Maybe that lessens the sting of losing Miram.
She orders Corbin inside. Still, he doesn’t move. Just looks at me in that consuming way of his that creeps me out. But now I’m bonded to his cousin, beyond his reach.
So why? He doesn’t know it’s all a farce. He can’t know that. And yet he stares.
I turn and go inside, my flesh prickling, still feeling his watchful gaze.
Cassian and I eat together in silence, our last meal alone. Then I catch myself and realize all the remaining nights this week will be like this. Him. Me. Alone.
We’ll go our separate ways during the day, performing our duties, socializing, living. But our nights are reserved for each other. My skin shivers, heat crawling deep beneath the skin.
Until, of course, I make my escape.
“Do you have plans for tomorrow?”
“I’m going to see my sister,” I answer truthfully, before I can think that maybe I shouldn’t bring up Tamra.
He nods, scrapes the tines of his fork along his plate. “Maybe I should come with you—”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” I quickly say.
He nods again, slowly, processing. “Okay.”
I stab a piece of fish on my plate. I don’t need him hanging around when I tell my sister that I plan to run away with Will and want her to come with us.
“For now,” he adds.
I look up, frowning. “What do you mean?”
He continues, “I can’t hide from your sister forever. We have to make things right.”
“You think that can happen?” I ask, staring intently at him. “That you can make things right with Tamra?”
He grimaces, shifts in his chair across from me. “I hope so. She’s your sister and I’m your…”
I stare at him, my gaze sharp, cutting. Don’t say it.
“We’re family now. All of us.”
I say nothing. Gripping my plate, I rise and enter the kitchen and start on the dishes with feverish intensity.
Cassian joins me. Side by side, I wash and he dries. We work silently, fall into a rhythm. I wince as I think of my parents doing this same thing for years, standing in this very spot. Bonded.
Only we’re not my parents. Not even close. We don’t laugh and talk. We don’t share stories about our day. I don’t allow that. I feel a certain sadness drifting off him and settling deeply into me, mingling with my own heartache for Will and Mom. And this only makes me madder. I shouldn’t have to feel his emotions. I have enough of my own to cope with.
As we perform our mundane task, I think about tomorrow. When I’ll see Tamra again. When we can talk about how we will leave this world behind forever. A world that steals from you and gives nothing in return.
Chapter 25
I rise early and don’t bother with breakfast. No sound comes from Cassian’s room as I slip from the house. I rush through the township, through streets that are mostly bare, the dawn air thick as chalk dust, still and silent except for my thundering tread and gasping breath.
As I hurry down Main, my spirits lift when Nidia’s cottage comes into view. Then my elation is crushed.
My heart seizes as Corbin steps into my path, appearing out of nowhere. From behind a hedge, I guess. As though he were lying in wait. He grabs my arm and drags me beneath one of the many evergreens lining the lower half of Main. He presses me against the rough bark, trapping me between the massive tree and his body.
“Take your hands off me,” I hiss. My body reacts instantly, instinct kicking in. Fire erupts at my core, smolder eating up my throat. The taste of ash and char coats my mouth.
“Let’s get something straight.”
I don’t listen, don’t care to hear whatever it is he has to say.
Shaking with fury, I glare down at his hands on my arms. Emotion sweeps over me in a hot burn. “You dare touch me? Cassian will kill—”
“Oh, very affecting. I’m impressed. I almost believe you and Cassian are a true couple instead of the charade you’re playing at.”
Cold sweeps through me, dousing my heat. “W-what do you mean?”
Corbin leans in, brushes his nose to my cheek, and inhales sharply. I cringe at the contact and blink once, hard. “I know the truth,” he whispers, his voice a harsh rasp in my ear. “You’re not his. You’ve never been his. You’ve always held yourself from him. Bonding with him hasn’t changed that.”
I open my mouth to deny this, but can’t. I can’t say the words, can’t insist that Cassian and I are in love. Saying those words, with Will in my heart… I just
“I’d see it in your eyes. He’d be a part of you. But you’re the same. Unchanged.”
It’s strange, but I almost hope he’s right.
His eyes glint, flash down at me. “Still untouched.” He smiles then, a cruel twist of his lips. “Which means there’s still a chance for us.”
I snort. “You’re crazy.”
“Keep telling yourself that. Only I know the truth, and soon everyone else will, too. If I have to singlehandedly make them see it. I’ll prove it. And then I’ll be there to do what my cousin is too much of a coward to do.”
I can’t breathe as I stare up into his face. If I didn’t know I needed to get away — far away — this would only confirm it. Corbin is crazy enough to do just what he says.
He inches his head closer… like he’s actually going to kiss me. “I’ll still claim you.”
I don’t think. Just react. I part my lips and release the burn that froths at my core, making my skin contract and snap fiercely.
Steam pours from my lips in a thin ribbon. Satisfaction swells inside me as the hot vapor scalds him. He howls, clutching the right side of his face. I seize my opportunity and squeeze out from between him and the tree.
I run the rest of the way to Nidia’s, his shouts chasing after me.
“It’s you and me, Jacinda. I’m going to own you! You can’t run forever!”
I jerk to a hard stop at Nidia’s door and resist the urge to pound the wood with my fist. It’s still early. No sense beating the door as if wild wolves were chasing me.
I rest one hand against the door, the other to my heart, gathering my breath. When the door pulls opens, I stop just short of falling forward.
Tamra stands there, her red-rimmed eyes inscrutable, but I know she’s hurting as much as I am.
“Let’s run away,” I blurt. Just like that. No easing in, no working up to it.
Holding my breath, I wait and hope I’m not off base to think she’ll even consider the risky venture. That she’ll even want to surrender her newfound status with the pride. It feels like forever as I wait for her to answer me, to speak, to say anything.
“How soon can we leave?”
I release a ragged breath, almost weep from the relief — and then I realize the tricky part is still left. I have to explain Will.
I glance over my shoulder, making sure Corbin is gone, and then I turn around and glance pointedly inside the house. Tamra quickly motions me in and leads me to her room — what was once Nidia’s spare room. The bedroom doesn’t bear her mark yet. She’s transferred very little from her old room at our house into it. Even Nidia’s sewing table still occupies one side.
I sit on the unmade bed, the covers a wild tangle beneath me.
