‘I asked you what wouldn’t he understand?’ I said, turning to meet her eyes. ‘You tell me. Just what wouldn’t he understand?’
‘He doesn’t like me going around with other men.’
‘Why? Doesn’t he trust you?’
She remained silent and stiff, her eyes searching my face.
‘Does he think you’ll be unfaithful if you go out with some other man?’ I demanded.
‘Ches! What is the matter? Why are you so angry? Why are you speaking to me like this?’
‘Would he think you’d be unfaithful to him if you went out with me?’
‘I don’t know. Ches, please, I don’t like this. If you are going on like this I’m going to leave you.’
‘Why don’t you like it?’ I said, suddenly furious. ‘What’s the matter with facing facts? You’re a married woman, aren’t you? You’re not a virgin. You must know what a man thinks when a girl as lovely as you brings him to a lonely spot like this where there’s no one about and at night. Or are you so dumb you don’t know?’
She flinched back, her expression changing to shocked anger.
I leaned forward to stare at her.
‘Are you in love with me, Lucille?’
She stiffened.
‘In love with you? Why, no. What are you saying, Ches?’
The black bile of disappointment made me a little crazy.
‘Then why bring me here? Why did you force yourself on me?’ I demanded, my voice rising. ‘What do you imagine I am? Do you think I’m made of stone?’
‘I’m going…’
She started to her feet. I reached out, grabbed her wrist and jerked her to me. She fell across my knees, her back arched, her face close to mine as I bent over her.
‘Ches! Let me go!’
‘I’m not made of stone,’ I said, the blood hammering in my temples. I tried to get my mouth down on hers, but she began to struggle and I found her surprisingly strong. For a long, horrible moment I tried to subdue her. Then she got one hand free and struck me violently across my face.
The blow brought me to my senses.
I let go of her. She rolled clear of me and scrambled to her feet.
I sat there on the hot sand staring at her, my breathing fast.
She turned and ran towards the car.
I remained still, staring towards the sea, then I heard the engine of the Cadillac start up.
I got quickly to my feet.
The Cadillac was moving.
‘Lucille! Don’t… Lucille!’
The car engine roared, then the car lurched into a wild, skidding circle and went away fast along the beach road.
‘Lucille!’
I started to run, then stopped.
I stood motionless, my fists clenched, and listened to the steady roar of the car engine until it had died away.
CHAPTER FOUR
I
IT took me about forty minutes to walk back to my bungalow.
As I walked, I brooded over the scene I had had with Lucille. I told myself I must have been out of my mind to have done what I had done. It would serve me right if she went straight to Aitken and told him. Probably at this very moment she was telling him. I was too sick with myself to care. Again and again I saw her look of startled surprise when I had asked her if she loved me, and again and again I heard her reply: the words kept hammering in my mind.
My bungalow stood in a little garden, fifty yards from thesea. The nearest house was a quarter of a mile farther along the road: a house owned by a wealthy broker, Jack Seaborne, who only came for a month in the summer.
As I walked up the path from the beach, I saw there was car parked before my front gate. I had only to take a few more steps up the path to see it was my Cadillac.
Then Lucille appeared from out of the shadows.
‘Ches…’
I came to an abrupt stop, staring at her.
‘I’ve brought your car back,’ she said in a small voice.
She too had stopped. A couple of yards separated us.
‘Lucille, I’m sorry. I really am. I lost my head…’
‘Don’t talk about it.’
‘I’ll take you home.’
‘Could we go inside first? There’s something I must tell you.’
‘Better not. Come on. I’ll take you home. You can tell me in the car.’
She lifted her thick hair off her shoulders with a movement that hinted oddly of despair.
‘Please, can’t we go inside for a moment?’
She was standing in the full light of the moon. She looked tense and there was a terror in her eyes that frightened me.
‘We’ll talk as I drive. You’ve got to get back…’ I stopped short as she began to sway. Her eyes suddenly rolled back and her knees buckled. I jumped forward as she began to fall and I caught her in my arms.
‘Lucille! For God’s sake! What is it?’
She collapsed against me, and I let her down gently to the ground. Kneeling beside her, her head against my chest, I held her to me. Her head dropped back. In the moonlight, she looked as white as a ghost. She looked so bad she frightened me.
Then her eyelids fluttered and opened. She stared up at me, then she tried to sit up.
‘Take it easy,’ I said. ‘Don’t move…’
She rested her head against my shoulder and closed her eyes. I put my hand under her knees and lifted her. She was lighter than I expected her to be. I had no trouble carrying her up the path to the front entrance to the bungalow.
‘I’ll be all right now,’ she said. ‘Let me down. I’m sorry. I’ve never done this before.’
I set her down, holding her against me as I groped for my I found it, opened the door, then I picked her up again and carried her into the lounge. I laid her on the divan by the window.
‘Stay quiet,’ I said, and leaving her I went back into the hall and shut the front door. Then I came back and turned on the lights in the lounge.
She lay still, staring up at the ceiling, her eyes like holes cut from a sheet.
‘I’ll get you a drink,’ I said. ‘I can’t say how sorry I am I behaved like this. A drink will pull you together.’
‘I don’t want one,’ she said and covered her face with her hands. She began to cry.
I went over to the liquor cabinet, poured a little brandy into a glass and took it over to her.
‘Drink this. It’ll pull you together.’
‘No, please.’ She turned her head away. ‘Ches, I’m terribly sorry. I’ve damaged your car.’
