Myth-Gotten Gains

it. You had better have removed me from his care for a very important reason indeed, and not just to restore powers to a Pervert.'

Calypsa opened her mouth to speak, but I held up a hand to shush her. 'Not here,' I said. 'We'll get you your case, then go to someplace where it's less likely we'll Debugged.'

'My goodness, what an interesting place,' Kelsa said, from Tananda's shoulder bag. She had insisted that we not use the silencing cloth, and she had babbled nonstop since we bamfed in. 'Did that Deveel really just take that Imper for the last silver piece he had? And all because he was palming the bean that should have been under at least one of those shells?'

Her shrill voice was plenty audible enough so that the Imp in question heard it. He glared at the Deveel, who glared in our

direction. The Imp demanded a refund. The Deveel, no surprise, refused. That started an argument with the huckster that drew an audience from the surrounding booths. I put a hand into Calypsa's back and hustled her out of the way of the brawl that was going to start in, oh, ten seconds.

Nine. Eight. Seven. Six.

'You cheated me, you scarlet shyster! Give me back my money, or I'll blow your head off!'

Oh, well, a little ahead of schedule.

The Deveel behind the leatherwork counter listened as Calypsa recited the details of the case Asti wanted. We all thought it would be better if none of the Golden Hoard said anything. The last thing I needed was a rumor going around that they were in the dimension. It would start a gold rush the likes of which hadn't been seen in a century.

'...And cashmere lining. Purple,' Calypsa said. 'Good enough to last for a hundred years.'

'Uh-huh,' said Stankel, noting down the information on a scrap of leftover parchment. 'Not the usual stuff I do for you, pretty girl,' he said, patting Tanda on the bottom. She smiled at him with such concentrated sweetness that he moved his hand back in alarm. I grinned.

'Just give me the estimate,' I said.

'Well, it's custom work,' he began, ticking off the items on the list. 'Rush job, you said. Special dyes. It'll have to be clegborn beetle wing dye for the lining—it's the best. Doesn't run, won't fade. Tooling on the leather representing water flowing up out of a fountain, waves crashing on the shore, that kind of thing. If you don't mind magikal carving, I can do anything you want. Saves time. The name on the top is Asti, you said?'

He glanced up at me with a gleam in his eye. I was afraid that he'd catch on. Deveels didn't get to be the most feared traders in a hundred dimensions by missing implications, and they never forgot any detail that might be worth a copper to them.

'Yeah.' I leaned close. 'I wouldn't want it to get around. We're running an...operation. You understand. Set a fraud to catch a fraud, you know. Not like we've got the real Asti.'

'I see,' Stankel said, licking the end of his pencil and scrawling a final note. 'No, I get it. Where would you get a Hoard treasure, Aahz?' He laughed.

I resented his implication, but I didn't want to start a fight. Not yet, anyhow.

'How much?' I asked.

'Oh, well, seeing as how you're an old friend, and Tanda here's a regular customer.. .half a gold piece.'

'How much?' I asked.

'Half a gold piece. And I'm taking bread out of my children's mouths to give you a price that low.'

'Your children are in their sixties,' I pointed out. 'If you're still feeding them, you're as crummy a parent as you are a businessman. This might be good work, but I could get Steger to whip out the same for a tenth.'

'A tenth! You're out of your mind!'

I smiled. Now things were beginning to move. 'Not so crazy as you are.'

'How could you even think of offering me such a pathetic sum for my quality leather goods?' He appealed to passersby. 'This stinking Pervert thinks he can ask the craftsman Stankel for custom work for a rotten tenth of a gold piece! Four tenths, or I'll throw you out of this booth on your scaly bottom!'

'That's Pervect,' I bellowed, 'and I'd like to see you try it! Two tenths!'

It was past lunch time, so the crowd that gathered to listen to us haggle wasn't as large as it might be, which suited me just fine. I didn't want anyone reading over Stankel's shoulder. Tananda was used to the custom of bargaining in the Bazaar, but Calypsa was beginning to shy backwards, away from our voices. I couldn't take the time out to let her know this was normal. Suddenly, I saw the gleam of Ersatz's eyes peeking out of the wrapping over her shoulder. Gradually, the Walt

stopped trembling. After a while, she looked as if she was actually enjoying the show. When we finally finished haggling and agreed on a quarter gold piece, she joined in the applause. I thought it had been a pretty good show, myself.

After letting Stankel take measurements of Asti, we left him to work. He wasn't too impressed with the pathetically banged-up cup for which we were buying a fancy box, but had bought the story we were using it to run some kind of elaborate scam. He knew, as any Deveel would from birth, that it was solid gold, but I had chosen Stankel on purpose because he was almost as magik-blind as I was at the moment. He couldn't feel the mystical wallop she and the other two packed.

'Give me a couple of hours,' Stankel said. 'I should be able to whip something together by then.'

Chapter 8

I SWAGGERED AS I led the others out of the booth, leading them deftly through a party of drunken Vikings negotiating for hide-covered shields. We shoved past an Imp buying yard goods in colors nature never intended, and swung wide around a party of gaping Kobolds taking snapshots of an eight-armed juggler, whose partner was picking their pockets. As we went past a cross street Calypsa went weak at the knees.

'What is that stink?' she gasped, staggering. I caught a strong, malodorous whiff that made me smile.

'Pervish cooking,' I said. 'The restaurant's not far away.'

'No,' Tananda said firmly. 'Hasn't she been through enough in the last few days? There's no reason to subject her to your kind of food.'

I lowered my eyebrows. It had been a while since I had tasted home cooking. Tananda gave me one of those looks that meant business, as in we were engaged in business, and pleasure would have to wait I thought about it. We could split up, but that only meant double the chances that some of the free-lance brigands that shopped the Bazaar could get a crack at the goods we were carrying. I sighed.

Instead, I headed for the Yellow Crescent Inn, where my buddy Gus the Gargoyle pulled strawberry milkshakes for those discerning customers who could use a little privacy when they ate lunch The Yellow Crescent's food was bland, because the diners liked it that way. I could eat it, but I considered it no more than fodder.

To my relief, the other patrons who were in the Inn were all strangers. We didn't have any trouble taking possession of a corner booth, where both Tanda and I could have our backs to the wall. Gus waved to us with a broad stone hand, then came around the counter to greet us.

'Hey, Aahz, long time no see!' he said, extending bone-crushing handgrips with us. 'You been away? Hey, Tananda. You look lovely, as usual.'

'Hi, Gus,' she said, warmly.

'The usual?'

She nodded. I grunted. 'Yeah.'

Gus turned to Calypsa.

'How about you, honey? You're a Walt, ain't you? Don't get a lot of your kind here on Deva. What'll it be? Milkshake on the house for a friend of my pal here.'

Calypsa looked confused, so I shook my head.

'Let the kid here see the menu, Gus, and make sure no one interrupts us, okay? We've got a little business