“I sympathise with your question, I sympathise entirely,” the girl-student broke in hotly, flushed with indignation at the major's words.
“We are wasting precious time listening to silly talk,” snapped out the lady of the house, and she looked reprovingly at her husband.
The girl pulled herself together.
“I wanted to make a statement to the meeting concerning the sufferings of the students and their protest, but as time is being wasted in immoral conversation ...”
“There's no such thing as moral or immoral,” the schoolboy brought out, unable to restrain himself as soon as the girl began.
“I knew that, Mr. Schoolboy, long before you were taught it.”
“And I maintain,” he answered savagely, “that you are a child come from Petersburg to enlighten us all, though we know for ourselves the commandment 'honour thy father and thy mother,' which you could not repeat correctly; and the fact that it's immoral every one in Russia knows from Byelinsky.”
“Are we ever to have an end of this?” Madame Virginsky said resolutely to her husband. As the hostess, she blushed for the ineptitude of the conversation, especially as she noticed .smiles and even astonishment among the guests who had been invited for the first time.
“Gentlemen,” said Virginsky, suddenly lifting up his voice, “if anyone wishes to say anything more nearly connected with our business, or has any statement to make, I call upon him to do so without wasting time.”
“I'll venture to ask one question,” said the lame teacher suavely. He had been sitting particularly decorously and had not spoken till then. “I should like to know, are we some sort of meeting, or are we simply a gathering of ordinary mortals paying a visit? I ask simply for the sake of order and so as not to remain in ignorance.”
This “sly” question made an impression. People looked at each other, every one expecting some one else to answer, and suddenly all, as though at a word of command, turned their eyes to Verhovensky and Stavrogin.
“I suggest our voting on the answer to the question whether we are a meeting or not,” said Madame Virginsky.
“I entirely agree with the suggestion,” Liputin chimed in, “though the question is rather vague.”
“
” And so do I,” cried voices. “I too think it would make our proceedings more in order,” confirmed Virginsky.
“To the vote then,” said his wife. “Lyamshin, please sit down to the piano; you can give your vote from there when the voting begins.”
“Again!” cried Lyamshin. “I've strummed enough for you.”
“I beg you most particularly, sit down and play. Don't you care to do anything for the cause?”
“But I assure you, Arina Prohorovna, nobody is eavesdropping. It's only your fancy. Besides, the windows are high, and people would not understand if they did hear.”
“We don't understand ourselves,” some one muttered. “But I tell you one must always be on one's guard. I mean in case there should be spies,” she explained to Verhovensky. “Let them hear from the street that we have music and a name-day party.”
“Hang it all!” Lyamshin swore, and sitting down to the piano, began strumming a valse, banging on the keys almost with his fists, at random.
“I propose that those who want it to be a meeting should put up their right hands,” Madame Virginsky proposed.
Some put them up, others did not. Some held them up and then put them down again and then held them up again. “Poo! I don't understand it at all,” one officer shouted. “I don't either,” cried the other.
“Oh, I understand,” cried a third. “If it's
“But what does 'yes' mean?”
“Means a meeting.”
“No, it means not a meeting.”
“I voted for a meeting,” cried the schoolboy to Madame Virginsky.
“Then why didn't you hold up your hand?”
“I was looking at you. You didn't hold up yours, so I didn't hold up mine.”
“How stupid! I didn't hold up my hand because I proposed it. Gentlemen, now I propose the contrary. Those who want a meeting, sit still and do nothing; those who don't, hold up their right hands.”
“Those who don't want it?” inquired the schoolboy. “Are you doing it on purpose?” cried Madame Virginsky wrathfully.
“No. Excuse me, those who want it, or those who don't want it? For one must know that definitely,” cried two or three voices.
“Those who don't want it — those who
“Yes, tat what is one to do, hold up one's hand or not hold it up if one doesn't want it?” cried an officer.
“Ech, we are not accustomed to constitutional methods yet!” remarked the major.
“Mr. Lyamshin, excuse me, but you are thumping so that no one can hear anything,” observed the lame teacher.
“But, upon my word, Arina Prohorovna, nobody is listening, really!” cried Lyamshin, jumping up. “I won't play! I've come to you as a visitor, not as a drummer!”
“Gentlemen,” Virginsky went on, “answer verbally, are we a meeting or not?”
“We are! We are!” was heard on all sides. “If so, there's no need to vote, that's enough. Are you satisfied, gentlemen? Is there any need to put it to the vote?”
“No need — no need, we understand.”
“Perhaps some one doesn't want it to be a meeting?”
“No, no; we all want it.”
“But what does 'meeting' mean?” cried a voice. No one answered.
“We must choose a chairman,” people cried from different parts of the room.
“Our host, of course, our host!”
“Gentlemen, if so,” Virginsky, the chosen chairman, began, “I propose my original motion. If anyone wants to say anything more relevant to the subject, or has some statement to make, let him bring it forward without loss of time.”
There was a general silence. The eyes of all were turned again on Verhovensky and Stavrogin.
“Verhovensky, have you no statement to make?” Madame Virginsky asked him directly.
“Nothing whatever,” he answered, yawning and stretching on his chair. “But I should like a glass of brandy.”
“Stavrogin, don't you want to?”
“Thank you, I don't drink.”
“I mean don't you want to speak, not don't you want brandy.”
“To speak, what about? No, I don't want to.”
“They'll bring you some brandy,” she answered Verhovensky, The girl-student got up. She had darted up several times
already.
“I have come to make a statement about the sufferings of poor students and the means of rousing them to protest.”
But she broke off. At the other end of the table a rival had risen, and all eyes turned to him. Shigalov, the man with the long ears, slowly rose from his seat with a gloomy and sullen air and mournfully laid on the table a thick notebook filled with extremely small handwriting. He remained standing in silence. Many people looked at the notebook in consternation, but Liputin, Virginsky, and the lame teacher seemed pleased.
“I ask leave to address the meeting,” Shigalov pronounced sullenly but resolutely.
“You have leave.” Virginsky gave his sanction.
The orator sat down, was silent for half a minute, and pronounced in a solemn voice,
“Gentlemen!”
“Here's the brandy,” the sister who had been pouring out tea and had gone to fetch brandy rapped out, contemptuously and disdainfully putting the bottle before Verhovensky, together with the wineglass which she