Dead Witch Walking

I settled back on the stool, and the bartender handed me my license along with a dead man's float and a spoon: a dollop of ice cream in a short glass of Bailey's. Yum. Tucking the card away, I gave him a saucy wink. I left the glass where it was, turning as if scoping out the patrons that had just come in. My pulse increased and my fingertips tingled. Time to go to work.

A quick look around to make sure no one was watching, and I tipped my glass. I gasped as it spilled, and my distress wasn't entirely faked as I lurched to catch it, trying to save at least the ice cream.

The kick of adrenaline shook me as the woman bartender met my apologetic smile with her patronizing one. The jolt was worth more to me than the check I found shoved into my desk every week. But I knew the feeling would wane as fast as it had come. My talents were being wasted. I didn't even need a spell for this one.

If this was all the I.S. would give me, I thought, maybe I should blow off the steady pay and go out on my own. Not many left the I.S., but there was precedence. Leon Bairn was a living legend before he went independent—then promptly got wasted by a misaligned spell. Rumor had it the I.S. had been the one to put the price on his head for breaking his thirty-year contract. But that was over a decade ago. Runners went missing all the time, taken out by prey more clever or luckier than them. Blaming it on the I.S.'s own assassin corps was just spiteful. No one left the I.S. because the money was good and the hours were easy, that's all.

Yeah, I thought, ignoring the whisper of warning that took me. Leon Bairn's death was exaggerated. Nothing was ever proven. And the only reason I still had a job was because they couldn't legally fire me. Maybe I should go out on my own. It couldn't be any worse than what I was doing now. They would be glad to see me leave. Sure, I thought, smiling. Rachel Morgan, private runner for hire. All rights earnestly upheld. All wrongs sincerely avenged.

I knew my smile was misty as the woman obligingly swiped her towel between my elbows to mop up the spill. My breath came in a quick sound. Left hand dropping, I snatched the cloth, tangling her in it. My right swung back, then forward with my cuffs, clicking them about her wrists. In an instant it was done. She blinked, shocked. Damn, I'm good.

The woman's eyes widened as she realized what had happened. 'Blazes and condemnation!' she cried, sounding elegant with her Irish accent. Hers wasn't faked. 'What the 'ell do you think you're doin'?'

The jolt flared to ash, and a sigh slipped from me as I eyed the lone scoop of ice cream that was left of my drink. 'Inderland Security,' I said, slapping my I.S. identification down. The rush was gone already. 'You stand accused of fabricating a rainbow for the purpose of misrepresenting the income generated from said rainbow, failure to file the appropriate requisition forms for said rainbow, failure to notify Rainbow Authority of said rainbow's end —'

'It's a lie!' the woman shouted, contorting in the cuffs. Her eyes darted wildly about the bar as all attention focused on her. 'All a lie! I found that pot legally.'

'You retain the right to keep your mouth shut,' I ad-libbed, digging out a spoonful of ice cream. It was cold in my mouth, and the hint of alcohol was a poor replacement for the waning warmth of adrenaline. 'If you forego your right to keep your mouth shut, I will shut it for you.'

The bartender slammed the flat of his hand on the counter. 'Cliff!' he bellowed, his Irish accent gone. 'Put the Help Wanted sign in the window. Then get back here and help me.'

'Yeah, boss,' came Cliff's distant, I-couldn't-care-less shout.

Setting my spoon aside, I reached across the bar and yanked the leprechaun over the counter and onto the floor before she got much smaller. She was shrinking as the charms on my cuffs slowly overpowered her weaker size spell. 'You have a right to a lawyer,' I said, tucking my ID away. 'If you can't afford one, you're toast.'

'You canna catch me!' the leprechaun threatened, struggling as the crowd's shouts became enthusiastic. 'Rings of steel alone canna hold me. I've escaped from kings, and sultans, and nasty little children with nets!'

I tried to finger-curl my rain-damp hair as she fought and wrestled, slowly coming to grips that she was caught. The cuffs shrank with her, keeping her confined. 'I'll be out of this—in—just a moment,' she panted, slowing enough to look at her wrists. 'Aw, for the love of St. Pete.' She slumped, sending her eyes over the yellow moon, green clover, pink heart, and orange star that decorated my cuffs. 'May the devil's own dog hump your leg. Who squealed about the charms?' Then she looked closer. 'You caught me with four? Four? I didn't think the old ones still worked.'

'Call me old-fashioned,' I said to my glass, 'but when something works, I stick with it.'

Ivy walked past, her two black-cloaked vamps before her, elegant in their dark misery. One had a bruise developing under his eye; the other was limping. Ivy wasn't gentle with vamps preying on the underage. Remembering the pull from the dead vamp at the end of the bar, I understood why. A sixteen-year-old couldn't fight that. Wouldn't want to fight that.

'Hey, Rachel,' Ivy said brightly, looking almost human now that she wasn't actively working. 'I'm heading uptown. Want to split the fare?'

My thoughts went back to the I.S. as I weighed the risk of being a starving entrepreneur to a lifetime of running for shoplifters and illegal-charm sellers. It wasn't as if the I.S. would put a price on my head. No, Denon would be thrilled to tear up my contract. I couldn't afford an office in Cincinnati, but maybe in the Hollows. Ivy spent a lot of time down here. She'd know where I could find something cheap. 'Yeah,' I said, noting her eyes were a nice, steady brown. 'I want to ask you something.'

She nodded and pushed her two takes forward. The crowd pressed back, the sea of black clothing seeming to soak up the light. The dead vamp at the outskirts gave me a respectful nod, as if to say 'Good tag,' and with a pulse of emotion giving me a false high, I nodded back.

'Way to go, Rachel,' Jenks chimed up, and I smiled. It had been a long time since I'd heard that.

'Thanks,' I said, catching sight of him on my earring in the bar's mirror. Pushing my glass aside, I reached for my bag, my smile widening when the bartender gestured it was on the house. Feeling warm from more than the alcohol, I slipped from my stool and pulled the leprechaun stumbling to her feet. Thoughts of a door with my name painted on it in gold letters swirled through me. It was freedom.

'No! Wait!' the leprechaun shouted as I grabbed my bag and hauled her butt to the door. 'Wishes! Three wishes. Right? You let me go, and you get three wishes.'

I pushed her into the warm rain ahead of me. Ivy had a cab already, her catch stashed in the trunk so there would be more room for the rest of us. Accepting wishes from a felon was a sure way to find yourself on the wrong end of a broomstick, but only if you got caught.

'Wishes?' I said, helping the leprechaun into the backseat. 'Let's talk.'

Two

'What did you say?' I asked as I half turned in the front seat to see Ivy. She gestured helplessly from the back. The rhythm of bad wipers and good music fought to outdo each other in a bizarre mix of whining guitars and hiccuping plastic against glass. 'Rebel Yell' screamed from the speakers. I couldn't compete. Jenks's credible imitation of Billy Idol gyrating with the Hawaiian dancer stuck to the dash didn't help. 'Can I turn it down?' I asked the cabbie.

'No touch! No touch!' he cried in an odd accent. The forests of Europe, maybe? His faint musky scent put him as a Were. I reached for the volume knob, and he took his fur-backed hand from the wheel and slapped at me.

The cab swerved into the next lane. His charms, all gone-bad by the look of them, slid across the dash to spill onto my lap and the floor. The chain of garlic swinging from the rearview mirror hit me square in the eye. I gagged as the stench fought with the odor of the tree-shaped cardboard, also swinging from the mirror.

'Bad girl,' he accused, veering back into his lane and throwing me into him.

'If I good girl,' I snarled as I slid back into my seat, 'you let me turn music down?'

The driver grinned. He was missing a tooth. He would be missing another one if I had my way. 'Yah,' he said.

'They talking now.' The music fell to nothing, replaced by a fast-talking announcer shouting louder than the music had been.