well published and some of it is well known (e.g., on the older brother effect in men’s sexual orientation). So, as an expert (ahem!), I guess I am permitted some bold, concluding statements about the causes of sexual attractions, including the origins of asexuality. But I won’t make such a bold statement about causes, because, as mentioned at the beginning of this chapter, I know that causes are tricky and complex things. For example, the etiology of asexuality may reflect multiple and interactive influences, both biological and environmental in origin. This etiology may also be best understood by resorting to both distal and proximal causes and both macro and micro influences. In addition, I hesitate to be bold because I know that the research on asexuality is just beginning. Thus, although there is tantalizing research (mostly of a proximate, micro nature), along with some intriguing speculations, regarding the origins of asexuality, we do not know what causes someone to develop as an asexual person. So, if you are asked why asexuality exists, and you reply, “Well, just because,” I suppose I would not blame you.
CHAPTER 14
The Beginning
We have reached the end of this book. Have I converted you from a sexual person to an asexual one, or from an asexual person to a sexual one? You may be laughing at this point, as I expect you know that I asked this question tongue-in-cheek. After all, our sexual attractions, or lack of them, are not easily swayed. Thus, whatever mysteries give rise to them (see chapter 13), once they are laid down, they don’t change easily.
This book was intended for a broad audience: anyone interested in understanding asexuality, and anyone interested in taking a view of human sexuality through a new lens. Toward that end, in chapter 2 I explored the constructs underlying the psychology of sexuality, which allowed us to define asexuality as a lack of sexual attraction. Exploring these constructs also provided insight into the nature of sexuality by defining its borders and revealing how related constructs such as romance and love can be decoupled from it. I also explored the biological and cultural history of asexuality in chapter 3. What do an amoeba, a famous mathematician, and Jughead Jones have in common? In chapter 4, I presented information on the prevalence of asexuality. The concern about the number of humans in various sexual groups reveals the fascination with our place on the sexual spectrum. In chapter 5, I discussed the rather delicate subject of masturbation and how it is important to understanding variation in asexuality. Later, in chapter 10, I presented evidence that some forms of asexuality in which masturbation co- occurs with persistent fantasy may constitute a paraphilia, or an unusual form of sexual attraction. I even named a new paraphilia! In chapter 6, I probed that mystery of mysteries, female sexual desire, and explored how men and women differ in their expression of sexuality, including asexuality. The forging of an asexual identity, and how it relates to the development of all identities (sexual and otherwise), was presented in chapter 7. In chapters 8 and 9, I asked the question “Is there one right way to live a human life?” My answer, after surveying the scene and trundling out a few arguments, was “no”; thus, if one is content as an asexual person, then one is probably better off than many people (if not the majority) who live in the sexualized modern Western world. Asexuality is a complex phenomenon and not easily framed as a mental problem; indeed, the case could be made that sexuality, not asexuality, is a form of madness! In chapters 11 and 12, I explored our sexual planet, and how sex is a pervasive, even insidious, influence on our lives. The examples I chose to illustrate this point were art, food, and humor, but other domains of human life are equally open to sexual analysis.
I hope that you have seen sexuality in a new light by reading this book. I have by writing it. This book has distilled for me much of the knowledge I have gained in my career as a sex educator and researcher, and I now see sexuality through a new lens because of my research on asexuality.
Finally, a few words on the title of this brief, concluding chapter: Is it truly
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