Waterborn

Tsem accepted the water thirstily and listened with wide eyes as she explained where they were, what had occurred while he slept.

'What will we do?' he asked, when she had finished.

'I don't know,' she replied. 'But I hope you will stay with me. I can't bear to lose you, too.'

'Of course, Princess. I am your servant.'

'No,' she refuted. 'I am no princess and you are no servant, not out here. If you stay with me here, it must be because you choose to.'

Tsem nodded and sat up, gazing silently out the bright rectangle of the door.

'I should like to step outside,' he said at last.

'I don't know…'

'Please.'

She was scant help in aiding Tsem to his feet, but in reality he seemed to need only her moral support. Out in the sun, he leaned against the clay-plastered wall of the hut, gazed around at the distant horizon.

'I would like to find my mother's people,' he said at last. 'Someday. She used to tell me about them…'

'We can do that,' Hezhi said.

'Not necessarily right away,' Tsem put in. 'But someday.'

'Someday,' she agreed, and grinned. She laid her hand on his shoulder, and together they contemplated the distance.

EPILOGUE

Autumn

A month passed, and the sky grew clearer, the winds colder. Some days brought clouds of geese and ducks, winging from the north in search of a warmer sun. Others brought the cold fingers of winter the birds were fleeing. The Mang worked hard in that month, chinking up houses, trekking to the wetlands nearer the River to gather nuts and berries, ranging in the uplands for meat and pine nuts.

Tsem recovered slowly, but after the first week the Mang healer attending him announced that he would certainly live— though he hinted that the debts he had incurred with certain gods would have to be repaid. Perkar, eager to do his part, organized a hunting expedition with Ngangata and a few younger Mang men. It was decided that a few women would accompany them, as well, and Hezhi, unskilled as she was, begged to be included.

Two days brought them to a lightly forested canyon, and there they made a strong camp, set up tents, dug firepits, built skinning frames for the hides they hoped the men would bring in. Hezhi set about learning the things Mang women did: gathering nuts, digging roots, tanning hides. The work was hard, and many times, early on, kindled nostalgia for the palace, where she was waited on by servants. The women she worked with were cordial but a little impatient with her. They seemed to expect her to already know how to do things. Hezhi was a quick learner, however, and before many days had passed the women began including her in their storytelling sessions, laughing now and then at her highly imperfect Mang, but never with any malice. The men returned every few days, always with game, and the women murmured much about the skill of Ngangata and his bow. Perkar was less esteemed, but he also killed much game, often entering the camp, flushed with his success, 'like a little boy, just learning to hunt,' the women would exclaim.

Half a month passed at the camp, and Hezhi began to feel a certain contentment, the days settling on her shoulders like a warm coat, her fingers learning their tasks as her tongue became comfortable with the language of the Horse People. One of the young warriors began flirting with her, and she became the object of good-natured gossip, though she kept a good distance from the young man. The lesson she had learned with Yen—Ghe?— was not one she would unlearn quickly. It was one of three pains still throbbing in her. The palace and her family were already fading. They were, as the saying went, more of her skin than her heart. But she missed Qey and Ghan, feared for them. She wondered often what the letter Ghan had left her contained—it had gone with Zeq' and his boat when he had fled.

Toward evening of the twentieth day in camp, Hezhi was scraping clean an antelope skin when the packhorses began to pace nervously in their corral. Many of the women stopped in their tasks, gazing down the canyon to see who or what might be approaching. They soon made out two riders, and one of the older women, astute in such matters, recognized Brother Horse and Yuu'han, his grandnephew.

That evening they held a celebration. Fortuitously, the hunters returned that same day, and so a deer was dressed and roasted. Brother Horse brought with him beer, candy, copper bells for the men and their horses, cloth and knives for the women. To Hezhi he gave one of the knives, a small, sharp blade.

'They tell me you learn quickly,' he said. 'Every Mang woman needs a good skinning knife.'

'Thank you,' she said, meaning it. The knife borrowed from Duk had always been that, and she was astonished at how happy she was to have her own.

'Well,' Brother Horse went on, when she had accepted her present. 'I have something else for you, as well.' He drew forth a small bundle from his pack. 'A friend of yours sent this along.'

'A friend of mine?'

'Yes. Yuu'han and I rode down to Nhol, to buy sugar and knives.'

'Nhol?' She took the package, fumbled it open with eager fingers. Saltwater started in her eyes when she saw what was enclosed. There was a book—The Mang Wastes—and a ten-score roll of blank paper. The latter was accompanied by pen and powdered ink. There was a note, as well.

'Hezhi,' the note began.

I have lived a long life, but there has never been much joy in it. What pleasure I did find was usually in the paper and ink surrounding me. And so I thank you for an unaccustomed sort of happiness. I never intended to love you, you know, for I have learned that love is rarely pleasurable. It was not when I thought you dead. I cursed myself daily. Yet now I hear you live and are safe, and I no longer regret my affection. I would, of course, never say these things to you, but pen and paper may speak when I am silent.

I know you must worry about your nurse, Qey, but she is well. The soldiers found her half dead amongst dead priests and believed her to be the victim of your crazed bodyguard as much as they. Neither has anyone pointed a finger at me. The massacre at the South Gate is little talked about, and your name is spoken only as Hezhinata.

I have sent along a paper and pen with the Mang; I only hope they do not use it to wipe themselves with along the way back to you. It is my hope that you will compose a letter or two to an old man, telling him of the things you see. There must yet be wonders he has not read of.

You must not return to Nhol, Hezhi. Nothing pleasant awaits you here. I have confidence in you, know that you will make a life for yourself wherever you go. You have that in you, and it is all you, nothing of the River you leave behind. Be blessed by whatever gods there are in your travels, and try to think kindly of me, though I was never as good to you as I should have been.

—Ghan

She read the letter and read it again, never sure whether to laugh or cry. It did not really matter; either would have contained the same mixture of joy and melancholy. She gave Brother Horse a hug and thanked him again. Grinning, he patted her shoulder and then started to rejoin his family in drinking. He turned, though, gazed at her seriously.

'You may become Mang, if you wish,' he said. 'I will adopt you as my daughter, and we will find a good, capable husband for you. Who knows? Now and then I see the sparkle of power in you—not like it was, of course, not enough to change you, but perhaps enough to make you a shamaness, to earn an honest living that doesn't involve scraping hides.'

'I'm learning to like scraping hides, thank you,' she replied. 'But I thank you for your offer. It is very kind, since I know I would be a burden, at least for a time.'

'Families have broad shoulders,' Brother Horse replied, 'made to bear burdens.'

'I don't know what I will do yet,' she mused. 'I think Perkar and I must speak.'

'You are not bound to him,' Brother Horse said.

'No, not bound exactly,' she half agreed. 'But there are debts we share, responsibilities we hold together.'

Brother Horse shook his head. 'Such young people to be so serious. Enjoy yourselves, before your bones turn into dry sticks and your skin into leather.'