they’d overloaded. I watched her with a strange detachment. It finally occurred to me why I was so attracted to her in the first place. She was the only person I knew who was filled with more rage than me.
Nothing left to say, we stared at each other for long minutes. I saw her expression move from bitter to smoldering, then from smoldering to little-kid scared.
Questions ran through my head… How long has your father been raping you?…Is your shame so great that you punish yourself by selling your body?…Would you stop if I took your father away?
Instead I said, “Get out.”
“What?”
“Get out. I don’t want to see you.” I wanted her to pay for how I felt.
“Please, Juno. I didn’t mean those things I said.” She was misting up now.
“Get out.”
“But I quit. I quit! I quit after I met you.” Tears rolled down her brown cheeks. “Don’t do this, Juno. You can’t do this to me. Don’t leave me!”
I went to the door and opened it.
“I’m sorry. I should have told you, but I quit. I didn’t think it mattered. Don’t do this!”
She stepped out the door where elongated raindrops were stabbing the ground like glass pencils driven into the mud. She slipped and just managed to catch herself by dropping her hands to the ground. She pushed herself back up and pulled her hands free from the wet earth, her fingers coated with mud. She flicked her hands in an effort to get the clumps off but just wound up spraying the front of her dress with muddy water. She looked at me. Her eyes imploring.
You can’t do this to her, Juno, Don’t be an asshole.
I closed the door in her face.
Paul and I were still at my place. I called off the Yashin arrest. “Wait and see if we can get Bandur,” I said.
Paul tried to talk me out of it. “Are you sure? It’s going to kill your chances with Natasha. If we nab her
