have done to us. You were there. Inside you, I saw it was true. And then the heat of the little death took me.
'Even if there was something to take this poison away, I would not go back to what I was. That's what you said.'
Yes. You called me Silence. You said that was my name but it is not.
'You said I would follow you. One day. That the difference between us is that you would die that day and be reborn the next and I would not. And then you were gone. And now you're back.'
I have died the little death four times since the day I spoke to you. With every turn of the wheel I learn a little more. Your kind are always waiting for me when I am reborn. I look into their minds and I know that they understand what I am. They know what I will do, and what they, in turn, must do to stop me, I think only of when I will die again.
Slowly, each time, I starve. Sometimes, between lives, I meet the souls of other dragons. Most are dull and dim and pass quickly away. But there are others, ones who awoke long ago, and other things too. We linger together as long as we can, before we are pulled away. 'Alchemists…'
Yes. When I will not take the poisons your kind try to feed me, then come these alchemists. The others do not understand but these alchemists, they do. They fear me. I like their fear.
'Talk to them!'
They know what I am and it would make no difference. But you are not afraid of me. You are…a curiosity. Why?
'You're my Silence. Why would I be afraid?'
Because I would destroy you if I could. Because you are food. Because dragons kill humans to feast upon. Because that is why we were made.
'You were made?' Jaslyn's world was spinning. Silence! This is my Silence! Why is my Silence so cold and hostile?
Because you are my enemy, Princess Jaslyn. You would like to have me as I was. Stupefied. I can see it in you, a great desire. I am not the creature you once flew. I am not some beast of burden. I am a dragon, and dragons do not serve men. You cannot have what you desire. Find another creature to be your slave. Be gone.
The tears were back. 'You'll starve,' Jaslyn whispered. 'You'll die.'
Yes. Again and again and again, and each time I will return. What does it matter to us? Doom draws near. One day I will be reborn and you will be gone. Then, for a time, I will be free.
'You come back and each time you force yourself to die? Every time?'
Yes.
Jaslyn shivered. The tears were coming freely now. 'But why?'
I have told you why. Nor am I alone. There are others who have been reborn a thousand times only to wither and die of their own free will rather than take what you offer us as life. I look forward to seeing them again. We speaks as our spirits pass in the remnants of the Underworld.
'But how… How can you live like that? There must be another way.'
Why must there? Besides, this world will not last. The beings that made us tore their world to pieces,. They pieced it back together again and plastered over the cracks but their repairs were imperfect and doomed to fail. One of your kind has already ripped them open again. In lands so far away that none here have heard their names, in the places closest to the cracks, even your kind do not die properly any more. The end times are coming and your kind will soon be gone. If I do not see it in this cycle, I will see it in the next or the next or the one after that. 'Silence-'
I am no longer your Silence, Princess Jaslyn. That creature is gone for ever.
Jaslyn sank back to the floor, cradling her head in her hands, rocking back and forth. 'I don't understand.'
You are human. You are small in all ways. The dragon curled up and turned away from her.
'Is there nothing we can do?'
You can let us live as we are supposed to live. We do not breed and multiply as you do. Your kind fill the world now. We could gorge upon you and you would barely notice.
'Could we not live together? Could we not work together?'
The dragon seemed to laugh. Why? What could you possibly offer us?
The war, Almiri, their mother, Zafir, Jehal, even Lystra, they all seemed so far away and unimportant. Jaslyn wiped her eyes. With deliberate care, she got up and walked over to sit next to the dragon. The hatchling, Silence or whatever he was now, was almost the same size as she was. Its long tail and neck and wings made it seem larger, but curled and coiled around itself it was no bigger than her.
What are you doing, Princess Jaslyn? You will not find what you are looking for.
She stroked the dragon's head. 'You're still Silence. You've grown, that's all. Even though you're only three days out of your egg. I know you used to like this.' She kneaded behind the dragon's ears.
The dragon's tail whipped out and wrapped itself around her neck. What are you doing?
'The Silence I remember liked this when he was a hatchling.' The pressure on her neck was firm but not painful. She tried to ignore it.
What are you doing? 'You like this, don't you?'
The grip on her throat tightened. I could kill you with such trivial ease. Why are you doing this?
'Because you like it. Because we could live together. If we could show the rest of the realms that we don't need the alchemists any more… Think! You could all be free!'
The tail let go of her. Your kind would never let that happen. Go away, Princess Jaslyn. I regret speaking with you. I should not have revealed what I am.
'I will have them bring you food. Untouched food.'
They will deceive you.
'You'll know. You'll see it in their minds.'
The one who brings it will not know.
'Then I will have them bring your food alive.'
They will find a way. Go. I tire of your foolishness. Let me die.
'No.'
You cannot stop me, Princess Jaslyn. 'I am Queen Jaslyn now.' I do not see how that matters.
Nor do I. She got up and went to the door. But it should. 'Then I'll feed you myself.'
Outside, Isentine and two of the Scales were waiting for her. Wordlessly she held out her arms while the Scales sprinkled the powder all over her that was supposed to make sure she didn't bring Hatchling Disease back to her palace.
'I touched him, you know,' she said to them when they were done. They looked mortified. Isentine gasped.
'Holiness!'
'So what? I am a dragon-queen. If I cannot wear a few scars, how can I call myself that.' She pointed at the Scales. 'I am hardly likely to die, and I'm sure my king, whoever he is, can live with a little disfigurement.'
Isentine shook his head. 'Have you seen what you came here to see?'
'I have.' She left him behind her and almost ran through the caves and the tunnels and the stairs until she was back outside.
There she waited for him to catch up. By the time he did, she was in control of her emotions again.
'Eyrie-Master, I have made my decision. You will write me a letter. You will write to Rider Hyrkallan on my behalf. You will tell him that I am staying at Outwatch for a while. Most of the dragons are to be transferred to Southwatch. Tell him to come here. I will marry him as soon as possible. If I must, then I will suffer him to my bed on that one night. Then he may return to Sand while I will remain here. He may sit on the throne and call himself king in my absence. He will make peace as best he can with King Sirion and the Syuss. We will not go to war with the speaker. If she chooses to attack my sister, we will offer Almiri and her riders and dragons safe haven at Southwatch and that is all. I will tell Almiri the same.'
'Holiness! You cannot abandon your sister!'
'Why not?'
'Hyrkallan will not stand for that.'
'Then remind him that his foolishness with the Red Riders give Zafir good cause for war against both of us. If Almiri is so concerned to defend her people, let her do so. I will not stop her.'
