Even The Vampires Get The Blues

lovemaking.'

'You say that like there's something wrong with fucking.'

'Of course there's nothing wrong with it. Even people deeply in love can indulge in it. But one is pure physical pleasure, while the other has a deeper meaning. Lovemaking is more than just sex—the pleasure received from it comes not just from sexual stimulation, but from sharing something profound with a person who is more than just a casual acquaintance. Lovemaking is just that—making something, creating a bond, forming a loving relationship.'

He shot me an annoyed look. 'You are using a woman's typical arguments. Until you've tried it my way, you can't make a statement like that.'

'The same could be said for you making generalizations against love. Boy, you are so lucky I'm not in love with you. You'd have some serious shaping up to do.'

'That is a moot point. You are not in love with me, nor I you, but I would be quite willing to show you the pleasure I could give you sexually.'

'You're still saying you want to screw me?'

A muscle in his jaw twitched. 'I wasn't going to put it quite so crudely, but yes. I want you in a sexual sense.'

'Why?'

'Why?' he asked, confused.

'Yes, why do you want me? That is, what about me is attractive to you?'

The annoyance that flared in his eyes had me smiling to myself. 'You intrigue me. I find you stimulating, both physically and mentally. And… er… you smell nice.'

'I smell nice?' I tipped my head to the side to sniff myself.

His eyes flickered my way for a moment. 'Yes. You smell like a woman, untainted by harsh chemical scents. You smell like a sun-warmed field of wild-flowers.'

'Wow,' I said, momentarily rendered speechless by his comment. 'That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said about me.'

'Your scent permeates the air around you,' he added.

'I take it back—that just makes me sound like I have gas.' I did another covert sniff of myself, but didn't notice any sun-warmed wildflower smell being emitted from any part of me.

'On the contrary, your natural scent is very pleasing. Very arousing. That's why I want you, and that is why I offered what I did.'

I sat wordless for another few minutes before finally saying, 'All right.'

He slowed the car down to a stop right in the middle of a windswept stretch of road. 'All right? You wish to have sex?'

'Well, not right this second, but yes, I will go to bed with you. You can do your best with me. But when it ends up being a hollow experience and my mind goes drifting off on its own, I'm going to let you know.'

'I accept your terms,' he said, setting off again.

'The only reason I'm doing this is because I have a point to prove to you,' I said, which was mostly true. I still didn't really understand why I was willing to do this; I wasn't like Clare, falling in love with a new man every week. It took months for my emotions to ripen to a point where I found a man sexually stimulating.

But there was just something about him, something that seemed to call out to me, something that needed me…

'As I have with you.'

'There's no way that sex without affection can possibly be better than sex with it. And although I can't show you that for yourself, I can certainly prove to you that your way is not going to work for me.'

His lips quirked upward. 'I have no doubt that there will be little difficulty in showing you the delights in a wholly physical relationship unencumbered by any emotional expectations beyond that of sexual satisfaction.'

'In your dreams,' I muttered to myself, half annoyed with his arrogant attitude, half aroused just by the thought of sleeping with him.

'We'll explore fantasy role-playing later,' he said, and I spent a long time after that wondering just what his grin meant.

Chapter 4

The remainder of the drive to Paen's home was anti-climactic (literally, but we won't go there). I was momentarily surprised to see that the castle I had astrally visited was his.

'It's just like I saw when I was floating around,' I said as he drove across a long causeway that connected a tiny little island with land. 'I had no idea you lived in a castle. Wow. It's really impressive. It's… er… not haunted or anything, is it?'

'Haunted?' Paen frowned. 'Why do you think it would be haunted?'

'Aren't most castles?'

'Mine isn't.'

'Oh. How old is it?'

He spent the time it took us to circle around the castle to a parking area at the back to give me a quick history of the place. By the time he escorted me into the main building, I knew it was approximately six hundred years old, had been inherited by his father via his grandmother's mortal family, and although it was beset with a dampness issue that no amount of modern technology could seem to fix, it housed nothing more extraordinary than a family of vampires.

Which, I suppose, was pretty extraordinary when you considered it.

'How many people does it take to keep up a castle?' I asked as he walked me through a huge hall.

'We have a day staff of four—two inside, and two outdoors.'

'Ah. And nighttime?'

'None of the staff remains after dark,' he answered, shooting me an unreadable look.

'Oh, right. That's when you guys do your thing.' I stopped for a moment and looked at Paen. He turned back to see what was keeping me. 'Do you miss the daylight?'

A tiny little frown wrinkled his brow. 'Miss it? What do you mean?'

'Well, you're up at night rather than day. I wondered if you missed it.'

'I am up no later than noon each day,' he answered, looking oddly hurt. 'I keep late hours, yes, but I assure you that I don't spend my life in darkness.'

'Oh. I thought all vamps were nighttime only. So you don't miss being able to go outside in the sun? You don't… you know, brood about being a Dark One, not being able to do things other people can do?'

'Good lord, no. I don't brood about anything. I am perfectly happy being what and who I am,' he said, giving me a mildly annoyed look. 'To do otherwise would be a waste of time.'

'But… you have no soul,' I said, following him through a door. 'I may not have been around any Dark Ones before, but even I can tell there's something missing in you. It's like your insides are made of ice. Doesn't that bother you?'

'Not at all. I may lack a soul, but I have not allowed that to hinder me in any way,' he said, turning to wave a hand around the room. 'You said you wanted to see the house. This is the library. My father is seldom home to use it, so it's really my room.'

'It's lovely. Very comfortable,' I said, looking around. It was a typical room of its sort—floor-to-ceiling bookcases lining two walls, dark leather furniture gathered around a fireplace, long, heavy (assumedly light- inhibiting) curtains framing huge windows and a pair of French doors, and a familiar desk lurking at the opposite end of the room—familiar because this was the room my brain had zipped off to while Paen was snacking on me.

It was interesting that I had been sent to this place earlier. 'Can you guys disappear?'

Paen just stared at me.

'Is that a no?' I asked.