‘Me too,’ Jared said.
‘No, I think Mr Vanner needs a chat with you,’ she said quickly. ‘I’ll see you later.’
‘Are you all right?’ he asked, frowning as he glanced at her face.
‘Yes, I’m fine. Bye.’
She fled-hoping that he wouldn’t follow her, because she desperately needed to be alone to sort this out, but irrationally disappointed when he didn’t insist. He would get deep into talk about the coming race and forget her existence until she was useful again.
She took a taxi, meaning to go to the hotel, but suddenly she couldn’t bear to be enclosed by walls and she made the driver stop near a park. She would wander and try to cope with the way her world had collapsed. With all her heart she longed to deny it, but everything fitted too well. She’d been a fool. The man who always demanded his own way had made use of her.
The light was fading. She turned her steps towards the hotel, wondering what she was going to do when she saw Jared. Tell him? Ask him?
Not now, she thought. Don’t distract him the night before a race. I’ll go to bed and he’ll find me ‘asleep’. Tomorrow-when he’s won-maybe-
But as she reached the corridor Jared’s door opened, to reveal him, frowning.
‘Where have you been?’ he demanded.
‘Just-for a walk.’
‘A strange way to take an early night. I was worried about you. I dashed back to make sure you were all right, but you weren’t here.’
‘I needed to be alone for a while.’
He stood back to let her in, closing the door with a firmness that reminded her uncomfortably of a prison door slamming. This was a man she didn’t know, with a tight face and hard, suspicious eyes.
‘Alone?’ he repeated.
‘Yes. Alone.’
‘What about Tony Williams?’
‘He’s been seen around here, trying to rake up dirt about me. Are you saying you haven’t spoken to him?’
Totally stunned, she stared at him as the world disintegrated for the second time that day.
‘Answer me, Kaye. Have you been talking to that man or not? I want to know.’
‘And I’ll tell you,’ she said, in a voice that was so quiet it was dangerous. ‘But not if you speak to me like that. I will not be interrogated like a suspect-do you understand?’
Good resolutions were forgotten as her temper flared. It was a shock to find that Jared could provoke her like this, but something in his attitude had brought rage screaming to the surface.
‘Do you understand?’ she repeated.
‘Yes, I think I understand. Evidently you have something to tell me.’
‘Tony Williams came to see me at the track, spreading stories, dropping hints. I told him to leave. When he didn’t I insisted. He was rubbing his face when he left.’
‘You hit him?’
‘Twice. I didn’t mean to, but he was saying things about you that I couldn’t bear. Now I’m going to bed.’
‘What things?’
She took a long breath. ‘Now isn’t the time,’ she said at last.
‘Kaye, what did-?’
‘Goodnight, Jared.’
‘No!’ He seized her arm as she tried to pass. ‘We can’t leave it like this.’
‘We can, because I don’t want to talk tonight.’
‘Do you think you can just walk out on me like this? Do you think I’ll allow it?’
‘I’m not asking you to allow anything. I don’t need your permission. Just for once you’re not in charge, Jared.’
He flinched as though she’d struck him over the heart, and when she turned away he didn’t try to stop her. She ran to her own room, slammed her fists against the wall and stayed there, motionless, for a time she couldn’t count.
As last she pulled away and went to sit in a chair by the window. Outwardly she was calm, but inside she was sobbing.
There was a knock at her door. ‘Please let me in.’
‘Go away.’
‘No. I’ll stay here all night if I have to.’
Wearily she unlocked the door, immediately returning to the chair and sitting facing away from him.
He entered quietly, coming over and dropping to one knee beside her chair.
‘Forgive me,’ he murmured. ‘I should never have spoken to you like that.’
He pressed his face against her. She could feel his warmth, but he still felt a million miles away. She didn’t move.
After waiting for her to enclose his head in her hands he drew back, understanding the silent message.
‘Tell me,’ he murmured. ‘I have to know everything.’
‘All right.’ She sighed. ‘Tony Williams came to the pits today. I think he was waiting to get me alone. He told me about the mumps and how it could have left you sterile. He said he knew someone who’d gone looking up old girlfriends, hoping to find that he was already a father.’ She gave a bleak laugh. ‘Who could imagine that?’
He flinched, rising to his feet, needing to get away from the blast of hostility that came from her, cursing himself for stupidity and blindness.
‘You never told me the name of your illness, but it
‘Yes.’
‘And it left you sterile?’
‘Yes.’ His voice was almost inaudible.
‘That day you turned up suddenly, it wasn’t an accident, was it?’
‘No.’
‘How long had you known about Mike?’
‘Only a short time. Hal showed me a picture of his family and you were in it. He told me about Mike and I realised-’
‘That he was your son.’
‘I thought he could be. Hal mentioned his birthday party, and the date told me he’d been born nine months after we were together.’
‘You remembered the date that well? Oh, but of course-it was three
