His face flickered with red light and his eyes glittered. “I wonder if you know what you’re doing, coming here like this.”
“I always know what I’m doing.” She closed the door behind her.
The click, click, click sound that had followed her down the hall ceased. There was a thump as Muffin threw himself down outside the door.
“I bribe your dog, the Muffin, with tidbits, and he lets me invade your room. He is not a good watchdog.”
“Almost perfectly useless. Can I ask why you’re here?”
“I was restless.”
He said, “So you came to be restless with me. I’m glad.”
Logs burned blue and orange on the grate. The study downstairs and three of the bedrooms used logs. The other hearths were modern and heated with coal, as was usual in London. The fire of logs made her feel as if she were at home in France. In her own apartment above the shop, her fire was made with logs.
With Hawker, she did not trouble to be proper. She sat the way a man does, cross-legged, and pulled the robe around her knees.
She wore his crimson robe de banyan. Nothing else at all. To clasp his robe upon her was to feel surrounded by masculine arms. The color warmed her like the sun. Red silk for grand gestures, for luxurious desires and recklessness.
They would talk for a while, however. She said, “Paxton has drawn the face of the Caché sniper. Did you see it?”
“When I came in. He hung a copy in the hall. I don’t recognize the face.”
“Your Ladislaus made five or six copies. I was no help at all. I must have seen her through the glasses in the courtyard of the Coach House, but I have no memory of her. It was long ago.”
“She’s probably the one who stabbed you. You might know her if you were face-to-face.”
“That is what Paxton said. He is planning to search the expensive brothels tomorrow with a pack of men and several copies of his portrait. He tells me I am not well enough to accompany him, as if he were denying me a treat.”
“No brothels for you, then.” Hawker smiled at her easily. He set his hand to her knee. It was an easy, brief encounter with her knee, as if they were still used to sitting like this, chatting back and forth. “You and me, we’ll deck ourselves out and winnow through the ton. We can hunt for a murderess among the guests at the Pickerings’ ball. That should add some interest to an otherwise dull affair.”
“I do not go to such entertainments. I will ask Séverine to lend me a dress.”
Another soft touch to her. This time he slid fingers along the lapel of the robe. “I wish you could wear this color.”
The swelling of his cock was not hidden by the caleçons, but he took no notice of it. His physical reaction to her had always seemed to amuse him more than anything else.
She was intensely aware of his smallest movement. Of his hand, as it dropped back to rest on his thigh. Of his breathing.
The red glow of the fire slid over him, appreciating the excellences of his body, lingering on hard lines of muscle. She had never met a man who made nakedness seem so natural. Always, he lived easily within his flesh, like some mythical half human, a selkie or satyr, unacquainted with modesty. He could have been a savage on one of the far islands of the world who had never been clothed.
She knew, of her own knowledge, that he made love without the least shame. Perhaps the men who lived in simplicity at the edges of the world did, also. “Do you think the Caché will be at this great party? It seems a forlorn hope.”
“If she’s in the beau monde, she should be.” He studied his own hand, as if he could add and subtract probabilities there. As if it held answers. “We missed a good many. They’re still out there, Cachés infiltrated into the best families.”
“For that girl, though, there was no rich family waiting. The Tuteurs would not have been gentle in their treatment.”
“I know. After Pax looks in on the richer side of demimonde tomorrow. I’ll take the cheaper brothels. I have old friends I can ask.” He leaned to nudge the fire, pushing at a log with the tips of his fingers. Sparks flew up. “She’s not young. We both know what life is like when a whore isn’t young anymore.”
She said, “I left her to face that.”
“We both did. Mostly me.”
“It was my operation.”
“I was the expert. You listened to me.” He shoved a log till he had it placed just right. “Years of experience later, I still say it. We couldn’t have got her out.”
“Some people one cannot save.” She had her own years of learning this. “It was her choice. She will blame us, though. It is the way of things.”
“I imagine she hates us reasonably well.”
“But even if she hates us, why destroy you, now, after so long? Why use me in this circuitous way? There is a calculation in this, Hawker, and long planning. She would . . .” The night was not chilly and the fire was hot upon her face. But she was suddenly cold. Since the stabbing she had been cold all the time. “She would direct her greatest hate to Gravois and Patelin. Yet those killings were almost merciful—one brief thrust and it is over. The deadly malice is aimed at you,
“That’s what I’m thinking.” Having perfected the fire, he settled back, his hands at rest on his knees. “I recognize hate when I see it.”
He would not be dismayed by the hatred of enemies. He could be hurt only by his friends. What she had done . . . “I do not hate you. I have not hated you for a long time.”
His narrow, ruthless face turned to her. He smiled. It was like the sun coming from behind a black and ominous thundercloud. “Do you think I don’t know that?”
On his chest, high on the shoulder, a farthing-sized mark in the shape of a star. That was where she’d shot him, long ago, on the marble stairway of the Louvre. She touched it. “I did this.”
“An accident.” He laughed, deep in his eyes. “I have that from an authoritative source.”
“You think it is funny, that I shot at you.”
“Not while it was happening, no. Looking back, it does have its humorous side.”
No one else in the entire world would be amused by being shot. Only Hawker. “We should not quibble about one small bullet.”
She rose onto her knees and leaned over to kiss him, there, on the scar. It was soft as silk and warm to the touch. Warmer than the rest of his skin. Scars left a shallow place in the body’s defensive wall. One could feel life beat close to the surface where there had been so much pain. One could feel the very Hawker of him. The stupid disregard for his own safety among the hazards of the world. Gallantry and sarcasm. The reality of Hawker.
He stroked her hair, just as if matters between them were that simple. He must have seen
“I want to take time with this.” With great authority, calmly, he pulled her against him till he held her, resting. By chance, her cheek lay against the very wound she had made in him.
He held her, both arms wrapped around her. They watched the fire, and gradually she relaxed against him.
Forty-four
HE HAD REARRANGED HIMSELF TO ENCLOSE HER, supporting her against his knee so she did not have to lean upon her wound. He stroked down her side as one would caress a lazy cat that had come to curl in the lap. There was a combination of deep appreciation and slight wariness. She found both of those arousing.
He had taken upon himself the smell of smoke when he laid the fire and played with it. He also smelled of brandy. She said, “You had good brandy for dinner.”
“Nathaniel likes the best. It’s wasted on me. I think I prefer gin.”
