started.
'Just get home. Just get home.' I said the words over and over between wrenching coughs as I drove. I wouldn't think about what had just happened. I couldn't think about what had just happened.
The drive home took fifteen minutes, but it seemed to pass in the blink of an eye. Too soon I was sitting in the driveway, trying to get ready for the scene I knew, sure as lightning follows thunder, was waiting inside for me.
Why had I been so eager to get here? I suppose I hadn't technically been all that eager. I suppose I'd just been escaping from what had happened in the parking lot with Heath.
No! I wasn't going to think about that now. And, anyway, there was probably some kind of rational explanation for everything, a rational and simple explanation. Dustin and Drew were retards—totally immature beer-brains. I hadn't used a creepy new power to intimidate them. They'd just been freaked that I'd been Marked. That was it. I mean, people were scared of vampyres.
'But I'm not a vampyre!' I said. Then I coughed while I remember how hypnotically beautiful Heath's blood had been, and the rush of desire I'd felt for it. Not Heath, but Heath's blood.
No! No! No! Blood was not beautiful or desirable. I must be in shock. That's it. That had to be it. I was in shock and not thinking clearly. Okay…okay…absently, I touched my forehead. It had stopped burning, but it still felt different. I coughed for the zillionth time. Fine. I wouldn't think about Heath, but I couldn't deny it any more. I felt different. My skin was ultrasensitive. My chest hurt, and even though I had my cool Maui Jim sunglasses on, my eyes kept tearing up painfully.
'I'm dying…' I moaned, and then promptly clamped my lips shut. I might actually be dying. I glanced up at the big brick house that, after three years, still didn't seem like home. 'Get it over with. Just get it over with.' At least my sister wouldn't be home yet—cheerleading practice. Hopefully, the troll would be totally hypnotized by his new Delta Force: Black Hawk Down video game (um…ew). I might have Mom to myself. Maybe she would understand…maybe she would know what to do.…
Ah, hell! I was sixteen years old, but I suddenly realized that I wanted nothing as much as I wanted my mom.
'Please let her understand,' I whispered a simple prayer to whatever god or goddess might be listening to me.
As usual, I went in through the garage. I walked down the hall to my room and dumped my geometry book, purse, and backpack on my bed. Then I took a deep breath and headed, a little shakily, to find my mom.
She was in the family room, curled up on the edge of the couch, sipping a cup of coffee and reading Chicken Soup for a Woman's Soul. She looked so normal, so much like she used to look. Except that she used to read exotic romances and actually wear makeup. Both were things her new husband didn't allow (what a turd).
'Mom?'
'Hum?' She didn't look up at me.
I swallowed hard. 'Mama.' I used the name I used to call her, back in the days before she married John. 'I need your help.'
I don't know whether it was the unexpected use of 'Mama' or if something in my voice touched an old piece of mom—intuition she still had somewhere inside her, but the eyes she lifted immediately from the book were soft and filled with concern.
'What is it, baby—' she began, and then her words seemed to freeze on her lips as her eyes found the Mark on my forehead.
'Oh, God! What have you done now?'
My heart started to hurt again. 'Mom, I didn't do anything. This is something that happened to me, not because of me. It's not my fault.'
'Oh, please, no!' she wailed as if I hadn't said a word. 'What is your father going to say?'
I wanted to scream how the hell would any of us know what my father was going to say, we haven't seen or heard from him for fourteen years! But I knew it wouldn't do any good, and it always just made her mad when I reminded her that John was not my 'real' father. So I tried a different tactic—one I'd given up on three years ago.
'Mama, please. Can't you just not tell him? At least for a day or two? Just keep it between the two of us until we…I don't know…get used to it or something.' I held my breath.
'But what would I say? You can't even cover that thing up with makeup.' Her lips curled weirdly as she gave the crescent moon a nervous glance.
'Mom, I didn't mean that I'd stay here while we got used to it. I have to go; you know that.' I had to pause while a huge cough made my shoulders shake. 'The Tracker Marked me. I have to move to the House of Night or I'm just going to get sicker and sicker.' And then die, I tried to tell her with my eyes. I couldn't actually say the words. 'I just want a couple of days before I have to deal with…' I broke off so I didn't have to say his name, this time purposefully making myself cough, which wasn't hard.
'What would I tell your father?'
I felt a rush of fear at the panic in her voice. Wasn't she the mom? Wasn't she supposed to have the answers instead of the questions?
'Just…just tell him that I'm spending the next couple days at Kayla's house because we have a big biology project due.'
I watched my mom's eyes change. The concern faded from them and was replaced by a hardness that I recognized all too well.
'So what you're saying is that you want me to lie to him.'
'No, Mom. What I'm saying is that I want you, for once, to put what I need before what he wants. I want you to be my mama. To help me pack and to drive with me to this new school because I'm scared and sick and I don't know if I can do it all by myself!' I finished in a rush, breathing hard and coughing into my hand.
'I wasn't aware that I had stopped being your mom,' she said coldly.
She made me feel even more tired than Kayla had. I sighed. 'I think that's the problem, Mom. You don't care enough to be aware of it. You haven't cared about anything but John since you married him.'
Her eyes narrowed at me. 'I don't know how you can be so selfish. Don't you realize all that he's done for us? Because of him I quit that awful job at Dillards. Because of him we don't have to worry about money and we have this big, beautiful house. Because of him we have security and a bright future.'
I'd heard these words so often I could have recited them with her. It was at this point in our non- conversations that I usually apologized and went back to my room. But today I couldn't apologize. Today I was different. Everything was different.
'No, Mother. The truth is that because of him you haven't paid any attention to your kids for three years. Did you know that your oldest daughter has turned into a sneaky, spoiled slut who's screwed half of the football team? Do you know what nasty, bloody video games Kevin keeps hidden from you? No, of course you don't! The two of them act happy and pretend to like John and the whole damn make-believe family thing, so you smile at them and pray for them and let them do whatever. And me? You think I'm the bad one because I don't pretend—because I'm honest. You know what? I'm so sick of my life that I'm glad the Tracker Marked me! They call that vampyre school the House of Night, but it can't be any darker than this perfect home!' Before I could cry or scream I whirled around and stalked back to my bedroom, slamming the door behind me.
I hope they all drown.
Through the too thin walls I could hear her making a hysterical call to John. There was no doubt that he'd rush home to deal with me. The Problem. Instead of sitting on the bed and crying like I was tempted to, I emptied the school crap out of my backpack. Like I'd need it where I was going? They probably don't even have normal classes. They probably have classes like Ripping Peoples Throats Out um and…and…Intro to How to See in the Dark Whatever.
No matter what my mom did or didn't do, I couldn't stay here. I had to leave.
So what did I need to take with me?
My two favorite pairs of jeans, besides what I had on. A couple of black T-shirts. I mean, what else do vampyres wear? Plus, they are slimming. I almost passed on my cute aqua-colored sparkly cami, but all that black was bound to make me more depressed…so I included it. Then I stuffed tons of bras and thongs and hair and makeup things into the side pouch. I almost left my stuffed animal, Otis the Shish (couldn't say fish when I was
