Into the Void

It felt like he was doing everything right. The sword struck the thick mast… but not with the point. The blade had turned slightly out of true, and the flat of the blade glanced along the side of the mast. The impact-heavy, with his full weight behind it-bent his wrist back painfully, and the sword clattered to the deck.

'What happened?' Aelfred sneered. 'Did the mast disarm you? No. Did you keep your wrist straight like I told you?'

'No,' Teldin mumbled, cradling his sore wrist against his belly. 'I bent it.'

'Too bloody right, you bent it,' Aelfred roared. 'Pick up your sword and do it right. Pick it up!'

With a muttered curse, Teldin picked up the word. He knew that Aelfred's feigned anger was a tactic used by military trainers everywhere, but that didn't mean it stung him any less. He dropped back into the ready position and poised on the balls of his feet. The weight of the sword hurt his wrist, but he tried to force the pain from his mind. He tried to concentrate, tried to slip into the state of focus he'd felt before, but it wouldn't come. Why not? he found himself wondering. If Estriss was right, and the concentration was some power of the cloak, why couldn't he summon it now? Was it something that happened only when he was in real danger? Or had it nothing to do with the cloak at all?

'What are you waiting for?' Aelfred asked, sarcasm dripping from his words. 'Waiting for the mast to come up and impale itself? Do id'

Teldin took a deep breath and lunged. At the last instant he remembered: straight mist. His arm shot out, backed by the full weight of his body. At the moment of impact he expected a jolt of agony in his wrist, but it never came. Straight and firm, the joint took the impact with no pain or problem. With a solid thunk the sword drove deep into the mast.

The lunge had felt good, he realized. Everything worked, and it felt smooth, almost natural. He looked at the sword, buried in the mast at chest-height. A full hand's breadth of the blade had sunk into the seasoned ironwood. He let go of the sword-giving the handle a slight tug to the side as he did so, so that the weapon quivered and sang. He pulled himself to rigid attention and snapped Aelfred a perfect salute the way he'd learned in the army. 'The mast is dead, sir,' he barked.

He held the salute while Aelfred struggled vainly not to laugh. The warrior slapped him on the shoulder. 'Good for you, lad,' he chuckled. 'Nice thrust. We'll do some more work on this later.' He paused. 'Tell you what, head on down to the officers' saloon. I'll join you as fast as I can. I feel the urge to buy you a drink.' In perfect parade- ground style, he returned Teldin's salute and barked, 'Dismissed,' then he turned to the crewman who'd been watching everything with some amusement. 'Well, Gendi? Aren't you going to come and get your sword?'

*****

Teldin had come to appreciate the officers' saloon as a place to relax and to think. It was a comfortable room, much more so than any other cabin aboard the Probe. There was a single central table, large and circular, built out of a slice from the trunk of a great tree. The pale orange wood had, been oiled and polished to bring out the complex grain structure, and Teldin found it beautiful. All his life he'd had an appreciation for the carpenter's art and enjoyed the feel, of good wood and carving tools in his hands. At times he'd wished that his circumstances had been different, that he'd had time to devote to honing his skills. When-if-he ever returned home, he firmly intended to make himself a table like the one in the saloon.

The chairs that surrounded the table were covered in rich burgundy leather. The seats and backs were only slightly padded-probably with horsehair, he imagined-but their angle and form made them more comfortable than some of the deeply padded chairs he'd seen on his travels. There was a two-seat couch of the same construction against the forward bulkhead, and a small liquor cabinet-locked, with the only keys in the possession of the senior officers-in the corner just aft of the door.

The main feature of the officers' saloon, and the thing that attracted Teldin most of all, was the huge oval porthole mounted in the outboard bulkhead. This porthole filled the entire length of the bulkhead, more than the height of a man, and rose from the deck to the overhead. The crystal that filled it was quite different from the glass he'd seen in some windows on Krynn. While that glass had been rippled and uneven, distorting the view through it, this was smooth and uniform. It was thick, though; he could tell that from the fact that everything seen through it took on the faintest tinge of green. The crystal didn't feel like glass, either. A glass window would have been slightly chill to the touch. This, in contrast, seemed to have no temperature at all, and when he ran his hands over it, they left no streaks or fingerprints. The port was divided into panes: a central circle, like the pupil of an eye, surrounded by half a dozen curved segments.

During the voyage through wildspace before reaching the crystal shell, Teldin had found himself drawn to the saloon. He had often come here and drawn up one of the chairs in front of the port. Sometimes for hours he'd sat there, staring out on the blackness of space and the stats, given the faintest green tint by the crystal. There was beauty out there, he found. Not the beauty of the rugged mountains or rolling, golden-waved plains that he'd known on Krynn, but a pristine, crystal cleat beauty that he found endlessly fascinating.

There was peace out there, too, peace for a troubled soul. There was danger in wildspace, he knew-the gnomes and Estriss had told him so, and he'd seen it for himself-but when he looked out on its perfection, that danger seemed less emotionally burdensome. Seated here, with the stars spread out before him like a mighty tapestry, he could think and he could remember without the pangs of fear and sorrow that so often almost overwhelmed him. Particularly when he was supposed to be sleeping.

Sometimes when he'd come here, there had been others in the room: officers sitting around in low-voiced discussion. All had been friendly enough, even when it was apparent that he didn't want to join their conversation, and they'd had the sensitivity not to disturb him when he drew up his chair and turned his back to them. Perhaps they felt the same wonder he did. In fact, he was sure that another-perhaps more than one-did much the same as he did. When he was done with his introspection, he'd always returned his chair to its original spot. Sometimes when he had entered the saloon, one of the chairs had already faced the port.

He was well familiar with the officers' saloon and approved of Aelfred's suggestion of it as a place to talk.

When he entered the saloon now, however, there was already a figure there. Estriss sat alone at the table, a goblet set before him. Teldin knew that the mind flayer didn't drink alcohol or even fruit juice, so he assumed the goblet contained either water or some illithid concoction. Teldin opened his mouth to greet the captain, but the creature beat him to it.

Welcome, Estriss said. Come, join me. He indicated a chair. I saw your practice on the forecastle, the creature continued as Teldin took the offered seat. Aelfred Silverhorn is a good instructor, and you will gain much from his tutelage.

'I need to,' Teldin admitted.

The illithid's facial tentacles moved in a sinuous pattern that Teldin had tentatively identified as equivalent to a smile. Perhaps. Estriss raised his goblet into the midst of the tentacles, and Teldin heard a slurping sound. I thought perhaps we might continue our earlier conversation, the mind flayer continued. You must have questions.

Teldin hesitated. There was one thing he'd been wondering about…. Since he had come aboard the Probe, Teldin had referred to Estriss as 'he,' though he was never really sure of the creature's gender. 'Are you male?' he blurted.

There was a booming laugh from the doorway. Both human and illithid turned.

Aelfred Silverhorn stood in the doorway, a broad grin on his face. 'When I saw you were both here, I figured you were talking of weighty matters,' he said, 'and I walk in on this.' He paused, then replied to a silent comment from Estriss, 'Don't mind if I do. One for Teldin, too?' He sauntered over to the liquor cabinet and unlocked it. 'Pray continue. Don't let me interrupt you.'

From the burning in his cheeks, Teldin knew he was blushing furiously. Estriss seemed unaffected… but how could Teldin recognize embarrassment-or outrage-in a mind flayer? 'No offense,' he muttered.

None taken, Estriss replied immediately. Curiosity is understandable. You wonder, quite naturally, about my sex. Simply put, I have none, not in the biological sense. Any individual of my race can bring forth young, and with no participation from another individual. I have often thought that this is the single knot that most sets my race apart from yours. Think how much of your culture derives born sexual origins,