clenched. Anger replaced his grief and gave his face a hard edge. “You’re scared of being alone, afraid that there might be someone you can count on. You’re terrified of putting your heart and soul in my hands for fear that I will leave you.”
Her knees threatened to buckle. Each word was like a slap in the face, worse because they were true. She turned and ran away, ignoring Fallon as he shouted her name. Larena didn’t stop until she found herself in a tower. She huddled on the floor in the small chamber and let the tears come.
No longer did she hold back the misery and loneliness she had ignored for too long. Fallon had ripped open her despair and it stared at her, demanding she acknowledge it.
But she couldn’t.
Fallon cursed himself for ten kinds of a fool. He shouldn’t have said those things to Larena. He knew he would have to handle her with care, but his temper had got the best of him when she said she couldn’t give him what he needed.
He watched her race away from him, his heart breaking into a million pieces. He knew then he had lost her for good. The pain that ripped through him was worse than when he had lost his family and his clan.
Fallon fell to his knees from the weight of it. He threw back his head and spread his arms wide as he bellowed his anguish.
But even that didn’t help.
He dropped his chin to his chest and covered his face with his hands. Everything he tried to fix, he only made worse. Look what had happened to Quinn. And now Larena.
He wasn’t fit to lead himself, much less an army of Warriors if he couldn’t win Larena. The rage that came over him was swift. His skin tingled with the change, but he didn’t try to stop it. There was no stopping it now.
Mayhap not ever.
“Fallon?”
He jumped to his knees when he heard Lucan speak his name, but he didn’t face his brother. “Leave me.”
“I doona think so.” Lucan continued to approach him. “What happened? I saw Larena run into the castle.”
Fallon threw back his head and laughed, the sound hollow even to his own ears. “I’ve lost her, if she was ever mine to have.”
“Tell me,” Lucan urged, as he came to stand in front of him.
Fallon shook his head. “I need to be alone right now.”
“We need you.”
“Don’t,” Fallon bellowed. He turned his back to his brother. “You doona need me. You can lead these men, Lucan.”
“Nay, Fallon. Please don’t leave. I’ve already lost Quinn. I cannot lose you as well.”
Fallon looked at the cliffs before him. He had failed Lucan too many times before, he wouldn’t do it again even though every fiber of his being demanded he disappear and never return. “I’ll be back, Lucan.”
He bounded up the cliffs, not wanting to hear what his brother said in response. His heart hammered with exertion as he leaped from cliff to cliff and then raced over the rolling hills. He didn’t rest or stop until his feet could no longer carry him.
Fallon fell to the ground and rolled onto his back, his rapid breaths burning his lungs. He used his arm to shield his eyes from the setting sun and gazed into the vivid blue of the sky.
He wished he knew where he had gone wrong with Larena. He wanted her back in his arms again, wanted to hold her sweet body and smell her delicious scent of lilies.
But he had lost her.
He ground the heels of his hands into his eyes, trying to erase the image of Larena’s beautiful face from his mind. But Fallon knew that not even death could expunge her.
She was a part of him, just as his god was. Now and forever.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
When Larena cracked open her lids the sky was gray. She wiped at eyes that were itchy and swollen from her tears, but she didn’t care. Nothing mattered anymore.
She climbed to her feet and walked to the window. She hadn’t cried so much since her father had been murdered and she had been truly alone for the first time in her life.
Hours had gone by while she was sunk in her misery. She was supposed to relieve Cara to look after Malcolm, but she had forgotten her promise while her heart mourned.
Just thinking of Fallon brought a renewed wash of pain in her chest. She wasn’t sure how she was going to continue day after day with such anguish. She didn’t know if she could. The pain she had felt at her father’s murder was nothing compared to the ache within her now. This pain could never be soothed and would never leave her. Time might dim it, but all she would have to do was look at Fallon to see what could have been.
Larena blinked as her vision blurred with more tears. She would face one thing at a time. Right now she would concentrate on Malcolm. He needed her.
She hurried from the tower. She was tempted to use her power so no one could see her, but she had been a coward for too long. Fallon had made her see that.
As she descended the stairs into the great hall she saw Ramsey and Hayden still bent over the parchment. Without a second thought, Larena extracted the Scroll from the ring and walked over to the men.
“Here,” she said, and handed the Scroll to Ramsey. “This will help.”
Ramsey’s gray eyes narrowed as he looked from her hand to her face. “What is that?”
“The Scroll. I’m its keeper. I trust you will guard it with your life.”
Hayden swore beneath his breath, and Larena felt the tears threaten again.
“I’m sorry. I should have told everyone, but I had taken an oath that I would never speak of it.”
Ramsey reached for the Scroll and held it reverently between his hands. “There’s no need for you to apologize, Larena. You can trust us.”
“Just make sure our scroll is authentic enough to fool Deirdre. We need to get Quinn back. Fallon needs him.”
“We won’t let it out of our sight,” Hayden promised. “You have our word.”
She blinked her eyes to stop the seemingly constant tears and hurried from the castle. Every instinct within her told her not to trust Ramsey and Hayden, but she had to learn to do just that.
By the time she reached the cottage where Malcolm was, she had dried her tears and gotten her emotions under control.
Larena opened the door to find Cara sitting next to Malcolm’s bed with her sewing in her lap. The Druid looked up and beamed. The smile faded as she looked into Larena’s face.
“Is everything all right?” Cara asked as she rose to her feet.
Larena forced a grin she didn’t feel. Cara had always been so kind. Larena didn’t wish to burden her with problems that weren’t hers. “Everything is as it should be. I will sit with my cousin now.”
Cara watched her for a few tense moments before she gathered her sewing. She paused as she opened the door. “If you ever need to talk to someone, Larena, I’m here for you.”
The hated tears pricked her eyes. Larena hadn’t intended to speak, but suddenly words poured out of her mouth. “It’s been a long time since I’ve had a friend. Thank you, Cara.”
“It is I who should thank you. You’ve helped Fallon in ways Lucan and I could never dream. I don’t know what happened between you and Fallon while in Edinburgh, but he came back a changed man. Lucan says he’s the man he was before their god was unbound.”
Larena sank into the chair, her breath lodged in her throat. Had she helped Fallon? She didn’t think so. Fallon would have become that man again without her. “I wish I could take credit, but Fallon has always been that man.
