“Can it! And you call yourselves Incarnadine.”
“Who says we aren’t?”
“Look, this mirror aspect stuff … it can’t be real.”
“
“There’s only one castle. Can’t be more than one.”
“Why not?”
“Well, it just stands to reason. Besides, the way you’re acting …”
“Who?”
“You two. Neither of you can be the real Incarnadine.”
“Get him. Let me guess. You’re the genuine article?”
“Well, shit, I ought to know who I am.”
“Now, it occurs to me that we could all say that. It’s like the problem of solipsism. I know I’m real, but who are all you robots?”
“Look, I don’t want to start splitting epistemological hairs with you. Let’s table that issue for now and face up to the possibility that we have a problem on our hands. We have a castle with thousands of aspects, each one of which can turn into a mirror of the castle itself —”
“And each of those mirror castles has 144,000 mirror aspects in
“And so on and so on, ad infinitum.”
“Ad absurdum.”
“Adirondacks. Yeah, it’s a mess. What do we do about it?”
“Not sure we can do anything about it.”
“That’s what I mean. The real Incarnadine would be furiously busy doing something about it.”
“Like you.”
“Well, I’m here.”
“So are we all.”
“Let’s not get into that again.”
More combatants joined the fray. Tables overturned, and stale food went flying.
“Who was it that came up with the idea of cloning Snowclaw in the first place?”
“Who knows? What does it matter?”
“I suppose it doesn’t.”
“See here. It seems we should do something.”
“Cast some sort of spell?”
“Yeah, but what kind of a spell would eliminate all the mirrors?”
“Whose mirrors would you be eliminating?”
“All of them.”
“But don’t you see, that would blink all of us out of existence except one, the real one.”
“We’re back to that again.”
“Well, not necessarily. We could each have our separate reality, our own pocket universe, independent of the rest.”
“Undoubtedly we do, but the notion of everything going poof is somehow unsettling to me.”
“All right, let’s not do a poof. Then what do we have? Pandemonium.”
“Wait a minute. You’re talking as if this poof spell were a foregone conclusion. Do you have such a spell?”
“Well …”
“Can you come up with one?”
“Frankly, not offhand.”
“Okay, then the poof idea is moot until we do come up with one.”
“That’s how this castle’s Incarnadine has us all beat.”
“How so?”
“There’s something going on up in the lab here. I think they have a mainframe computer working on writing a spell.”
“Something I’ve always wanted to do — use a computer to do magic.”
“Apparently the owner here has gone a long way along that path.”
“Can we get in?”
“They have the place all tricked out with anti-intruder spells and I just haven’t had the time to go up there and scotch them.”
“Maybe we should all take a crack at it.”
“I’m not sure our barging into something we know nothing about is such a good idea. They might be doing some good.”
“They might also make us all go poof.”
“That’s a possibility. Anyway, I’m game. Want to go up and at least try to see what’s going on?”
“Yeah, let’s have a go.”
“Okay. But we really should — oh, God.”
“Hi, guys!”
The latest Incarnadine wore a black leather jacket, black T-shirt, jeans, and boots. He was smoking a funny- looking wrinkled cigarette. The room filled with –4Guardsmen.
“This is getting ridiculous.”
“Hey, I’m kind of enjoying it.”
“Is the kitchen open?”
“Oh, all the castle personnel are long gone. Hiding.”
“I’m starved.”
“Well, whip something up. You’re a magician.”
“I can’t eat it when I do it myself. It’s no fun.”
“It’ll do in a pinch.”
“You do it for me.”
“I’m no cook.”
“You’re a magician! What does it matter?”
“It still takes talent.”
“True.”
“But about the laboratory business?”
“Tell you what, let’s get together for lunch in the King’s Hall first — I’m starved, too — and then we’ll all go up to the lab together and see what’s what.”
“That sounds like a fine idea. There’s one problem.”
“What?”
“Tried to do any magic yet?”
“No, why?”
“The magic’s subtly different here.”
“How can that be?”
“Well, there are a few differences among us. We’re not identical.”
“True. So, you think working any magic here is going to be a problem.”
“Major magic at least. I think we’re up to conjuring a good lunch.”
“Well, if that’s true, we all might as well go home.”
“Let’s have lunch first. Let the boys play, they’re having a good time.”
“We’ve got to get rid of those damned white-furred critters!”
“And the yellow ones.”
“Them, too. Anybody got any ideas?”
“Without major magic, we’re out of business.”
“Not necessarily. We ought to be able to compensate for the subtle factors.”
“This blasted computer stuff worries me. The owner here might be at a distinct advantage if and when he
