Ben eyed me suspiciously. Had I crossed a line? If so, I decided to keep going. I told him, “My mom will be coming. She’s hoping to get some help from the group.”
“Help for what?”
“She had a problem with prescription pills.”
His eyes widened. “Really? Your mom?”
“Yeah. I hope my dad will come, too. He used to go to AA meetings all the time. Do you know what those are?”
“Sure.”
“And my sister had a problem with pot last summer. I hope she’ll keep coming, too.”
Ben leaned back and exhaled. “Wow, Tom. I had no idea.”
“Nobody does. You heard Jenny talk about her father’s problem. And hell, Mike’s parents are both in jail.”
“Right.”
“Everybody acts like everything is okay at home, Ben. But that’s not true. You know?”
Ben looked really grateful. He answered huskily, “Yeah.”
Mrs. Cantwell appeared in the doorway. She spotted the coach behind
He dropped the magazine and jumped to his feet.
Mrs. Cantwell directed a withering stare at him. I noticed a group of kids clustered behind her in the hall. She said, “We have numerous teachers calling in sick today. I will be placing some students in your classroom for supervision.” She added, “I fully expect you to supervise them.”
Coach Malloy gulped and nodded. Mrs. Cantwell stepped aside, and ten kids shuffled into the classroom. They all took seats, put their heads down, and slept.
I continued to chat with Ben for the rest of first period. He wasn’t as strange as I had thought. I believe he
The bell finally rang. I don’t know where those extra kids went for second period. I don’t know where Ben went, either. Home, most likely. I entered Mr. Proctor’s room by myself and stopped in my tracks. Bizarrely, a sub was sitting at his desk, a sub who I knew.
Aunt Robin!
How weird was that? She looked incredibly out of place. She had on a pair of black pants and a very tight white blouse, like something she might wear for karaoke night at the Drunken Monkey. She had teased her hair up for the occasion.
She certainly looked relieved to see me. “Tom! Are you in this class?”
“Yes.”
“What class is it?”
I said, “English. Language arts.” Then I asked her the obvious question: “Aunt Robin, what are you doing here?”
Her hands shot upward, like she was signaling a touchdown. “Damned if I know! I got a call from some lady this morning at six a.m. Woke me up. And she asked me to come in here.”
“Some lady?”
“The principal lady.”
“Mrs. Cantwell?”
“Yeah. That’s her.” She explained, “I came in here a couple of days ago to apply for a job—secretary, cafeteria worker, anything, really. That’s how she got my number. She called me this morning and asked if I would come in as a parent volunteer.
“I asked her, ‘Do I get paid?’ She said, ‘No, I can’t pay you. But if a paying job opens up, I’ll remember that you did me this favor.’ So here I am.”
“Wow.”
“Arthur don’t even know I’m here. He’s sleeping in today.”
“Yeah. Good plan.”
She pointed to the sleeping kids in the back. “It’s just like babysitting. I don’t mind.”
I took a seat in front of her. A few seconds later, Lilly appeared at the door. She cupped her hands around her mouth and whispered loudly, “Tom! I called Mom. She’s on her way here.”
Lilly had not looked at the sub. But even if she had, I don’t think she would have recognized her. The context was just too wacky. I pointed to the desk and whispered back, “Look! It’s Aunt Robin! She’s the sub!”
Lilly’s head, followed by the rest of her body, bent backward in disbelief. She managed a friendly smile and a wave. Aunt Robin motioned for her to come in, which she did.
Aunt Robin followed our lead and continued the loud whispering. “Congratulations, Lilly! I hear you got engaged.”
Lilly instinctively held up her left ring finger. “Yes!”
“That’s great, honey! I hear he’s a nice guy, too.”
Lilly actually blushed. “Yeah.” She held the ring out for Aunt Robin to ooh and aah over.
“Beautiful. That’s real nice. I got married twice, but I never got a diamond ring.”
“No?”
“I got wedding rings, two of them, but I never got an engagement ring.”
Lilly told her sincerely, “I hope you will come to our wedding. We’ll send you an invitation.”
Aunt Robin seemed surprised, and touched. “Oh, thank you, honey. That’d be an honor. Did you set a date?”
“Not yet.”
“June, maybe? I was a June bride. The first time, anyway.”
“Is that when you married Uncle Robby?”
“Yeah.” She thought for a moment. Then she laughed, a little embarrassed, “I can’t remember the exact date now. June the third? The fourth? It was a Saturday, the Saturday after Robby graduated from here.”
Lilly observed, as if for the first time, “You were Robin and Robby! That’s so cute.”
“Yeah. That’s what everybody said.”
“Did you guys get married in a church?”
“Nah. The county courthouse. No muss, no fuss. Then we went back to Robby’s mom’s house. That’s where we were livin’ anyway.” She recalled, “Your mom and dad came over! Yeah. Your dad brought a case of Rolling Rock with a white bow around it. That became the big joke of the wedding—that my colors were green and white, like on the Rolling Rock beer bottle.”
Lilly laughed. Then she stole a look at her watch. “I’m sorry, Aunt Robin, but I’m pretty sure my mom’s parked outside.”
Aunt Robin pointed at the door. “You go! Both of you.”
As we started out, Lilly assured her, “I’ll be sending you that invitation.”
“All right. And I’ll start saving up beer bottles for you.”
We laughed. But I did whisper to Lilly, “Does she know you’re too young to drink?”
“She’s real nice. Don’t put her down.”
“I’m not.”
“And do not tell Mom that she was here.”
“Okay.”
So the ride home featured no talk about Aunt Robin, or her surprise career as a substitute teacher, or her beer-bottle wedding colors, or anything else, for that matter.
As it turned out, Mom was saving all of her talking for lunch. Over bowls of Campbell’s tomato soup (the same company that owns Pepperidge Farm, V8, and Swanson) and grilled cheese sandwiches, Mom opened with a blockbuster announcement: “I was talking to your father. I am going to start working at the Food Giant on Sunday, on the cash register.”
Lilly practically spit out her grilled cheese. “Why? I thought you had to be here for us, like a traditional housewife, so you could keep the household together, or whatever.”
