Newspapers. That had been Jeannotte’s suggestion. Yes. I’d use the time I had on Monday to view old newspapers. I had to go to McGill anyway to return the diaries.
I slid back into the hot water and thought about my sister. Poor Harry. I’d pretty much ignored her yesterday. I’d been tired, but was that it? Or was it Ryan? She had every right to sleep with him if she wanted. So why had I been so cold? I resolved to be more friendly tonight.
* * *
I was toweling off when I heard the beep of the security alarm. I dug out a flannel Disney nightshirt Harry had given me one Christmas, and pulled it over my head.
I found her standing in the living room, still wearing her jacket, gloves, and hat, her eyes fixed on something a million miles away.
“Long day, I’d say.”
“Yeah.” She refocused on the present, and gave me a half smile.
“Hungry?”
“I guess. Just let me have a few minutes.” She threw her pack onto the couch and flopped down beside it.
“Sure. Take your coat off and stay awhile.”
“Right. Damn, it gets cold here. I feel like a Popsicle just walking from the metro.”
A few minutes later I heard her in the guest room, then she joined me in the kitchen. I grilled the salmon and tossed the salad while she set the table.
When we sat down to eat I asked about her day.
“It was fine.” She cut her potato, squeezed it, and added sour cream.
“Fine?” I encouraged.
“Yeah. We covered a lot.”
“You look like you covered forty miles of bad road.”
“Yeah. I’m pretty beat.” She didn’t smile at my use of her expression.
“So what did you do?”
“Lots of lectures, exercises.” She spooned sauce onto her fish. “What are these little green threads?”
“Dill. What kinds of exercises?”
“Meditation. Games.”
“Games?”
“Storytelling. Calisthenics. Whatever they tell us to do.”
“You just do whatever they say?”
“I do it because I choose to do it,” she snapped.
I was taken aback. Harry rarely barked at me like that.
“Sorry. I’m just tired.”
For a while we ate in silence. I didn’t really want to hear about her touchy-feely therapy, but after a few minutes I tried again.
“How many people are there?”
“Quite a few.”
“Are they interesting?”
“I’m not doing this to make new friends, Tempe. I’m learning to be accountable. To be responsible. My life sucks, and I’m trying to figure out how to make it work.”
She stabbed at her salad. I couldn’t remember when I’d seen her so down.
“And these exercises help?”
“Tempe, you just have to try it for yourself. I can’t tell you exactly what we do or how it works.”
She scraped off the dill sauce and picked at her salmon.
I said nothing.
“I don’t think you’d get it anyway. You’re too frozen.”
She picked up her plate and carried it to the kitchen. So much for my resolve to be interested.
I joined her at the sink.
“I think I’m just going to turn in,” she said, laying a hand on my shoulder. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”
“I’m leaving in the afternoon.”
“Oh. I’ll call you.”
In bed, I replayed the conversation. I’d never seen Harry so listless, or so snappish when approached. She
