hunter in the arena, some, of whose arrows, fired from a distance, have gone home: he comes nearer, because the beast is wounded, and brandishes his hunting-spear. 'To think that I ever called you friend, that I ever dined at your board, that I ever allowed myself to be deceived by 'your affable ways, your noble descent, the favour and confidence that you have falsely won from our gracious Emperor sand all honest citizens. Beast that you are filthy pathic, satyr of the stews! Bland corrupter of the loyal hearts and manly bodies of the very soldiers to whose trust the sacred person of our Caesar, the safety of the. City, the welfare of the world is committed. Where were you ion the might of the Emperor's birthday that you could not attend the banquet to which you were invited? Sick, were you? Mighty sick, I have no doubt. I shall soon confront the court with a selection of your fellow invalids, young soldiers of the Guards, who caught their infection from you, you filth.'
There was a great deal more of this. Asiaticus had turned dead white now, and great drops of 'sweat stood on his brow. The chain clanked, as he wiped them away. He was forbidden by the rules of the court to answer a word until the time came for him to make his defence, but at last he burst out in a hoarse voice: `Ask your own sons, Suilius ! They will admit that I am a man.' He was called to order. Suilius went on to speak of Asiaticus's adultery with Poppaea, but put little emphasis on -this, as if it was the weakest point of his case, though really it was the strongest; and so tricked Asiaticus into making a general denial of all the charges against him. If Asiaticus had been wise he would have admitted the adultery and denied the, other charges. But. he denied everything, so his guilt seemed proved. Suilius called his witnesses, mostly soldiers. The chief witness; a young recruit from South Italy, was asked to identify Asiaticus. I suppose that he had been coached to recognize Asiaticus by his bald head, for he picked on Pallas as the man who had so unnaturally abused him. A great burst of laughter went up: Pallas was known to share with me a real hatred of this sort of vice, and, besides, everyone knew that he had acted as guest-master throughout my birthday banquet.
I nearly dismissed the case then and there, but reflected that the witness might have a bad memory for faces - I have myself - and that the other charges were not disproved by his failure to identify Asiaticus. But it was in a milder, voice that I asked Asiaticus to answer Suilius's charges, point by point. He did so, but failed to account satisfactorily for his movements in France, and certainly perjured himself over the Poppaea business. The charge of corrupting the Guards I regarded as unproved. The soldiers testified in a formal, stilted way which suggested that they, had learned the testimony off by heart beforehand, and when I, questioned them merely repeated the same evidence. But then I have never heard a Guardsman testify in any other tones, they make a drill of everything.
I ordered everyone out of the room but Vitellius, young Pompey, and Pallas - Messalina had burst into tears and hurried off some minutes before - and told them that I would not sentence Asiaticus without first securing their approval. Vitellius said that, frankly, there seemed no reasonable doubt of Asiaticus's guilt, and that he was as shocked and grieved as I was: Asiaticus was a very old friend and had been a favourite of my mother Antonia's, who had used her interest at court to advance them both. Then he had had a most distinguished career and had never hung back where patriotic duty called: he had been one of the volunteers who came to Britain with me, and- though he had not arrived in time for the battle, that was the fault of the storm, not due to any cowardice on his part. So if he had now become mad and betrayed his own past it would not be showing too much clemency to allow him to be his own executioner: of course, strictly, he deserved to be hurled from the Tarpeian Rock, and to have his corpse dishonoured by being dragged off by a hook through the mouth and thrown into the Tiber. Vitellius told me too, that Asiaticus had practically confessed his guilt by sending him a message, as soon as he was arrested, begging him for old friendship's sake to secure his acquittal or, if it came to the worst, permission to commit suicide. Vitellius added: `He knew that you would give him a fair trial: you have never.' failed to give anyone a fair trial. So how ; could my intercession be expected to help him? If he was guilty, then he would be pronounced guilty; or if he was innocent, he would be acquitted.' Young Pompey protested that no mercy should be shown Asiaticus; but perhaps he was thinking; of his own safety. Assario and the Tristonia sisters, his relations, had, been mentioned as Asiaticus's accomplices, and he wished to prove his own loyalty.
I sent a message to Asiaticus to inform him that I was adjourning the trial for twenty-four hours, and that, meanwhile, he was released from his fetters. He would surely understand that message. Meanwhile Messalina had hurried to Poppaea to tell her that Asiaticus was on the point- of being condemned, and advised her to forestall her own trial and execution by immediate suicide. I knew nothing about this.
Asiaticus died courageously enough. He spent his last day-winding up his affairs, eating and drinking as usual, and taking a walk in the Gardens of Lucullus (as they were still called), giving instructions to the gardeners about the trees and flowers and fishpools. 'When he found that they had built his funeral pyre close I to a fine avenue of hornbeams he was most indignant and fined the freedman responsible for choosing the site a quarter's pay. `Didn't you realize, idiot, that the breeze would carry the flames into the foliage of those lovely old trees and spoil the whole appearance of the Gardens?' His last words to his family before the surgeon severed an artery in his leg and let him bleed to death in a warm bath were, 'Good-bye, my-dear-friends. It would have been less ignominious to have died by the dark artifices of Tiberiuss or the fury of Caligula, than now to fall a sacrifice to the imbecilic credulity of Claudius, betrayed by the woman I loved and by the friend I trusted.' For he was now convinced that Poppaea and Vitellius had arranged for the prosecution.
Two days later I asked Scipio to dine with me, and inquired after his wife's health, as a tactful way of indicating that if he still loved Poppaea and was- ready to forgive her, I would take no further action in the matter. 'She's dead, Caesar,' he answered, and began sobbing with his head in his hands.
Asiaticus's. family, the Valerians, to show that they did not wish to associate themselves with his treasonable words, were then obliged to present Messalina with, the Gardens of Lucullus as a peace-offering; though naturally I never suspected it at the time, they were the real cause of Asiaticus's death. I tried the Petra brothers and executed them, and the Tristonia sisters then committed suicide. As for Assario, it seems that I signed his death-warrant: but I have no recollection of this. When I told Pallas to warn him for trial I was told that he had already been executed, and was shown the warrant, which was certainly not forged. The only explanation that I can offer is that Messalina, or possibly Polybius, who was her tool, smuggled the death-warrant in among a number of other unimportant ones that I had to sign, and that I signed it without reading it. I know now that this sort of trick. was constantly played on me that they, took advantage of the strain from which my eyes were again suffering (so much that I had to stop all reading by artificial light) to read out as official reports and letters for my signature improvisations that did not correspond at all with the written documents.
About this time Vinicius died, of poison. I heard, some years later, that he had refused to sleep with Messalina and that the poison was administered by her; certainly he died on the day after he had dined at the Palace. The story is quite likely to be true. So now Vinicius, Vinicianus, and Asiaticus, the three men who had offered themselves as Emperor instead of me, were all dead, and their deaths seemed to lie at my door. Yet I had a clean conscience about them. Vinicianus and Asiaticus were clearly traitors, and Vinicius, I thought, had died as the result of an accident. But the Senate and People knew Messalina better than I did, and hated me because of her. That was the invisible barrier between them and me, and nobody had the courage to break it down.
As the result of a strong speech that I made about Asiaticus, at a session in which Sosibius and Crispinus were voted cash presents for their services, the Senate voluntarily surrendered to me the power of granting its members permission to leave. Italy on any pretext.
Chapter 26
MY daughter Antonia had been married for some years to young Pompey but they had no children yet. One evening I visited her at her house, in Pompey's absence, and it occurred to me how disconsolate and bored she now, always looked. Yes, she agreed, she was bored, and very bored and more than bored. So I suggested that she' would feel much happier if she had a child and told her that I thought it was her duty as a healthy young woman with servants and plenty of money to have not only one child but several. With a family of young children she need never complain of boredom. She flared up and said: 'Father, only a fool would expect a field of corn to spring up where no seed has been sown. Don't blame the soil, blame the farmer. He sows salt, not seed.' And to my astonishment she explained that the marriage had never been properly consummated; and not only that, but she had been used in the vilest possible way by my son-in-law. I asked her why she had not told me of this before, and she said that she didn't think that I would believe her, because I had never really loved her, not as I loved her half- brother and half-sister; and that young Pompey had boasted to her that he stood so well with me now that he could make me do anything he wanted and believe anything that he told me. So what chance had she? Besides, there would be the shame of having to testify in court to the horrible things that he had done to her, and she could not face that.
I grew angry, as any father would, and assured her that I loved her dearly, and that it was chiefly on her
