her ears, his fingers entwined in her springy hair.
He brought his lips to hers. So soft, he thought. So gentle. He felt her arms encircle his waist; he put his arms around her, drawing her closer. She smelled fresh an springlike as lilacs. She broke off the kiss and said “That was a surprise.”
Because of the crowd it took five minutes for Jake and Callie to get near a turnstile for the ferry. They decided on their plans for the next day while two ferries filled up and left. Jake escorted her to the turnstile an she went through. Turning back toward him, she called out, “See you tomorrow!” When she smiled broadly and waved, a pleasant warmth suffused him, like the first swallow of a mellow scotch. He watched the green and white ferry slide into the fog.
By the time Jake got back to the hotel it was dark. His stomach felt queasy again. He was glad to enter the lobby and leave the hordes and the humidity behind When he got to his room he was disappointed that Sammy wasn’t there, but not surprised. He had wanted to tell him about Callie.
After a long shower he changed into fresh clothes. Feeling better, he went down to the Swiss restaurant in is the hotel, the Chesa, and had a steak and a beer. It settled his stomach. He returned to his room and, lighting up his last cigarette of the day with hands that shook slightly, watched television before going to bed.
At first he thought about Callie, replaying as best he could what they had said to each other and what they had done. Then he recalled those crowds of Asian faces, those voices. They had pressed their flesh against his. Their babble had assaulted his ears. It was as though they wanted him to know they were real.
What you try to do, Jake thought, is to keep it fuzzy in your mind that you kill real people. You pickle the bombs and you don’t see them fall and you don’t hear the explosions. You see only silent puffs of smoke sometimes and how could they kill anyone? It’s not real. You begin to think that maybe Orientals don’t breathe, don’t eat, don’t shit, can’t feel pain, don’t cry out. You begin to think they’re not real. You try to keep it fuzzy in your brain where the truth of it all resides because you know that you don’t want to kill-God, you don’t want to kill. But yet you do kill, maybe as many as fifty at a time. You have bombs and there are no fair fights and you know it’s wrong. You live with shame. It would be different if you knew that if you didn’t kill a man he would kill you, like gunfighters facing off or fighter aircraft dueling in the sky. Sometimes you get to attack those who try to kill you with flak and missiles and if you kill them you can handle it. But you have bombs. Mostly you kill those who aren’t trying to kill you. It’s the children you’ve maybe killed that give you the worst dreams of all because you can see what your bombs do to their small bodies and you can hear their screams. But you don’t really know if you’ve killed children-maybe you haven’t. You can tell yourself you haven’t unless you learn that you’ve screwed up and your bombs have hit a hospital or a school. So you try hard to keep your mind fuzzy about all this, about the truth, about what the truth might be. And you want to rip the balls off a grinning bastard who tells you how many, precisely you’ve killed.
ELEVEN
Sammy threw open the curtain and dazzling sunlight burst into the room.
“C’mon, Grafton. Get your arse moving. It’s gonna be a great day.”
Yawning, Jake said, “Arse?”
“I’ve been hanging around with the Brits. smashing guys. I “What time is it?” Grafton noticed that Lundeen’ bed had not been slept in.
“Almost ten. Lets go, matey. Up an’ at ‘em, shit an shave.”
“What’s the rush?” Jake groaned. “Where were you last night, anyway?”
“These Brits I met-Royal Navy types-fixed me up with an Aussie lassie, an airline stew who immediately recognized my sterling qualities. Couldn’t bear to spend the night without me.” Sammy rolled his eyes appreciatively. “Cool Hand, this is your lucky day She’s got a friend. A sex-starved female just dying to meet you.”
Jake rose and went into the bathroom, and Sammy came over and stood near the door. “Hey, Grafton Has it been so long you’ve forgotten what sex is? I said I got you fixed up. Had to lie a little, of course. Told her you had hundreds of females fighting each other for your bod.
But what the hell, a friend’s a friend, right?”
“Right,” said Jake. He came out of the bathroom. “I really appreciate this, but there’s a glitch. l-“
“A glitch? What’re you talking about?”
“Remember that woman I told you about yesterday?
The one who-“
“What?” said Sammy, incredulously. “You mean Miss Tea and Crumpets? You can’t be serious. I’ve got you fixed up with a real woman, also an Aussie. As good as I am, I couldn’t possibly handle them both.”
“Sure,” said Jake. “But I’ve got a commit-“
“Now look, Jake.” Sammy spoke very slowly and deliberately, as though he were speaking to a small child.
“Let me make this very clear. You can get laid today. By this voluptuous hunk of very tall blonde woman. This woman will overstress your main spar, laddy.
You know what I’m talking about. L-A-I-D.”
“Yeah,” said Jake. “But listen a goddamn minute to what-“
“Okay,” said Sammy with finality. “I got the picture.” Walking toward the door, he said, “Well, I was gonna go to breakfast with you, but I can see you’re off your rocker today and I’m starving, so I’m not gonna wait.” Sammy opened the door, then turned toward Jake. “Tell me this. Did you get into her crumpets?
“Huh? Huh? Go to hell.”
“Ha! I knew it! I rest my case.” He slammed the door.
Deciding he’d shower later, Jake shaved hurriedly. He caught Sammy at breakfast. The residue of fried eggs was on his plate. Jake ordered coffee, tomato juice, and toast with orange marmalade.
“You should’ve checked first,” said Jake. “I told you about her yesterday.”
“And just how could I do that? Anyway, how can I take seriously a broad who says she wants to meet you for tea? Tea.”
“I take her seriously. She’s all right.”
“Yeah, yeah.”
“I’d like you to meet her,” said Jake.
“Don’t see how I could fit that in. I’ve got a lot of things to do today.
Arrangements would have to be rearranged, you know?”
“Yeah, I know. I sure do appreciate what you did. But I want you to meet her. Like to know what you think.”
Sammy took two sips of coffee before answering “Well, as I said, I’ll be pretty busy today. But I’ll give consideration to it.”
When Callie called from the lobby, Jake told her that he wanted her to meet a friend of his. In the hallway Sammy said, “What the hell are crumpets, anyway?”
“Beats me.”
As they waited at the elevator, Jake said, “Be nice okay?”
“Grafton, if my little deal with the Aussie sisters falls apart because I can’t come up with another guy, your ass is grass.”
They walked into the lobby, which was brighter than Jake had ever seen it.
“Is that her,” Sammy said standing by the pillar?”
“Yep,” said Jake, returning Callie’s wave. “That her.”
Callie was wearing dark slacks and an unbuttoned white sweater over a yellow blouse. She carried a small shoulder bag.
“Not bad,” Sammy said. “Not bad at all.”
Jake wanted to hug Callie, but instead he introduced her to Sammy, who stood with his feet together and made a little bow. Callie smiled and said, “Jake told me you’re his roomie. Are you a pilot, too?”
“Yes, ma’am,” said Sammy. “I’m crazy, too.”
