I bite my lip. Could that explain his disappearance the other day on that mysterious “business?”
“So, what happened?” I ask. Something in his stance draws me to him. I place my hand on his forearm and gasp. He’s trembling. “Vadim, tell me.”
“My petition stalled. Blocked, in fact, though the reasoning why was unclear. My lawyers assured me they could have the hold-up dealt with swiftly… But the other day, I learned the real obstacle barring me.”
He turns around, his expression shaped by such pain... I step into him, caressing the stern line of his jaw. I give him time to speak, sensing that whatever he means to say is hard for him to put into words.
“The person who blocked the adoption did so on the grounds of claiming to be Magda’s biological mother.”
“What?” My eyes go wide as a million implications come crashing down all at once. Irina? Some other mysterious woman? Overwhelmed, I stagger to the bed and sit down. “Is it the truth? C-can they prove it?”
“I don’t know.” He sits beside me and takes my hand, gripping it tightly. “I spent two days in the state of her birth, trying to learn the answers to those very questions. With all the fucking legal hurdles, I didn’t get anywhere. But unless the petitioner comes forward and files in person, they still have no claim.”
“But it’s still a hurdle,” I croak, panic constricting my throat. God, it’s like what happened at my church all over again. An adoption ruined on a selfish whim—but not my own. Right? Wrong. Even after a few short days… “Could it be her?” I ask, my voice breaking. “Magda’s mother? …Irina?”
He glances at me sharply, his eyes flashing with a million emotions ranging from suspicion to…resignation? I sense the bricks of his wall shifting, fighting to reform. At the last second, they fall, leaving his emotions accessible, as volatile as they are.
“So, you did hear,” he says softly. “I don’t know if it’s her. But… She wasn’t well back then—” He frowns at the memory as his grip on my hand grows firmer by the second, tightening to the point of pain. It takes everything I have not to pull away, for his sake. Lost among the shadows of his past, I sense he needs physical contact now more than ever.
“I wasn’t either. You don’t understand what it’s like. I can’t explain. But, if this is her, she isn’t hiding out of shame I can tell you that. The girl I knew, she was broken. In her world, everything was a game. She needed that mindset, but I indulged her. Too much, I indulged her. If I had the choice, I’d pray to whatever God would listen that Magda isn’t hers.”
I swallow thickly. There goes my jealousy, at least, though I’m not sure if I like the emotion that replaces it. Fear? I listen to him ramble, hopelessly confused—but I don’t have the heart to prod for more. This seems to be the only way he can explain this at all—in disjointed bursts of information with little context sprinkled in between.
“Could it be her?” He shakes his head slowly. “Who knows.”
“But why not come see her? Why not visit her first? And if they aren’t her mother, who would be so cruel?”
“I don’t know,” Vadim insists. “But one thing could strengthen my claim over her, biological mother or not.”
“You mean claim that you’re her father to the courts?”
“No. Something even better.” He draws my hand to his mouth, planting a kiss over the knuckles. His eyes practically glow as they meet mine, brimming with conviction. Alarm bells go off at the back of my mind, even as my body heats in response to the naked passion conveyed in that one, searing glance.
Damn. I half-expect my clothing to melt, reduced to ashes by his desire alone.
“If I can prove that I can provide a stable home for her, no one could take her away,” he says carefully. “And, if you join my adoption petition. Marry me for real...”
Mental overload. It’s too much seriousness at one time. My brain can’t cope. All I can do is laugh, pulling my hand away as I lurch to my feet.
“We could ask Maxim to make his wedding a double,” I suggest, laughing. “His fiancée said they haven’t planned much. I’m sure they’d be down for it.”
I’m smiling, but as the seconds tick by, he doesn’t return it.
“I would marry you in tandem with whoever you wanted,” he swears in a voice that robs my lungs of air. “As long as you said yes.”
I sway, stunned. He sounds too damn serious. Too convinced in the madness of his plan.
“Vadim… You don’t even know me.”
“I know enough to know I’m not making a rash decision,” he insists, rising to his height, stepping into me. “I know that you care for Magda already. I know she’s warming to you more than she ever might to me. I know I need you. And…I know that you care for me as well.”
My cheeks flame. I can’t even deny it. My only course of action is to parry his passion with logic. “So, you railroad me into another marriage without even feigning the guise of love first? At least Jim gave me that.” I don’t know why I’m so angry. Because I am. Angry and hurt and torn by his dilemma. Could I even refuse him in these circumstances? That’s the scary part. I’m not sure I can. “You should have told me what was going on sooner,” I insist, changing tact to something I feel more comfortable punishing him over. “I could have comforted you. I could have understood why you left, and I could have helped you smooth things over with Magdalene.”
“I’m telling you now.” His voice is sin, soothing through my frustration like a salve. Too fast. I’m melting into him before
