the button marked with the number one.”
Michaels mentally pushed the button.
“Above the door are the numbers for the floors of the building. Twenty is lit in red, and the elevator starts to descend. As you watch, a few seconds later, twenty blinks off and nineteen lights up, and there’s a soft chime as the elevator slowly passes the floor.
“Eighteen lights up, again, the soft chime.
“Now as the elevator slowly goes down, you begin to feel relaxed. The elevator settles very slowly, but you’re in no hurry, you’ve got all day.
“As you pass seventeen, sixteen, fifteen, you become more and more relaxed. The numbers light, the chime sounds, and you are becoming even more placid, more comfortable. There is nothing but the numbers descending, the soft tones at each floor.
“You pass fourteen, twelve, eleven, ten, nine. Save for the chime, all is quiet. The motion of the elevator is smooth, soothing.”
Her voice was a soft drone, lulling him.
“Eight, seven, six, five, four, three… two… one.
“The elevator stops. The door opens. You step out into the hall. To your right not far ahead is an open door. You walk into the room, there is nobody around, but there is a couch, long, cushy, very inviting. Lie down on the couch. You are so comfortable and relaxed you don’t feel like moving a muscle, you are practically melting into the cushions.”
“So there you are, warm, comfortable, relaxed, lying there on the couch. You aren’t sleepy, just slack. No worries, no noise, nothing to bother you. Your breathing is slow and even. Life is good.”
“You don’t need to move, but if you did need to, you could do so quickly and easily, because you are so relaxed, no tension to slow you down. Concentrate on how relaxed you are, see how it feels, see how simple it is to just lie here and be this way.”
“Here’s a little trick. To get back to this place, this relaxed, comfortable, no tension feeling, all you have to do is say to yourself out loud, ‘Relax, Alex.’ That’s all. If you say that, you’ll feel just like you feel now, no matter what is going on around you. You’ll breathe slow and easy, your muscles will hold you up, you’ll be able to move as quickly as you need to, but there won’t be any tightness in you. Just say, ‘Relax, Alex,’ and that’s what will happen.”
She waited a few seconds.
“Now, you stand up, and walk back to the elevator.
“Good. You push the call button. The doors open right away and you step inside. Push the button for the twentieth floor. The numbers start to light up, starting with one, then two… three… four. As the elevator rises, you still feel calm and relaxed, but more refreshed now, as if you have just had ten hours of sleep.
“You pass five… six… seven… but there’s no hurry.
“The lights blink, the elevator chimes softly as you pass each floor.
“You watch the numbers flash by. When the elevator gets to the twentieth floor, it stops. You take a deep breath and let it out. As the door opens, you open your eyes—”
He blinked at her.
She smiled.
“That’s it? I ride an elevator down, you tell me to relax, I ride it up?”
“Yep. How do you feel?”
“Well, I feel fine. Great.” He raised a skeptical eyebrow at her. “That’s what being hypnotized is? There’s nothing to it.”
“What, did you think you were going to turn into Frankenstein’s monster? Cluck like a chicken? Not be able to remember anything?”
“Well, yeah, okay, kinda.”
“It’s not like that. It’s a state of heightened concentration. If you do this little exercise a few more times, it will be reinforced. It’s not magic — it just allows you to focus your thoughts better. You can get pretty much the same thing by meditation or prayer.”
“And this will work?”
“Try it, next time you get tense.”
“Okay. I will. But right now, I have something else in mind.”
She laughed. “Why am I not surprised…?”
Later, when Guru had gotten home with the baby and they were all getting ready to go out for dinner at the new Mexican place, Michaels thought about the workout and hypnosis thing. That short and long knife business could be taken as a metaphor for his life. Getting in close had consequences, it was more dangerous in some ways. He had a new family, and compared to his first one, it was… different.
Toni was much more a part of his reason to get up every day than Megan, his first wife, had been. Maybe it was Toni; maybe it was only because he was older and a little wiser and able to appreciate what he had now more than he had been able to appreciate it then. He didn’t love his daughter Susie any less than he did Alex, but he certainly hadn’t been there for her in the same way. Something he’d always regret.
Whatever. But lately, work just hadn’t been calling to him the way family did. If he won the lottery tomorrow, would he still get up and go to work every day? Ten years ago, five years ago, even a year ago, he would have said yes, no question.
Now? Now, he wasn’t sure about that at all. Maybe he would take a few months off.
Maybe he would take off permanently.
It could be that part of it was because he was at the top of the mountain at Net Force. Anything higher in government was going to be some kind of political appointment, and not likely to happen. He didn’t slot neatly into either party. Most of the time, he voted Independent, sometimes one way, sometimes another, and there were times when he couldn’t bring himself to vote for
Being commander of Net Force was as good as it was going to get.
Or maybe it was a midlife crisis. He had been face-to-face with death a few times in the last couple of years, and that made a man stop and think about the meaning of it all, something he had never done much before. Being introspective wasn’t part of what he’d learned at home. When your number was up, it was up, game over, and if the old saw was true that nobody on his death bed ever said, “I wish I’d spent more time at the office,” then what exactly
Michaels realized for him, it was gonna be family first, and then work. It didn’t used to be that way, but that’s how it was now. He hadn’t noticed when that had happened, that shift, but it had.
He could understand a whole lot better now why John Howard had taken a leave and had thought seriously about retiring.
Just when he thought he had a handle on life, it went and changed on him.
Damn.
19
Jay crept through the thick woods along a deer trail with as much stealth as he could manage. This mixed
