Not too many prostituting women got past twelve without

being sexual y abused, and not too many were childless, and

not too many lived lives as teenagers and adults without men

abusing them: “I was into drugs, in the limelights and the

glamorous life, and thought I was bet er than the whores on

the streets ’cause what I did was drove fancy cars and travel

around in airplanes, al this shit, but I was stil in the same pain

as everybody else, [and] instead of using men I started using

women for whatever my needs was. ” The media antifeminists

are not unlike the woman-using prostitutes and the strung-out

mothers - their venom goes in the direction of other women

because it is easier than taking on men. Is this ever going to

stop?

154

Immoral

People play life as if it’s a game, whereas each step is a real

step. The shock of being unable to control what happens,

especially the tragedies, overwhelms one. Someone dies;

someone leaves; someone lies. There is sickness, misery, loneliness, betrayal. One is alone not just at the end but al the time. One tries to camouflage pain and failure. One wants

to believe that poverty can be cured by wealth, cruelty by

kindness; but neither is true. The orphan is always an orphan.

The worst immorality is in apathy, a deadening of caring

about others, not because they have some special claim but

because they have no claim at al .

The worst immorality is in disinterest, indifference, so that

the lone person in pain has no importance; one need not feel

an urgency about rescuing the suffering person.

The worst immorality is in dressing up to go out in order

not to have to think about those who are hungry, without

shelter, without protection.

The worst immorality is in living a trivial life because one

is afraid to face any other kind of life - a despairing life or an

anguished life or a twisted and difficult life.

155

Heartbreak

The worst immorality is in living a mediocre life, because

kindness rises above mediocrity always, and not to be kind

locks one into an ethos of boredom and stupidity.

The worst immorality is in imitating those who give nothing.

The worst immorality is in conforming so that one fits in,

smart or fashionable, mock-heroic or the very best of the very

same.

The worst immorality is accepting the status quo because

one is afraid of gossip against oneself.

The worst immorality is in selling out simply because one

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