Jacoby was lying on his side. “My feet,” he said hoarsely.
Gene looked. Shiny green vines were wrapped about the man’s ankles. He drew his sword, followed the vines away from Jacoby’s legs, and began hacking. He heard a high-pitched scream of pain.
Gene was horrified, thinking he’d cut Jacoby. But the scream hadn’t come from Jacoby.
“Huh?” Gene froze, sword in the air. The voice seemed to come from a thick, rough-barked tree stump that sat amid a nosegay of attractive flowers nearby.
“What? Well, I’m sorry … hey, wait a minute.”
“No need to get abusive. Let go of this man here, and I’ll stop chopping.”
“Cut them!” Jacoby screamed. “The portal may close!”
“Come on, now, let him go.”
“Jesus Christ. Shades of
For God’s sake,” Jacoby shrieked. “Hurry!”
Hideous screams issued from the tree as Gene brought his sword down in a series of quick chops that left one thick tentacle-vine intact. He took a measuring swing, then brought the sword down mightily. The end of the blade hit something hard and the sword dropped from his hand, but the vine had been severed.
“Okay —
“Gimmie the sword!” Gene yelled, but Jacoby turned and ran.
Gene grabbed the ropy tentacles that had entwined themselves about his ankles. He tugged, and they tugged back.
“All I need in my life is a gay bougainvillaea, or whatever you are.”
“I’m not into … domination,” Gene grunted, straining against the plant’s incredibly strong pull. The tree stump was very near. Gene watched in fascination as the bark split down the middle and became rubbery, expanding to form a huge pulsating cavity lined with rows of wicked spikes. If the situation hadn’t been so absurd, he would have been afraid.
Suddenly Snowclaw was above him, savagely chopping at the stump. The horrid mouth closed up. After an agonized scream the voice wailed,
The vines retracted and Gene got to his feet. Snowclaw gave the thing one more hack, opening up a diagonal gash that immediately began to bleed bright pink sap.
Gene retrieved his sword, and he and Snowclaw struggled back to Linda, who was having her own problems. Vines had also snared her; however, these were thin stringy ones covered with tiny thorns that had gotten hopelessly snagged in the material of her outfit.
It took some time to chop her out. Finally they did. Holding Linda between them, they bulled their way back through the pie-shaped slice of jungle.
Jacoby had collapsed in one of two stuffed chairs beside the fireplace, fanning himself with a hand. He was breathing hard and wheezing.
“Asthma, you know,” he said. “I nearly passed out. I …” He straightened up. “Frightfully sorry I couldn’t help.”
“Yeah,” Gene said ironically, sucking on a bleeding finger.
“Oh, my God, this place is going to drive me crazy,” Linda said, collapsing into the other chair. She looked herself over. “Look at these scratches all over my arms!”
Jacoby said, “I think it was Nietzsche who said something to the effect that the person who grows bored with his life should risk it. He must have had this place in mind.”
“It’s certainly not boring!” Linda laughed. “How I wish it were.”
“Come now, it’s not all that bad.”
“You
“Oh, immensely! I wouldn’t live anywhere else — though I must admit that recently things have been getting a bit more dicey. Has something to do with the siege, I should think.”
“Any late word on what the situation is?” Gene asked.
“There are reports that the invaders have entered the keep. I haven’t heard anything beyond that. It’s sometimes difficult to get reliable information. We’ve not seen any of them in the Guest area, but it’s only a matter of time, I suppose.” Jacoby seemed suddenly to have recovered. He got up and went to Linda, took her hand. “Are you sure you’re quite all right, my dear?”
“Sure, they’re just scratches. How about you?”
“Capital.”
“What happened, by the way?”
“Oh, it was nothing, just my own pigheadedness, I’m afraid. I was sitting here dozing when that business materialized. I ignored it, but then I wanted to get to the loo, and the damn thing just wouldn’t go away, so I thought I’d risk crossing to the other side. Damned if it didn’t trap me.”
“It’s a funny portal, two-sided like that,” Linda said.
“I’ve seen its like before,” Jacoby said. “Sort of like a wedge of space instead of a flat plane. Comes in crosswise, I suspect. Of course, I don’t actually know —”
With a quiet pop, the jungle disappeared. Nothing remained on the bare stone floor but scattered dirt and a few odd leaves.
“So much for that,” Jacoby said. “Linda, my dear, I shall be forever in your debt.”
“Me? Those guys got you out.”
“Yes, of course.” Jacoby glanced at Gene. “Thank you.”
“Don’t mench.”
“You’re a woman of great courage, my dear.”
“Oh, right.”
“You give yourself so little credit. Have you had lunch?”
“Well, it was sort of interrupted.”
“The dining room’s just down the hall.”
Gene stamped his foot. “All we did was wander in a big circle. Damn!”
“I’d be delighted if you’d join me,” Jacoby said.
“Well, sure,” Linda said. “What do you say, guys?”
Gene shrugged.
“C’mon, Snowclaw,” Linda said, hooking her arm in his. “I’ll rustle up some ribs for you.”
“Y’know, there’s this other dish I like,” Snowclaw told her. “It’s made out of rendered blubber flavored with a little fish oil, and then you take some fish meal, see, and you mush it all up …”
Gene watched the three of them cross the room. He sighed, slid his sword into its scabbard. “Yeah,” he said sardonically. He moped after them.
With some puzzlement he suddenly remembered what Jacoby had screamed.
Keep — Lower Levels
Osmirik squinted, peering through the darkness ahead.
