shouldn’t have left them. I shouldn’t have been so stupid.
“I’m so sorry, Bella,” Alex said, trying to sit up. “It’s my fault.”
She bit her lip and folded her arms across her chest, her fingers still wrapped around the Legos. “No. It’s not. It’s mine. For letting this go on so long.”
“Noah left me here,” he said. “I should’ve gotten up when you got in the shower.”
She shook her head. “It’s not your fault. David was going to make his point one way or another. And he decided to do it.”
I bent down next to her. “Bella. Listen to me. He did this because he’s pissed at me. Because I showed him up.”
“He took my kid.” Her voice broke and I put my hand on her shoulder.
“We’ll get him back.”
She looked at me with a ferocity I’d never seen. “Promise?”
The guilt sat on my shoulders like dead weight. My decision to get her out had hurt Jackson. It was on me to fix it and I hadn’t been good at fixing anything in a really long time.
“Promise.”
She dropped the bricks she was holding and stood. “Tell me what to do.”
I fingered the Legos on the floor, thinking. “He wants his money, Bella. And he wants me. Because I did this to him. Put him in this position.”
“No,” she said, her eyes narrowing. “He’s doing it because he can.”
I waited, watching her. The sadness and helplessness were battling with some other emotion inside of her. Anger.
She paced the floor. “Control. I told you. He needs control. Just like Evan. When you told him I wouldn’t run for him anymore, he lost control of me. Now he’s got it back.” She paused. “Only way he’s gonna give that up is if he’s dead. I promise.”
Alex finally managed to push himself into a sitting position. He grabbed a tissue from the table and wiped at his mouth. “Not if we get you to San Diego. He won’t go that far.”
She sat down next to him. “It doesn’t feel like I can get far enough away.” She hesitated. The anger died out and the tears resurfaced. “And now he has Jax.”
The sobs came out in short bursts. Alex put his arm around her and she collapsed into him, her body shaking as she cried against him.
I watched her, helpless.
Liz’s voiced whispered in my head again.
“Gimme your phone, Alex,” I said.
He looked at me, confused, but dug into his pocket. He fished it out and handed it to me.
I opened the contacts and found what I was looking for. “I gotta go outside and make a call.”
“What are you doing?” he asked.
Bella pushed tighter into him, her crying muffled as she pressed into his chest.
I headed for the door. “Being me.”
FORTY-THREE
Fifteen minutes later, I walked back into the house and handed the phone to Alex. He still had his arm around Bella. She’d stopped crying, but looked lifeless against him.
I sat down on the coffee table and touched her knee. “We need to get you packed.”
She didn’t move, but her eyes shifted in my direction. “I’m not going anywhere without Jax.”
“I know,” I said. “You have my word. We’re going to go get him and then we’ll get you to San Diego. But we need to be ready to go and that means getting you packed. Whatever you need to take with you. We’ll figure out furniture and things like that later on. But anything you and Jackson need for the short term? We need to get it packed now.”
“Why?” she asked, sitting up from Alex. “I don’t understand.”
“The only thing you need to understand is that we’re going to get Jax back and then get you both to San Diego,” I said. “But I don’t wanna waste time. As soon as it’s time to go, you need to be ready. So that means packing.”
Alex’s arm tightened around her. “And it’ll give you something to focus on. This is something you can do.” He looked at me and I nodded. “Best thing you can do is be ready to go when we bring him back.”
I hadn’t known Alex well back in San Diego, but in that moment, his willingness to just go along with me without asking questions and to suggest exactly what I’d been about to suggest, made me very glad that he’d come to Florida.
“I don’t know if I can,” she said.
“Start with your stuff,” he said. “Let me talk to Noah for a minute and then I’ll come help you with Jax’s stuff. Alright?”
She looked at me. “You swear we won’t go until he’s back?”
“I swear, Bella,” I said. “We aren’t going anywhere without Jax.”
She looked at Alex and he smiled at her and there was something in the smile that made me feel left out. Not in a bad way, but there was something intimate there that I wasn’t a part of. She stood and walked slowly back toward the bedrooms.
As soon as she was out of earshot, Alex said “I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay.”
“I should’ve been awake,” he said, the features in his face tight with anger. “So stupid.”
“Why were in you Bella’s room?” I asked.
He sat up straighter, surprised. “How’d you know?”
“Whoever came in here, if you were on the couch, pretty sure you would’ve heard them sooner,” I said. “And pretty sure you would’ve scared the shit out of them and they would’ve done worse to you than they did.”
His shoulders fell and he exhaled. He rubbed his hands together. “Yeah. Right. I was in her room. She didn’t wanna be alone. Nothing happened. We just talked. She couldn’t sleep.” He shook his head. “We talked most of the night. About Jackson. His dad. Liz.”
I don’t think I winced outwardly at the mention of her name, but everything inside me did.
“We fell asleep on her bed together,” he said. “But nothing happened.”
“I’m not asking,” I said. “None of my business.”
“I know,” he said. “But I don’t want you thinking I’d do that. Take advantage of her or whatever.”
“I didn’t think that. I’m glad you were here to be with her. I think she likes you. That’s good.”
He shrugged. “For all the good I did.”
“Over and done,” I said. “And you’ll get a chance to fix it.”
He raised the eyebrow over the eye that wasn’t swollen shut. “Yeah?”
I nodded. “Yeah. I need to go do a few things, but we’re going to go get him tonight.”
“You’re sure it’s David?”
“I’m gonna find out for certain,” I said. “But, yeah, I feel sure.”
“So what are we gonna do?”
I stood. “I’ll tell you tonight. But we’re getting him back.”
He started to say something, then stopped. “Okay. Whatever you say. I’ll be ready.”
“No one comes in the front door but me,” I said. “Anyone else tries, shoot them.”
“Done,” he said.
“I’ll be back in a few hours,” I said. I nodded toward the back of the house. “Stay close to her. Just reassure her. And let her know she’ll be safe in San Diego.”
“Okay,” he said.
“Be okay if she stays with you for awhile when you get there?” I said. “In San Diego?”
